Chapter 91 I Wouldn't Let You Murder Anyone 1
NADIA
Two weeks passed in the blink of an eye, but I must say that the atmosphere between Dean and me was anything but pleasant.
I spent the trip back to New York with a sour face, because in addition to his outburst about my attacker wanting to kill me, I also found out that I have to abstain from physical exercise for a month, including sexual activity.
And with that, we concluded that we would both be extremely grumpy, and for that reason, we decided to spend a week apart.
Dean wanted a few days to look for my attacker, and I wanted a few days to yell at him for all his insistence on wanting to kill someone.
Well, I don't want to play the saint or anything, but I won't allow my boyfriend to kill someone for revenge, only to then go to jail and get a life sentence.
God forbid.
I would die of heartbreak if anyone took away my right to have Dean by my side, as a companion and lover.
I love him, and I love him too much...
So much that I would sacrifice anything to see him smile every day, without tantrums, pointless arguments, or death threats.
I know he's not made of pure goodness, because he insists on reminding me of that with every overreaction.
But he's not made of pure evil either, because he loves me immensely and that's what I cling to to make him change his mind about this crazy murder.
"Dean, are you going to keep insisting on this nonsense?" I ask nervously.
We're inside his car discussing the same absurd topic, where he thinks he's the assassin from the action movie who kills for revenge and then gets away with the crime.
But the justice system in the United States doesn't work quite like that...
"I already said I'm going, damn it!" he exclaimed angrily.
"But you could be arrested!" I exclaimed back.
"I don't care," he said seriously.
You don't care?! - I got pissed. - And me, Dean? You don't care about me either?!
He seemed to realize he had gone too far, because his closed expression softened as soon as he saw me crying.
"I'm sorry, my love." He stroked my thigh.
"I won't forgive you until you get that crazy idea out of your head." I wiped away my tears and removed his hand from my thigh.
"Don't do that, Nadia," he warned.
"Yes, I will, and if you, Mr. Hartford, don't change that ogre-like head of yours, we'll never have a future together," I said confidently.
Dean was silent for a moment, and I saw suffering in his eyes, as if he were struggling internally with his demons.
And what hurt me the most was knowing that he was a proud man, and that when it came to something he believed was right, he rarely backed down.
"If that's what you want, that's how it's going to be," he said, looking away from me.
The car stopped and I realized we were already in front of my house.
"You're a proud bastard!" I yelled at him.
"And you're a stubborn woman!" he shouted back.
"Then we should take a break..." I hesitated in my voice.
"We really should," he stated.
Okay, then let's take a break. - I said, getting out of the car in a hurry.
Dean didn't say anything and just sat there with the car parked while I ran home crying.
When I got home, I ran to the window and saw him start the car and drive off, tires screeching.
What the hell have I done?
I found myself sobbing like crazy, so much so that sometimes I choked from lack of breath.
My face was red and swollen, and new tears replaced those that had spread across my pillow.
I was lying in bed criticizing myself for asking for some time apart...
But why ask for some damn time apart, when now is the time I need to be close to him the most?
I'm really stubborn.
I kept crying while listening to music on my headphones, when I suddenly had a craving for strawberries with salt.
I tried to ignore this strange craving, but every minute I kept thinking about strawberries with salt.
So before I went crazy, I got out of bed and went to the kitchen, where I grabbed some strawberries from the fridge and filled a spoon with salt.
Then I sat down on one of the kitchen stools and groaned as I ate the first salted strawberry.
And I must say that I had never eaten strawberries like that before, but it seemed like heaven to me.
In less than ten minutes I had already devoured a bowl of strawberries with salt, and I must confess that I have never felt so satisfied.
But that feeling didn't last long, because soon after I felt an overwhelming urge to vomit.
The urge to vomit was so strong that I couldn't leave the kitchen and had to vomit in the sink.
What the hell is that?
I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand and frantically started searching for my iPhone.
Where are you, you bastard?
I looked like a crazy person calling my cell phone a cursed thing, but as soon as I found it, I smiled and pressed it against my chest.
Then I unlocked it and typed in the symptoms I was experiencing.
An overwhelming urge to eat something random, unexpected nausea, and mood swings.
It can't be...
I kept reading that damn word " pregnancy" in every answer on the websites I went to.
But I'm on birth control, this must be a false alarm.
So I left Google and went into my calendar, where I saw something really messed up.
It's been a month since my injection was due.
"No," I murmured, shocked.
"This can't be happening, my doctor hasn't said anything to me..."
I can't be pregnant!