Chapter 51 The Price of What We Want

Chapter 51 The Price of What We Want
Bellatrix stared out at the ocean, swallowing hard against the lump in her throat. "I really like him, Mayzie. I mean, I really, really like him. When we're together, I’m happier than I’ve ever been. And just when I think it's impossible to feel anything more, he smiles at me, and my heart just aches from how perfect it is." She turned back to face Mayzie. "I don’t feel that way with Clyde. I love him, I do, but he doesn't make me feel alive the way Blake does."

"I'm sorry, but that just sounds like emotional garbage to me," Mayzie said, her voice cold. "You betrayed your two closest friends. You hurt us and left us behind. It’s completely selfish, and honestly, I don’t want a friend who drops me the second something flashier comes along." She took a step back. "And I definitely don't want a friend who sides with my enemy."

"Dalton isn't your enemy," Bellatrix sighed. "Look, I know my reasons seem shallow and self-centered, but they’re all I have. I only have two months with him, and then it’s over. I won't try to hold on, and I won't pretend we have a future. So please, just let me make this one huge mistake. I know it’s foolish and wrong, but I want this so badly. I just want to experience the kind of love I’ve always dreamed of, even briefly. Then I’ll go right back to being the old Bellatrix."

Mayzie shook her head. "Sometimes, no matter how much you want something, the price tag is just too high, and mostly it's not worth the price. You broke my trust and you broke Clyde's. How are we supposed to look at you as a loyal friend after this?"

"I know I damaged things, and I promise I’ll fix them when this is over. I'll show both of you that I'm all over it, and I’ll be there whenever you need me. I just need this one thing. And I need to know that when it all ends, you'll still be there for me."

"Why?"

"Because it’s going to hurt so much when it ends," Bellatrix admitted, her voice cracking. "I feel weak just thinking about it. You’ve always been my protector — the person I lean on when things fall apart. I know I haven’t been the best at supporting you, but you’ve never really reached out to me. I'm always the one leaning, and I don't know how to stand on my own right now. I just desperately need to know you’ll catch me when this ends."

"The only way I can forgive you is if Clyde does," Mayzie said. "You wronged him the most. I can't split my loyalties between the two of you. We're either friends all together, or we're nothing."

Bellatrix nodded slowly. "I'll talk to him. I'll make him understand, and hopefully, he'll forgive me in time."

Mayzie hesitated, balancing on the edge of saying more before turning back toward her room.

"What's wrong?" Bellatrix asked softly.

"Everything," Mayzie said. "What happened to us? Not long ago, we were just having fun at school and work. Now, we barely even speak. It’s those five guys. They tore down our quiet lives, and we haven't had a moment of peace since."

"Well, once you quit working for Dalton and things end between Blake and me, maybe we can get some of that back." Bellatrix offered a faint smile. "We’ll be different, sure, and Clyde will still be around, but we’ll find our normal again."

Suddenly, Mayzie's composure broke, and tears began to stream down her face. "He won't talk to me. He told me I was just a game."

Bellatrix froze. She had never seen Mayzie cry before. "What? Who?"

"Arking," Mayzie sobbed, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. "He told me we should go out after I broke up with Alonso. I thought he was going to be my safety net when I had to end things with Alonso. I needed him, but he told me it was all a joke. He was just playing with me, trying to see if he could get me into bed."

Anger fired through Bellatrix, quickly followed by deep sympathy for her friend. "I can't believe he’d do that to you. He always seemed so genuine. Why would he..." She trailed off, suddenly remembering what Blake had mentioned... about Dalton's actual feelings for Mayzie.

"I don't know if I can even break up with Alonso if I don't have anyone waiting on the other side," Mayzie stated.

"I'll be there. And Clyde will be too." Bellatrix reached out, but the wide gap between their balconies kept her from touching her friend.

"I was actually starting to like him, Bella. I really thought..." Mayzie sighed, shaking her head. "I don't know what I was thinking. I was stupid. I knew he was a flirt, and I told myself I’d get hurt, but I fell for it anyway."

