*Adrik*
“Sephie…” I said, almost breathlessly. I was silent for a moment, trying to find the right words to say, but I kept my hand on her neck as she was still leaning into my hand. “That night that I compared you to a diamond and you said you would only compare yourself to a black diamond to match your soul? Remember that?” I asked. She nodded her head slightly, but didn’t open her eyes. The corners of her mouth were starting to curl in a smile as she thought about it. “I told Viktor and Ivan about that part of the conversation the next morning while you were still sleeping. I believe my exact words were ‘we all know she has the whitest soul of anybody ever, but it’s still funny.’”
She kept her eyes closed, but she had a small smile on her lips now. She thought for a moment, then opened her eyes. “I think you can have both,” she said.
“Both what?” I asked.
“Both white and black on your soul. Ivan does for sure. He saw it. We probably do too,” she said. She suddenly looked like she’d just solved a puzzle that had been perplexing her, but she immediately looked at me like she didn’t mean to say it out loud.
I couldn’t help but laugh. “You don’t have to tell me, but I can’t deny I’m very curious to know how that happened.”
She chewed on her bottom lip, torn between wanting to tell me and not sure she should. She sighed, then whispered, “whatever. You already know.” I laughed at her, which seemed to put her at ease. “When that truck hit us, I saw Ivan turn toward me. He was using his body to try and shield me, but I can clearly remember the look on his face. I could see the worry on his face when he looked at me, but then he was looking at something around me that I couldn’t see. The look on his face clearly changed to one of wonderment. The truck was pushing us into the parked cars on the side of the street. When we hit those cars, I shut my eyes. I think that’s when I hit my head. He was unconscious when I opened my eyes.” She paused again, not sure she should continue. She started to fidget with the buttons on my shirt again, focusing on that instead of looking at me as she continued. “My dad told me what Ivan saw. When I was with Ivan in his room that day that he broke down at the house and then I broke down later, he told me what he saw, after I assured him he wasn’t crazy.” She was still for a moment, then looked at me. “Ivan got his wings that day. My dad said he wrapped his wings around me right before the truck hit us, but when Ivan turned toward me, that was the moment that he got his and he saw them wrap around me and even my dad’s wings.” She dropped her gaze, chewing on her lip, not sure how I would take what she had just told me. As she was talking, I felt goosebumps rise over my entire body.
“But… How? He’s still here,” I asked.
She cut her eyes to me, grinning. “We both said the same thing. I still don’t fully understand it, but he’s not allowed to go anywhere now. My dad said he’s fully stepped into his role as my protector now that he proved he would give his life to protect me. He also said Ivan’s wings are way cooler than his. They’re white, but fade to black on the ends and apparently he’s the big guns, so he has red on the tips too.”
Ivan’s statement about Sephie’s ring design suddenly made perfect sense. “That’s why…” I caught myself before I said anything further. I didn’t want Sephie to know about that yet. She, of course, caught it.
“That’s why what?” she asked.
I smiled at her. “If I tell you that, it will ruin the surprise,” I said, reaching up and pulling her down to me. I pressed my lips against hers.
She sat up, needing to search my eyes. “You don’t think I’m crazy for saying all this?”
“Not even a little bit. Ivan has spent so much time in Hell, but despite everything, he still has a heart of gold when it comes to the people he loves. It makes sense. And honestly, I couldn’t think of a better protector for you. His inability to feel pain gives him a unique advantage,” I said. She was running her finger lightly over my face and neck as I talked.
She looked surprised. “That’s exactly what my dad said.”
“He’s becoming the secret weapon of my secret weapon.” I smiled at her, happy to see her opening up to me and relaxed about it.
She looked at me seriously. “I don’t think Ivan is the only one among us that’s spent so much time in Hell that he can walk freely between Heaven and Hell. My dad told me I could too and since you’re the one that pulled me out of my nightmare, I’m guessing you can too.”
I sighed. “You’re not wrong. When you were in your nightmare loop and my voice pulled you out of it, did you go to a dark place? Like you couldn’t see anything, almost like you were swimming in darkness?”
Her eyes got wide. “You’ve been there too. That’s how you pulled me there. That’s how I pulled Ivan there.”
I shut my eyes, nodding my head. I felt her fingers lightly running through my facial hair. She leaned down, her lips lightly brushed mine. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. I did wonder how you pulled me there, especially after I did it for Ivan and found out he goes to the same place.”
“I was a kid the first time someone tried to get to my father through me. They ran the car we were in off the road. It killed the driver instantly and the bodyguard that was with me had severe injuries. I was small enough that I somehow survived, although I still don’t know how. I heard them walk up to the car, to see if there was anyone still alive. I knew enough to play dead. They thought they had succeeded, so they left. They wanted our bodies found, thankfully. I climbed out of the car and ran for help. My father was a cold man, but I distinctly remember him picking me up when he got there. He held me all the way to the hospital. It’s one of the only times I saw him worried. I passed out on the way to the hospital. I remember feeling relief that my father was there and I felt safe, so I let go. It took me three days to wake up. Those three days were the first time I remember the darkness. I was scared at first. I cried. I screamed. I fought. Nothing worked. I finally gave in and got quiet. When I did, I realized I could vaguely see and I could barely hear voices. I was hearing my father’s voice. He never left the hospital room those three days. The man who I barely saw when I was awake wouldn’t leave me when I was out. It was his voice that I followed to find my way out. His face was the first thing I saw when I opened my eyes. It was one of the few times he told me he loved me and that he was proud of me.” I had opened my eyes when I started to tell the story. I’m glad I did. Sephie’s expression was all I needed to see to keep going. She was always so curious. I loved her interest in anything I wanted to tell her, but I also loved that she didn’t want to pry.
“See, even your father has some good in him. It might not have been very much, but it was there for those three days,” she said, smiling sweetly at me. “And he taught you how to save me, so I’m grateful for that, if nothing else.”
“I never knew it was a skill I would need to use. It never crossed my mind with Ivan. We’ve been in the hospital plenty of times with him and never once did I think about it with him.”
“Because you were never meant to pull Ivan out. You’re not the only one that doesn’t want to share in this lifetime,” she said, grinning at me.
“Sometimes you surprise me, solnishko. You constantly find new ways to make me love you even more,” I said, laughing.
She looked at me, a smile still on her lips, but her eyes were serious. “Thank you. For knowing what I need before I do, for reminding me of what I needed to hear, for trusting me enough to tell me that, and for not thinking I’m crazy. Although that last one might still be up for debate,” she said, laughing. She was trying not to worry, but I could tell she was legitimately worried. I held her gaze as long as she needed, letting her search for what she wasn’t going to find. She finally satisfied herself, her wide smile stretching across her face once more.
“I love you, Sephie. Plus infinity. Plus one,” I said, pulling her to me.
“I love you, Adrik,” she said, smiling against my lips.