10 Confrontation

To say I was shocked beyond measure would be the understatement of the century.

Funny how I get the shock of the year and the century in the same day. Good thing I was young and strong, otherwise the shock would’ve killed me. I seriously didn't know what I looked like at the moment. Whether scared, or petrified, or simply shocked, I had no idea. But whatever my face was portraying wasn't nice since the grimace on Hrithik-anna's face got darker.

"Ha. Ha. Ha," I tried laughing but it sounded miserable beyond measure.

To be honest, I didn't feel anything like how all the leads feel in the books. I wasn't shaking or crying like Niagara Falls like all those girls. I just felt weird, like I was hollow, like I had ceased to exist. I didn't even know what to call the feeling because no character in a book had ever explained they felt like they didn't exist during a problematic moment.

Hrithik-anna glared at me. "I don't think I said anything funny." I've always thought the constant grin on his face was weird. But let me tell you, that grin had masked the face of Satan. He literally looked like he wanted to fry me in a lava pot. Still I tried to lighten the situation.

"Anna," I said playfully, or I hope it was playful, "you think this is funny? What are you doing? Calling me a girl and all."

The glare didn't fade.

"Oh, did you see Rohan?" I tried another tactic. Whatever I could do to make it look like I was indeed not a girl and the things he heard in the Principal's room was wrong. Hrithik-anna's face melted into a pool of disgust.

"For what?" he barked and the disgust on his face somehow managed to penetrate the hollowness I was feeling and kind of hurt me.

"For dinner," I replied, my voice subdued and weak.

He gave a monstrous laugh. "Mission, is it?" he spat.

I sighed, exasperated and took a step to leave. Who knew he was this mean?

But he was faster than me and got a grip of my collar. He pushed me against the wall, slamming my back so hard against it wall that I could feel my backbone rattle. Well, I'll blame this guy if I end up in a wheelchair. He was strangling me, but in a way that I wouldn't die. Pain ran through my body because of the merciless slamming and how he was cutting off my air supply.

My muscles started clenching because of the lack of oxygen and it felt like a ton of bricks were resting on my shoulders. Let me tell you. Don't ever believe the girls from Teen Fiction books. Slamming my body against a wall wasn't even a little near "romantic" or "hot." It freaking hurt.

Hrithik-anna's face contorted horribly as he saw my face. What was now in my face that he would look this angry? "Don't you dare," his voice clawed at my face like talons, "start the water works with me, you disgusting piece of crap."

And before realising what I was doing, I did it.

I slapped Hrithik-anna.

His hands around my neck loosened and I took that fraction of a second to escape from his monstrous hands. I scampered back till there was a good ten feet in between us.

"Uthra," he called, obviously irritated.

"Oh, or is it even your name?" he asked with a fake laugh.

"My name is Uthra," I whispered.

In the silence of the night, even the whisper sounded frighteningly loud. I wanted one of the guys to come here and save me, but at the same time, I didn't. That would mean Hrithik-anna would tell the whole dorm about my little secret. Hrithik-anna didn't bother to reply and suddenly all the guilt and fear that was flowing through my body turned into anger.

"Listen here, anna," I said, equally rude, "I can understand that you might be shocked and angry to find out my dirty secret. But by strangling me, you've crossed the line. You have no right to get this angry with me!"

Hrithik-anna's face looked ashamed just for a second. But his glare once again replaced it.

"I have every right to feel like pulverising you," Hrithik-anna said.

"Rohan does," I spat the words like acid, "not yo—"

"I am Rohan's cousin," Hrithik-anna said, interrupting me.

"And that gives you per..." my voice faltered till it turned to nothingness.

Cousin.

Cousin?

Oh my freaking god. COUSIN!?!

I tried to compare Rohan and Hrithik-anna's looks. His black eyes against anna's brown ones. His tall frame against anna's tall yet not-Rohan-tall frame. His facial features with anna's facial features.

How...?

They looked nothing like cousins. There was zero similarity.

"Cat got your tongue?" Hrithik-anna said, smirking.

I didn't bother answering. I wracked my brain for any information about Rohan's family. Now that I thought about it, I knew nothing about him other than that he was the heir of Chakravathy empire, his family are Uncle's main partners, and that their family wasn't that close with their relatives.

My knees felt weak and I collapsed. I didn't expect Hrithik-anna to run to my aid but it still hurt when he looked at me with disgust and with no amount of friendship. It actually was funny when my mind recalled all the times from the past. The first time I saw anna, the big friendly grin on his face, the genuine smile he gave me even when I was beyond rude, his arms around my shoulders numerous times, the special caring smile he gave only to me since I was the new kid and the way how his warm eyes glazed over me with a slight, almost nonexistent amused smile.

My mind automatically compared the countless smiles with this look of disgust and repulsion. And that's when the tears really started. Or at least, that's when I noticed the tears. Hrithik-anna and I weren't the best of friends who would give their lives for each other. Nor did we knew each other like the back of our hands. But we were close.

The pride in me chided me for looking this vulnerable in front of someone who wouldn't even give me a chance to explain. But something in me wanted Hrithik-anna to understand, to look at me like he used to. For a moment both of us didn't say anything to each other. We just kept looking at one another, him glaring, me staring.

"Let me explain," I said at last.

Hrithik-anna's mouth opened furiously, but then he closed it and took a deep breath.

"As the school President and this dorm's Head, I should hear my inmates out," he mumbled.

I was surprised. Like, really surprised. I was seriously expecting a snarky 'I don't want to hear your pathetic reasons' but anna was trying to be reasonable.