"Don't do that to yourself, Mayzie. He isn't worth your tears, if that's how he treats you," Bellatrix said, her brows furrowing. "Please don't cry. It breaks my heart to see you like this."

Mayzie cleared her throat, aggressively wiping the remaining tears from her cheeks. "I'm going to lie down. I'm skipping dinner."

"Why?"

"Because Dalton is an asshole," Mayzie mumbled, disappearing back into her room.

Down below the balcony, Dalton stood in the shadows next to Gustav. They had caught every word. Gustav braced himself for Dalton to launch into a rant about how ridiculous girls were, or how he’d thought Mayzie was different but was clearly wrong. Instead, Dalton simply dropped his head, shoved his hands deep into his pockets, and walked back into the manor in complete silence.

Later at the dinner table, the atmosphere was suffocating. Dalton spent the entire meal glaring across the table at Arking. Unbothered, Marga and Cielo chatted loudly about their great day and all the things their hosts had bought them. Thelma was completely wrapped up in Arking, feeding him bites of food and kissing his cheek while whispering in his ear. Arking knew exactly what kind of look Dalton was giving him, but he did his best to pretend his furious friend didn't exist.

Ember could clearly feel the storm brewing between the two men, but Gustav, Blake, and Ariel remained quiet, choosing not to intervene. Everyone around the table was acutely aware of the hostility Dalton brought with him, but they all collectively decided to ignore it. Even Clyde knew better than to push his luck tonight.

Bellatrix brought her own heavy energy to the table, her eyes occasionally drifting toward Arking, losing their usual brightness whenever she looked at him. Blake noticed, but he doubted anyone else could perceive her quiet sadness next to the raging fire coming off Dalton.

"It’s been a long day, I'm heading to bed," Ember announced. Her three friends quickly agreed and followed her out, eager to escape before things inevitably exploded.

Arking smiled down at Thelma as she ran her hands gently over his shoulders. "I'll see you upstairs," she whispered before heading up into the manor.

Clyde stood up next. "I'm going for a walk."

At those words, Blake gave Bellatrix a subtle nudge, gesturing for her to follow him. She nodded, standing up as Clyde made his way down the steps. "Can I come with you?"

He shrugged without looking back. "I guess." His eyes flicked to Blake, who simply offered a faint grin before turning completely away.

Clyde and Bellatrix walked in silence for a while. He couldn't tell if she actually wanted to talk to him or if she was just escaping the suffocating tension. Once the manor was well out of sight and the ambient lights began to fade, Bellatrix sighed and stopped, her hand reaching out to catch his. In the dim darkness, he could barely make out the features of her face.

"I am so sorry, Clyde. I didn't know Blake would be there that day, and I had no idea he was going to kiss me. If you had told me that morning that it would happen and that I’d let him, I would have told you that you were crazy."

"So, what's the plan here?" Clyde asked, his voice strained. "Are you just going to stand here and tell me how little I matter compared to some other guy?"

She shook her head rapidly. "I love you, Clyde. I really do, whether you believe me or not. Why do you think I broke up with you a year ago? I wanted us to work, but I knew I was only holding you back."

"You have a really messed up way of showing people you care about them."

"Blake and I only have two months together. After that, it's over," she pleaded. "He’s engaged, Clyde. He can't stay with anyone for long because he’s afraid of catching real feelings. I've liked him for such a long time, and I just want to experience being with him, even if it’s just a temporary thing."

"And I'm just supposed to hang around and wait for you while you're with someone else?"

Her face fell. "No, I’m not asking you to wait. As my ex, you have every right to be angry and hate me for what I did. But as my best friend... can't you try to understand? You wanted me, and you were willing to take whatever pieces of me you could get, right?"

He nodded reluctantly.

"That's exactly how I feel about Blake. When these two months are up, he’ll just be a friend, if that. And when that happens, I just want things to go back to normal for us."

Clyde grimaced, turning his gaze toward the dark sea.

"I know it's asking a lot for you to forgive me, and maybe I don't deserve it," she said, managing a small, sad smile. "But you know we aren't the same as we used to be, right?"

"You didn't even give me a shot," he said, turning back to her. "When Mayzie was around, you’d hold my hand and act all sweet, but the second we were alone, you went completely cold. I knew you were just putting on a performance for her, but still..."

