Chapter 54 CHAPTER 054
It has never occured to me that Linc believed I would be the one to leave. To end things. I don't know why I have always just thought he would be the one to turn me away when he gets bored or had enough of me. Or can't stand that I still feel guilty even though my mother hurt him. I just always thought there was one way this was going to end and that the decision laid with him. Because I was in love with him. I love him.
I have never thought about what would happen when my three months is up. I have spent a month and the time flew by me in a haze. A lot has happened. I have lived experiences that I didn't think was possible. Taboos. Forbidden. I have been bold and I have enjoyed it.
I don't think I would be the same person I used to be before I came down to New York. But that doesn't mean I wouldn't go back to my life in Boston.
I have got college. It is important to me to finish school. My degree would be the one thing that would belong sorely to me in this world. I need it.
It occurs to me that I don't have a plan for when the three months internship is up and I have to leave. I have just always thought he would push me away and that was it. After he asked me to move out that first night, I simply believed he held the power to determine what happens to us.
The stark vulnerability in his eyes, looking up at me like this, and saying that, with his voice all low and deep, it hits me like a train of butterflies to the chest.
"Oh." I mutter softly.
What do I say to that? I can't slip up and say that I love him again. We barely moved past that. I bite down on my lip. Feeling like the tension would make me go crazy.
"Well, it is a good thing we have got all night then." Linc says. His smile is weak but it lights up his impossibly handsome face. I return the smile and he goes back to trailing kisses down my body. Inflaming every inch of skin his lips touch. The vulnerable moment passes and transforms into another kind of vulnerability when his mouth hovers over my bare skin below my lower belly.
"Yes..." I say and he leans into me, lips first, going for the sensitive nub of my clit, I lose my train of thoughts and sink into the jolt of pleasure that rides through me as he takes me gently in between his lips.
"So fucking soft." Linc mutters into my folds. I think I might go crazy at the intensity of the pleasure. It is not the first time he will be eating me out but this time around, there is a desperation behind every flick of his expert tongue. Every pattern he swirls, there is a lingering desire that gnaws at my hold on reality. Pushing me to the edge. Too fast.
The fact that he had just shared his fear of me leaving and ending things between us, admitting that this is temporary and it is necessary that it ends, it just makes me all the more hungry for him. For this. For tonight to last as long as possible. It feels like we have cast a deadline to us. Like we won't be the same tomorrow.
I don't know what Tyler would do. The truth is we both don't. I try to make myself believe Linc when he assured me that Tyler won't post that video online. I try. But I don't believe it. It doesn't stick. I don't have the same conviction he has. I was the one that dealt with Tyler. I saw the coldness in his eyes. That man would do anything to get his way. But I swallowed my doubts in the face of Linc's confidence. And lie to myself that tomorrow would pass without my whole world turning upside down.
"There... There-eee...oh my God!" Linc listens to me, stilling his tongue on the spot that sends a bolt of pleasure, so deep, so raw to my brain, I squirm uncontrollably underneath him.
My juices overflow, my eyes roll to the back of my head, all my muscles tense, Linc doesn't stop, he laps up at me from the spot, unrelenting, I wonder if his tongue won't cramp, but he stays at it till I cry out when the sensation becomes needle sharp, threatening to consume me whole if I don't make a sound.
My cry is hoarse and desperate, and Linc eases the pressure, pulling his tongue away momentarily. I try to catch my breath but I am so far winded, it is impossible. It is not an orgasm but it leaves me breathing hard like this. I wonder what is going to happen when he really makes me climax. My body tingles in anticipation.
Linc comes up to kiss me. It is deep and hard. Our tongues fight for dominance, I lose but I put up a noble fight. I taste my juices on his tongue and it only makes me flood more. Linc presses into me, hard muscles outlining my soft curves and it might be suffocating in a different setting. But not this. Not here. I want to be smothered by him. I crave it. I relish it.
"That was a preamble and I got you all breathy and sweaty already." He whispers against my lips when we pull up for air. His skin is hot against mine and I can't tell whose body is heating up. Maybe it is us both. Our bodies are flush against each other, it feels delicious. Decadent. No amount of judgement could make me think this thing between us is not right. It feels perfect. And I don't even need to explain it to anyone.
I allow a couple seconds to pass between us, catch my breath and orient my thoughts, so I can take him by surprise when I jerk up suddenly, turning so he is pinned underneath me, I lock my thighs on either side of his hips and his dark eyes flare at me with all the seductiveness in the world, my core erupts with pure fire as I feel his hard thickness on my inner thigh.
"Well, time to get you all sweaty and bothered too. Wouldn't that be fair?" I whisper, leaning down to kiss him.