Chapter 76

POV S I E N N A

"I'm ready." He said the words with complete conviction, so much so I thought I heard him wrong. I pulled my head away from his chest and looked back up at him. I could see it in his eyes, the complete conviction and trust staring back at me. I didn't know what to think of it.

Why was he suddenly ready now? He wasn't ready the night of the storm so what made him want to now? Did he feel bad for you? Did he think having sex with you would make you feel better?

"Right now?" I asked slightly taken aback.

"Yes – shit, this is probably really bad timing, isn't it?" that was an understatement. I didn't know how long I stayed in his arms until I stopped crying and even when I did, I remained there, in his warm comfort. I had never felt so close to him. He made me feel safe and gave me this sense of peace I had never experienced in my life.

"No, I just.... please don't do this because you pity me." I stepped away and spoke. Did he feel bad for me? Did he want to do this because I said I hated myself? Did he think sex would make this go away? However, something in me told me that this was different. He cupped my face between his large, warm hands and shook his head, his eyes never leaving mine.

"I'm not."

"Are you sure because I don't want you to feel you have to and –"

He cut me off by placing his lips on mine in a gentle kiss. It wasn't rushed or desperate. It was slow, telling me he wanted this. He wanted me.

He pulled away and rested his forehead against mine. "I want this."

My words had run out, all I could think to say was, "I just don't want you to feel like you have to make me feel better by fixing me with sex." Sex made people forget. I wasn't a stranger to that concept, that was why I slept with people whenever Adam and I broke up or had an argument. It made me forget all the horrible things said and done, but it never made anything better. It only made things worse.

"You're not broken, Sienna. There isn't anything to fix. But even if one day you shatter to pieces, I'm not going to be there with a bottle of beer and an offering of sex, I'll be there in whatever way you want. I'll be there to listen, to understand, to give you whatever you need. Trust me on that, okay?"

I swallowed my tears threatening to make a reappearance at his kind words and nodded.

"So, if you don't want to do this right now, you don't have to, I can wait. I'm just letting you know that I'll be ready whenever you are."

In that moment I realised that there was never going to be another Roman in my life. Whether in the future we part ways or remained our friendship, every piece of him would follow me. I couldn't help the thrumming of my pulse pounding against the blanket of my skin as I stared up at his eyes and saw the sky-blue storm that rain with silver flecks, telling me to trust him, to take that jump, to feel so much more closer to him. To all of him. And I wanted to take that jump. I wanted to fucking dive.

There were minimal minutes between us before I reached up and kissed him. Immediately, he kissed me back, pulling me closer to him making me get on my tiptoes and wrap arms around his neck. Every pulse in my body was pounding against my skin as he lifted me up and carried me over to my bed.

As soon as he placed me down, he crawled on top of me, his lips never leaving mine. I wrapped my legs around his waist and held my breath as his lips travelled down to my neck and circled that sweet spot with his tongue. I moaned, wrapping my legs around him tighter, pulling him closer to feel the swell in his jeans rub deliciously against my core.

I pushed my hand between us and palmed him through his jeans, feeling his groan vibrate against my skin. Fuck. His hands shakingly came to the hem of my shirt and gave me a look to check it was okay. I gave him a reassuring look back and he lifted it over my head. I wasn't even wearing a special kind of bra. It was plain grey with a little bow in the middle, it was old and worn out, my underwear was the same, black and old, still a thong but not even lacy.

I trailed my hands up his T-shirt to feel the hot, hard skin underneath, hearing his breath catch as I did so. Without hesitation, he took it off and threw it somewhere just like he did with my top. I moulded my hand up and down his torso, fixing them on his shoulder as his fingers traced around my back to the hooks of my bra. I slipped it off easily as he unhooked it and threw it somewhere behind him. Instantly, his hands cupped my breasts and kneaded them, taking his time to flick my nipples with his thumb as I continued palming him over his jeans. The swell of his erection grew, and I could tell it was paining him as he took my nipple into his mouth and groaned deeply around it. Jesus, those vibrations.

My fingers fiddled as I tried to rip away his belt, finding his zipper, pulling his jeans down. The ridge in his boxers was now far more prominent and I couldn't help myself as I slipped my hand under the band and grabbed a hold of him. Holy shit, he was so hard and throbbed under my single touch.

