Chapter 181 184

Chapter 181 184
It all underscores one obvious point: I don’t belong here.

Feeling pissed off, I turn back to Evie.

“Hey, tesoro, Charlotte’s gonna take a while. How about we get out of here?”

She tilts her head to the side. “Will Charlotte be okay, though?”

I force a smile onto my face. “She’ll be fine.”

I take her hand and walk her out of the church. On our way out, I notice Xander’s mother by the church door, thanking mourners for coming for the funeral.

“Deepest sympathies,” I tell her, hoping that I come off as sincere.

As put-off as I am by all the doom and gloom on display here, I have no desire to make an old woman feel worse on the day she’s going to bury her son.

Even if that son had been a waste of life.

“Thank you,” she says with a half-smile that doesn’t quite work. Her eyes linger on Evie. “Your daughter?”

“Yes, this is Evie.”

“Evie,” she repeats. “She has your eyes. You came with Charlotte, didn’t you?”

I pause. “Yes, we did.”

“That was kind of you. And you’re her…?”

I hesitate, unsure how to answer.

Thankfully, Evie saves me by speaking up for me.

“Charlotte’s my nanny,” she says. “She’s the best nanny.”

“Oh,” Silvia says, her eyes going wide. “I wasn’t aware she was a professional nanny. Good for her.”

“I’m sorry, you’ll have to excuse us,” I say, cutting off her next question. “But again, deepest condolences.”

Then I pull Evie out of the church and down the steps.

“Who was she, Papa?” Evie asks.

“Just… someone who knows Charlotte,” I reply distractedly as I try to remember where I parked the car.

Once I find it, I make sure Evie’s strapped in and I get into the driver’s seat. I’m pulling out of the church grounds when I dial in Enzo’s number.

“Hi, boss,” he says, his voice filling up the car.

“Hi, Enzo!” Evie says enthusiastically.

“Hiya, kid,” Enzo chuckles.

“Enzo, I need you to come to Saint Joseph’s Church,” I instruct him. “Charlotte’s here. After the funeral, bring her back to the compound.”

“Got it, boss.”

I hang up, already feeling relieved to be out of that oppressive atmosphere.

“Are we going back home, Papa?” Evie asks.

I hesitate. “Actually, no,” I tell her. “I’ve got a surprise for you.”

“Really?” she says, clapping her hands together. “What’s the surprise?”

“You’re going to spent the night with your nonni.”

The clapping cuts off abruptly.

“My nonni?” Evie repeats, sounding wary all of a sudden.

I don’t fucking blame her.

“Yes. Your nonni. Your grandmother,” I clarify. “I’m sure she’ll really love spending time with you. It’ll be nice for the two of you to get to know each other.”

I glance at Evie through the rearview mirror.

She looks suspicious.

I feel bad.

But there’s a good reason for it.

A fight is brewing between Charlotte and me. A vicious one. I don’t want Evie around to witness that.

God knows she’s been through enough.

“Don’t worry, she doesn’t bite. And there’s always great food at her place.”

Evie considers it for a minute. “Okay, but I want to take Paulie with me. And I want one of the brownies that Charlotte made last week.”

The kid’s got some serious negotiation skills.

But given the fact that I’m about to palm her off on my mother for a night, I’m willing to cave easily to her demands.

I turn the car in the direction of the compound.

“Deal.”

38

Charlotte

“Have you seen Lucio and Evie anywhere?” I ask Vanessa, craning my neck to see above the crowd.

It shouldn’t be so hard to spot them.

Lucio sticks out like a sore thumb.

Vanessa looks around with me. “I don’t think they’re in the church. Maybe they went outside for a walk?”

I bite my lip and take another scan around the room.

There’s definitely no sign of them anywhere, and it’s starting to worry me.

I’m aware that Lucio has been on edge all day. Moodier than usual.

But I haven’t given it much thought. Until right now.

“I’m just gonna head out to check,” I tell Vanessa.

“Sure, babe. I’ll wait for you here.”

I give her a half-hearted smile and head towards the massive arched church doors.

There’s a small gathering of people blocking the entrance. I’m so focused on maneuvering past them that I almost miss Silvia waving me over.

“Sorry, Silvia,” I say. “I just needed some air.”

“You and me both, darling,” she says with a sad smile. “If you’re looking for that handsome gentleman you came with, he went outside with his daughter.”

“Oh. Thank you.”

“He told me you were his nanny,” Silvia says. “I’m glad you landed on your feet. I always knew you would.”

I frown. “Landed on my feet?” I repeat, slightly confused by the choice of words.

She looks instantly uncomfortable. “I’m sorry, dear. Xander did tell me about your troubles,” she admits, looking guilty.

“My troubles?”

She clears her throat and pats my shoulder. “Forget it. I’m just an old woman talking nonsense. It’s not important.”

“What did Xander tell you?” I press.

“He told me about your substance abuse struggles,” she says at last.

I go rigid instantly, my limbs tingling. Anger flushes out the sadness.

I’m left standing there, completely blindsided and unbelievably furious.

“He told you what?” I ask.

“Well, he said you were in rehab trying to sort through it,” she says. “And I couldn’t be more proud of you for seeing it through. I can’t imagine you would have gotten a job as a nanny for such a nice family if you hadn’t beaten those demons back where they belong. Good for you, love.”

I swallow back the bitter anger.

But it’s taking every ounce of willpower in my possession to stay calm and composed.

“So he told you that was why we broke up? Because I was a junkie?”

“Well, yes,” Silvia says with a baffled nod. “Isn’t it…?”

I could set her straight right now. Tell her the truth. Rip away the veil of bullshit. Make sure she understands just what kind of sniveling coward she gave birth to before they put his ass in the ground forever.

But as quickly as my anger comes, it dissipates.

I forget about my own personal feelings.

And I just look at the broken old woman standing hunched in front of me.

Her only crime was believing what Xander told. Trusting her son.

I don’t despise her for it.

I pity her. I empathize with her.

Because I did the exact same thing.

“Right,” I tell her. “It was the reason we broke up. I wanted to focus on my sobriety.”

To my own ears, my words sound forced and robotic.

But Silvia doesn’t seem to notice.

“And it was the right choice, dear,” she says. “Look at you now. You’re glowing.”

I paste a tough smile on my face.

“Excuse me, Silvia. I’m just gonna step out for a moment.”

“Of course.”

I head down the church steps and look around the massive lawn. There are cops in dress uniform and civilians milling around in their mourning outfits.