"Of course I was, because I promised her I’d try. But I just didn't have the energy to keep it up when she wasn't looking." Bellatrix crossed her arms. "After everything we’ve been through, don't you think we just make better friends anyway?"

"Fine," Clyde said quietly. "We can be friends after you're done with Blake."

"Really?" A small glimmer of relief broke through her expression.

"Yes. But I'm going to ask Mayzie out. She actually likes me, she treats me well, and I can always make her smile. So, if you don't mind..."

"No, you can't do that," Bellatrix cut in quickly.

Clyde raised an eyebrow. "Oh? And why not?"

"Because she likes someone else."

"I know all about Arking," Clyde countered. "Mayzie actually talks to me, you know. She can't tell you anything because you completely overreact, and you can't keep a secret."

Bellatrix flinched.

"He's a jerk who treats her like garbage. It won't be hard to make her forget about him." He knew he was lying, and he knew he shouldn't be playing these games, but he had to test her. He needed to know if she truly just wanted him as a friend.

"It would just be too awkward," she muttered.

He shrugged. "Awkward for you, maybe. Deal with it. It’s awkward for me to sit at dinner while Blake kisses you and feeds you. If I can handle that, you can handle this."

"You think it's easy for me to watch that other girl all over you?" Bellatrix snapped. "She doesn't even give me a second to talk to you. I was shocked she let you out of her sight tonight."

"Why do you care? We're just friends, remember?"

Bellatrix opened her mouth to argue, then closed it, losing her momentum.

"We aren't just friends, are we?" Clyde pressed softly.

"I'm so confused, Clyde," she whispered, her voice trembling. "My heart hurts knowing how badly I hurt you, and it kills me that I can't give you what you want. But I want to be with Blake so badly it hurts."

He dropped his head, the fight leaving his body. "Then go be with him."

"What?"

"I didn't mean any of that stuff, I just said. I don't see Mayzie that way. I'm sorry." Clyde ran his hands over his face, letting out a ragged sigh. "Bellatrix, I love you. No matter how much you hurt me, or how many times you walk away, I just sit here like a beaten dog waiting for you to come back. So go to him. Spend whatever time you need with him, but just come back to me when it’s over. I’ll be here."

"Clyde..."

"I know it sounds like I'm just giving you permission to step all over me, and... I guess I am. I told you I’d do anything to be with you. If this is what I have to put up with to keep you in my life, then I'll do it. Just promise me you'll come back."

Bellatrix swallowed hard. "I promise."

He looked up, genuinely surprised that she had agreed so easily. Before she could take the words back, he stepped into her space and gently pressed his lips to hers. Bellatrix didn't pull away. Instead, she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him closer, deepening the kiss. She tried to murmur another apology against his lips, but Clyde kept her mouth occupied. He didn't want her to think about what she was doing; if she started thinking, the guilt would make her pull away.

"Hey, dark-haired girl."

Blake's voice broke the silence, shattering the moment.

Bellatrix scrambled backward, her face burning with shame as she realized Blake had caught them. She braced herself for the explosion. For the second time, her boyfriend had caught her kissing another guy.

"Dalton is in a terrible mood. Everyone needs to get to their rooms and stay out of his way tonight," Blake said smoothly, his voice entirely casual, as if he hadn't just witnessed his girlfriend in another man's arms. "Let's go."

He extended his hand. Bellatrix took it, though her fingers were trembling violently against his palm. Clyde stood frozen, watching in silence as Bellatrix walked away with another man.

"You should get back to your room, too. Shortie told me she's waiting for you," Blake added.

Clyde didn't reply. He just turned and bolted past them, desperate to get away before Bellatrix could see the sheer agony written across his face.

"Blake, I'm so sorry, I can—"

"No need to explain," Blake cut her off, leading her firmly back toward the manor. "I'm the one who's supposed to be faithful to you, not the other way around. Besides, I already know how you feel about him."

He kept his pace just a step ahead of her, keeping his back turned so she couldn't see how deeply the sight of them together had just cut him.