"Fuck." He groaned around my nipple, drawing it between his teeth, making me moan. I pumped him slowly, squeezing him gently before picking up the pace. His breath became heavier, kissing up from my breasts to my neck then finally to my lips.

I pumped him faster, swiping my thumb against the slit at the tip causing him to let out a slight moan in my mouth. Holy fucking shit. That was hot.

"Keep doing that." He praised, connecting his lips to mine. I felt the wetness grow in my underwear as I felt him grow from my touch. I remembered when I first jerked him off, how nervous he was but now... god, now he knew exactly what he wanted.

The feeling of his fingers pressing against my clit over the soft fabric of my underwear made my back arch and I let out a moan. They circled my clit, playing with the fabric to create more friction.

I pumped him, wanting him to c um so bad. Before that could happen, however, he pulled my hand out of his boxers and grabbed the band of my thong, slowly pulling it down my legs, his lips simultaneously kissing down my stomach. When he reached my core, his hands softly spread my legs and his tongue licked all the way up my slit.

"Ah." I moaned and gripped the sheets when he sucked my clit into his mouth and flicked his tongue around it, groaning to create vibrations. "That's so... That's so.... Fuck." I cried when his tongue delved inside me. Jesus Christ. He licked back up to my clit, pushing two of his fingers inside me.

I bucked my hips off the bed as he did so, curling his fingers to hit that oh-so amazing spot as his tongue flicked my clit faster and faster.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck." I groaned, pulling myself up on my elbows to watch him. Something about his head between my legs made me lose even more control.

"You're so tight." He groaned as he thrusted his fingers faster, his groans vibrating against my clit. "Fuck, I want to be inside of you so bad."

A wave of euphoria crashed over me mere seconds later as his tongue and fingers reached a speed, I didn't know was possible. My cheeks felt flushed, and I felt my juices drip down my legs.

Finding my recovery several seconds later, I pulled myself up on my knees to kiss all the way up his chest before reaching his lips. Simultaneously, I yanked down his boxers and grabbed his throbbing cock, pumping it faster than ever.

We fell back down on the bed, pure bliss circling us as I got lost in his limbs. His erection pressed against my stomach as I grinded my pussy up and down it. He let out a deep groan and as I closed my eyes as his head nudge my clit that was now so sensitive.

"Sienna..." he groaned in a whisper. I wrapped my legs around his hips and flipped us over, so I was on top. Roman looked up at me in utter awe.

"Are you sure?" I asked carefully. I wanted him to do this for him, not for me.

"I'm sure." He nodded certainly. This was happening. Fuck. This was really happening.

"D'you have a condom?" I asked and he cocked his head to the side in confusion.

"Sienna... I'm a virgin remember?" shit, oh yeah. Roman had gotten so skilled in... other areas I found myself forgetting about the fact he was still a virgin. 

I used to be on the pill, but after Adam and I's breakup, I became lazy with it to the point of not taking it at all. I reminded myself to get back on it after this.

"Oh... yeah, hang on a second." I climbed off him and rushed over to my desk, rummaging through stacks of random papers and whatever to try and find a condom. Oh c'mon, Adam must've left something round here one time. Finally finding a blue, foil packet, I rushed back to Roman and opened it with my teeth, I would do it with my hands if they weren't so shaky.

Carefully, Roman watched me as I rolled it down him, breathing heavily. Once it was on, I gazed back at him, my heart beating intensely rapid.

"You're sure you're sure about this?" I asked once more. He chuckled and shook his head.

"Yes, Sienna. I'm sure."

"Because we don't have to if –"

"Sienna, if you don't want to do this, it's okay. I can wait too." My heart melted. Why did he always have to be so sweet?

"No, no. I just want to make sure because I don't want you to... regret it, you know?"

Roman sighed with a sympathetic smile and sat up to meet me. "I could never regret it. Not when it's with you." He muttered and pushed a lock of my hair behind me ear. A small smile took over my lips as I lightly nodded. Gently, I lifted myself up and grabbed his cock, placing it at my entrance, slickening it with my wetness. I glanced up at him to see him watching me do so, his eyebrow furrowed together and his breath shaky.

"Nervous?" I whispered to him.

He gulped, "Yeah, a bit." He shyly admitted. I hadn't seen shy Roman in a while, but it was cute.

"I am too." I confessed and he looked back with a small, appreciative smile. "Relax a little for me, okay?"