Trembling with illness
I sat alone on the bed, my legs hanging off the side and my feet barely touched the ground. The night was colder than the day, and I believed it was worse when I was all alone in the tower, surrounded by an eerie silence and my own thoughts. I tried to sleep, but I couldn't, not there, not again.
There was something odd about the tower. I didn't want to be in there for another day, even another minute.
My eyes traveled over the walls and then to the window at the top. The wind whistled through the cracks and flooded in, making the room colder than it already was.
I slipped my feet under the sheets and lay down, contemplating my own life, my situation. Would it have been any different if Lucien hadn't caught me marrying another man? I doubted it, but it could've been. Maybe. My eyes shut, only for a moment, as I heard someone at the door the next minute.
"I thought you'd be awake," Estella entered, a smile hanging on her face. Was she trapped too? I wondered. "And in need of some peace of mind, so I got you this tea. It's herbal, it makes sleep so much better."
I sat up straight, my shoulders against the headboard of the bed. "What if I ran?" I asked her, a brow cocked.
"What?" She looked at me with surprise.
"What if I ran away from him? He's despicable. I couldn't imagine myself mating with someone like him. And he's cruel," I folded my arms over my chest. "One call, I just wanted to make one call to my mother. What was the big deal with it? I just didn't understand." I ranted on, and on, sharing the hundred tensions in my mind.
Estella set the cup of tea on the side of the bed, where there was a table and a lamp. It was surprising how electricity could even reach that high in the tower. She didn't sit; instead, she stood near me, her face confused.
"You might not understand his reasonings, but I did, dear. He didn't want anyone to know that you were his mate—"
"It's my mother."
"No one."
"Why not?" I furrowed my brows.
She looked away from me as if she was hiding something.
I could catch liars, not easily, but I still could. "There were things you didn't know, things you couldn't understand yet. In his own twisted way, he was protecting you, and I wasn't in a place to explain why, or what he was protecting you from."
I nodded and eased my shoulders back. "Thank you for the tea."
As much as I wanted to push further, to demand answers, I couldn't. Estella was older than me, surely wiser, and she wasn't going to spill any information on her own alpha. Her loyalty lay with him—with Lucien.
She returned my smile and stepped back. "I was arranging a room in the house. It would take a night or two, then, if you wished, you could come to stay in the house."
"I thought there were plenty of rooms, weren't there?" I asked her while bringing the cup to my lips.
"There were," she nervously looked away as if she was hiding something. "But it had been a while since there had been a guest in the house. There were some arrangements to be made. I would be awake the entire night, so I’d check on you before dawn. Try to get some sleep, dear." She quickly ended the conversation, and I questioned the secrets she was keeping from me.
As she headed to the door, I stopped her again. "Did he change his mind? Or did you convince him to let me out of this cold, imprisoning tower?"
"He—he changed his mind." She responded and then left me to my thoughts.
Relief mingled with frustration as I struggled to understand my mate’s own mind and whims. I was caught in uncertainty. I didn't know what he intended to do next with me, or what his true intentions were. He had brought me there as a prisoner even though I was his mate. What was he going to do with me?
I finished the tea in only a few minutes and then buried myself under the thick sheets. They provided warmth. I needed it more than anything else. It was cold and crippling there. Lying on my back, I stared at the ceiling for long until sleep caught onto me. When it did, I drifted into a deep slumber, hoping I wouldn't wake from it until it was all over.
I dreamed of being home, with my mother. It went on for hours and hours, or so I thought. When I woke, it was morning, and surprisingly, my mate wasn't there to force me off the bed. I was still alone, all to myself. But there was a throbbing ache spreading through my head and body. My first thought was heat, but I couldn't go into it yet.
Still a few days left.
Fucking hell.
I threw the sheets off my body as I felt a fire spread through me. It wasn't heat. It was something else, worse. When the first cough choked me, I understood what was wrong.
I was sick. Sick.
I sat up in bed, my head spinning with a dull ache that refused to subside. There was only one person to blame. My mate. I could not run in the cold for hours with all those male wolves from his pack. What else was going to happen?
Grabbing a glass of water from the table, I took a sip of it, feeling the cold liquid scrape against my raw throat. The pain worsened, mirroring the rage simmering within me. How could he have been so cruel? He could've done anything other than making me run for hours straight.
Another painful cough fled my throat, leaving me gasping for breath. I lay back down, breathing heavily while the frustration within me swelled. I wanted to scream, to unleash my anger upon my mate, to make him understand the torment he had caused.
When I finally got the energy to get up from the bed, I reached the door and tried to open it. But to my terrible luck, it was locked. My teeth ground, and I stepped back in disbelief. There was no way to leave from there, and I didn't think it could get any worse than that.
Could it?
By the time there was someone at the door, I was wracked.
There was pain all over my body, and the headache had worsened. I begged Estella, who finally came, to get me some medicine or something that could relieve the pain. She rushed off, promising to return as quickly as possible.
Minutes felt like hours as I waited, my body trembling with illness.
When Estella returned, she entered the room and gave me a bottle of medicine. "I didn't know you'd gotten so sick. How long had you been awake for?" she asked while sitting near me.
"I had no idea," I whispered, keeping my voice low. "I hated being sick more than anything else. It made me so vulnerable."
I took the medicines she gave me without wasting another second. The way Estella sat in front of me reminded me of my mother, of how she had spent days in my bedroom the last time I got sick and wouldn't dare leave my sight until I was all better.
"It's okay, dear. We all got sick sometimes," she responded, placing her hand over mine. "You'd feel better in a few hours. Just get some more rest and let the medicine do its work."
I nodded weakly and turned to the side. My eyes burned. Everything burned. I hoped I didn't go into heat at the same time I was sick. It was going to be torture, especially with my wolf who had found her mate. She wasn't going to control herself, and I doubted if I could control her.
With blurred thoughts, I fell asleep again with Estella by my side, keeping a watchful eye on me. The room felt a little less cold and lonely with her company, but it wasn't going to be long before she left.