Chapter 37: Stay (Alex's POV) I felt my heart breaking as he said those words to me. "You don't believe me?" I asked, my voice breaking. "Frankly, no," he shook his head. "Why?" I questioned. "Because you weren't in your right mind, Alex. You could have done something wrong and you either really don't remember because you were drunk, or you're using alcohol as an excuse to hide it," he said. "So, you think I cheated?" "Yes," he nodded. "With who?" "Hudson, someone else, I don't know," he shrugged. I can't do this. I can't. He really thought I would cheat on him with Hudson? He wouldn't believe me now, no matter what I said. Because he made up his mind. He simply didn't trust me. "Okay," I sighed in defeat. "Okay?" he asked. "Okay, Carter. You think I cheated. What do you want me to do?" I asked, trying my hardest to stay calm. "You're not even gonna deny it?" he laughed humorlessly. "I already did. I told you earlier and I'll tell you again. I did not cheat on you. I love you." His eyes snapped to mine. "I would never do that. But you don't believe me. Because you never trusted me," I concluded, "Even though I never gave you a reason not to." "This is reason enough. I'm leaving." "You have to stay," I blurted out. He stared at me. "Stay. Stay right here, and stand right there. Say what you want to. Say everything you want to and then be on your way. Don't you dare leave without saying things you want to." I didn't want him to leave this on a cliffhanger. I wouldn't be able to take it. Closure was necessary. Without it, I'd lose even the little composure I currently had. "Why, Alex? Why will that matter?" "Because we both deserve that closure. Don't we?" He sighed, running his hands through his hair. I watched as he formed fists and stared at the ground. "Just do it, Carter. Twist the knife," I mumbled under my breath. "It's over." I let out a shaky breath while closing my eyes tightly. I only opened them when I heard my front door open and then close. I ran up the stairs immediately, locking my bedroom door behind me before sitting on my bed. I stared off into space for a really long time, trying to make myself understand that this wasn't a nightmare. This was reality. Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry, Alex. Do not cry. I fell back and stared at the ceiling, trying to swallow past the aching lump in my throat. I stared at my walls, my eyes drifting to the sketches he had given to me. I looked away from them and lay down, muffling my cries into the pillow. I sobbed, I yelled, I bawled my eyes out. I woke up after that to darkness. I must have fallen asleep while crying. I lay there and replayed the moment in my head. "How could he not trust me? If he loved me so much, why didn't he believe me?" I asked myself. Did I do something wrong? I could hear the doorbell ringing repeatedly, but I didn't even bother moving. I just hoped whoever it was would eventually leave. But when they didn't, I mumbled curses and crawled out of bed. I looked like a car wreck. I threw my hair up into a bun and ran my fingers under my eyes while sniffling. I went downstairs slowly and got to the door. I opened it hesitantly and saw Hannah standing there. "Are you okay?" she asked. I sighed, rubbing my puffy eyes. "No," I cried, shaking my head. She pulled me into a hug immediately and rubbed my back. "I didn't cheat, Han. I swear," I sobbed. I felt pathetic because I despised crying in front of people, it made me feel weak. But I just couldn't stop crying. "I know you didn't, I know," she whispered, holding me there. "I didn't cheat, I swear, I swear," I said, taking in shaky breaths. "I know, hun," she mumbled. "Have you eaten?" she asked as I lay in bed and she sat at the foot of my bed. I shook my head, staring at my fingers that twiddled around each other. "It felt so right with him, Hannah. I love him," I sniffled. "I know you do." "But I have to let him go," I sighed. "No, you don't." I looked up at her in confusion. "We are going to prove to him that you are not a cheater," she said, determined. "How am I going to do that? He's made up his mind, Han. It's not going to change. He doesn't trust me. If he can tell me he loves me and still can't trust me, then what is the point?" I groaned. "The point is, he trusts you and he loves you. He just doesn't know what happened to you and that freaked him out. Just talk to him, Alex," she sighed. I shook my head, "I can't talk to him. He's the one that walked out. I'm not going to be the one to drag him back to a place he doesn't want to be at with someone he doesn't even wanna see right now," I explained. "Alex. He's never loved someone like he loves you. I think just the thought that it was possible, it's always possible. With anyone. I think that thought scared the lights out of him. So much that he ruined everything himself." "Are you defending him?" I pouted. "No, I'm on your side, babe. Always. I just think he has no clue what to do. Which is why he needs to know the truth." I stared at my blanket that I fidgeted with. "How am I going to prove to him that I didn't cheat when he's so convinced I did?" I asked. She stared at the floor in thought while I stared off into space, feeling my heart break even more. "It was Abby's house. She had to know something that could help. Maybe she-" The doorbell rang, interrupting her. She looked at me in confusion before going downstairs and getting the door for me. She came back up with Abby and Zach behind her. "Hey," they said in sync. "Hi," I mumbled, pulling the covers up to my cheeks. They sat with me, all three of them and comforted me. Zach left first to go see Carter. Connor was already with him but even I felt like it was wrong for me to have Zach here when he's Carter's cousin. "So you think someone slipped something in your drink?" Hannah asked me. I nodded, "That has to be it, Han. You remember calling me, right? When you couldn't find your phone but then you found it?" She nodded in response. "I left my drink in the kitchen when that happened. Then I went back there. Nobody was around it, I didn't think anything of it, the thought didn't even cross my mind. I just drank it all. Cut to a little while later and I pass out without remembering anything?! That has to be it," I huffed while sitting up. "Try remembering something, Alex. It might help," Abby suggested. That would have been a great suggestion if I hadn't already tried it a hundred times. "I can't remember anyth- wait," I said, "There was a car." "A car?" "Yes, a car." The moment replayed in my head like a flashback on loop. "What car?" Hannah asked. "A black one. I-I remember someone um- I was sitting there and I was really dizzy. Like really dizzy. I think I almost fell, or I stood up and bumped into someone or I- wait- I think I was about to pass out in the kitchen." I hope I'm remembering the right stuff. "Someone grabbed me." "Grabbed you?!" Their eyes widened. "No! Someone held me. So I wouldn't fall. I think. They took me somewhere. I-I thought it was Carter. I think I even-" It was all coming back to me. "I think I even told him to tuck me in when I got home." And whoever it was, really did. "I thought it was Carter. But obviously-" "It wasn't," Abby finished for me. "Who was it then?" Hannah questioned. "I don't know, I don't know, I- God!" I groaned into a pillow. It has to be someone who knows where the spare key is. I didn't take my keys. I planned to use the spare. "The car! A camaro! It was a black camaro! I remember the inside. I remember the smell. It smelt like-" I paused, "Like sandalwood and vodka," I whispered. There's only one person who smells like that. "Hudson," Abby and I said in sync. "I saw him!" she exclaimed. "What?" I asked. "I saw him. Put something in your drink. A pill. I think it was a pill. I was wasted. I don't know if the drink was yours or- I wasn't sure if it was real or if I was imagining things or if it was really him but-" she paused, "He drugged you." "He has a black camaro too, Alex," Hannah said. And he knows where my spare key is. My breathing quickened as I bit the skin around my nails. "How do we prove it?" Hannah asked. Silence. "Simple," Abby said, "We make him do it again but this time-" "We catch him," I said, "This time we catch him." . . . .