"Just spit it out before I change my mind!" he shouted and I cringed. His eyes twitched but he didn't say anything. So I started with my story of what happened. The bankruptcy, Uncle's offer, the disguise, the weekly reports, my father's anger, everything.

And like I expected, Hrithik-anna didn't answer. After an uncomfortable five minutes of silence, I glanced at the older boy standing in front of me.

"So...?" I whispered.

"You're stupid."

I sighed. I understood that he was angry and stuff, but I felt like he was overreacting.

"Maybe, yes," I accepted carelessly.

"You should leave," he said next.

I rolled my eyes, exasperated.

"I won't."

"You have to," Hrithik-anna said with finality in his voice, "or I'll complain to the officials."

I cackled and Hrithik-anna frowned. "This school's owner asked me to do this," I said, smirking, "go ahead and notify him." I folded my hands across my chest but instead of the shocked submission I was expecting, anna mimicked me and folded his hands across his chest while grinning.

"It won't take me two minutes to announce this to all the guys. After that what will you do? Even the Principal can't help you, sister." I felt like punching him.

How the hell was I going to get out of this? I sighed.

"Considering that you are Rohan's cousin, you must be pretty rich yourself," I stated.

Hrithik-anna nodded. "And?"

"What would you do if you were in my shoes?" He wouldn't show mercy. This was the last tactic I could use.

"Pardon?"

"What would you do if you went bankrupt?" I hissed. "What if they give you two options: disguise yourself as a girl to help a socially awkward kid in exchange for your family to lead a nice, dignified life or spend the rest of your lives in the streets or relying on the kindness of family. What would you choose?"

Something shifted in his eyes and from the look on Hrithik-anna's face, I knew I’d done it. I’d made him understand.

Thank god.

"See?" I whispered hopefully.

"Rohan loves you as his best friend," was all Hrithik-anna said.

I knew what he meant. "Know this: it all started as a mission. But he is my best friend, okay? You know why I'm not transferring back even though Rohan's doing fine now? It's because I don't want to lose him— well, not yet. Just four more months..."

Hrithik-anna's eyes softened a fraction of a bit. Just a little.

"After four months, I'll disappear from his life... forever."

The impact of the words hit me. If I told him the truth, he would hate me. If I didn't, I could never see him again. Ever. Both hurt, but I knew what was the better option. The end of our friendship was better than hate. Just four more months.

A sudden crack pulled me from my thoughts. Hrithik-anna had turned and started walking back. Not knowing what to do, I watched his retreating back.

"Just four more months. Don't forget," he called before turning around the corner.

"I won't," I whispered.

I wiped my forehead with the back of my hand. The chilly night air did nothing to soothe me as I stood in the darkness. After a moment, I sighed and started walking towards my room with an empty stomach and an even emptier heart.

I've never…

*3 weeks later*

"You have something here," Rohan said, pointing to my face.

At once I rubbed my right cheek to try and wipe off whatever was on my face.

"No, not there," he murmured, "here."

I moved my hand to my left cheek and rubbed it.

"A little above," Rohan said, smiling mildly.

I tried and in a while I was rubbing the whole left side of my face. I showed the left side of my face to him when I was finished.

"It's a smudge, I guess. It's not going," he said before taking out his linen handkerchief.

Yep, Rohan had linen handkerchiefs. I was surprised at first, too.

Soaking it with a little water, he rubbed my face.

He wiped my face.

He touched my cheek.

"Ha," he said, looking all too pleased, "it's gone."

But my stomach was doing all kinds of acrobatic stuff. I tried very hard not to touch my cheek where Rohan's linen cloth had touched it.

Maybe I was still not used to guys invading my personal space. Well... they had never touched my face before so— argh, leave it!

Jeremy, Jeremy, Jeremy, I chanted, trying to control the unbearable tingling.

I once again concentrated back to my plate when I noticed Rohit looking at us, a strange look on his face. When he found me looking at him, he gave his male version of Aphrodite’s smile and started eating again.

The mini zoo inside my stomach whenever Rohan does something, the previous drama with Hrithik-anna and with my own father, now Rohit's stare... everything was starting to freak me out, to be honest.

My life had gone from weird to weirder. I wondered when it was going to reach the weirdest part.

*

*

*

Rohan casually took my palm in his as we walked towards our room.

"Holding hands?" I barked out laughing, "seriously, Rohan?"

The big guy beside me, who had a stoic and stony exterior but a child's heart, smiled at me.

"You are so small and like a little brother that I always have this urge to hold your hand as if you're going to get lost if I don't," Rohan said, but stopped when he saw my face. I knew I was staring at him too hard and making him uncomfortable, but I couldn't stop it.

Little brother?

Seriously?

I'm not a guy, mister!

I sighed internally when I realized my reaction made it seem like I was offended by him calling me a "brother." To him, it was clear as still water that the sibling part bothered me and not the gender part. Which shook me up pretty hard. Why would I be affected?

Because you were sort of brother-zoned.

"Hey bud, did I gross you out?" Rohan asked, worried.

I couldn't give him a reassuring reply since I was a still scared from the unspoken thoughts of my mind.

"I— I'm sorry," Rohan was talking hysterically, "I'm weird. It's just, you're important—"

And hearing that one word, I snapped back to reality.

Important.

"Mate," I interrupted him, laughing. I was relieved to find my laugh sounding casual and not shaky.

"You are weird"— Rohan's not so handsome yet beautiful face fell— "but so am I."

I gripped his hand tightly as we neared our room. "And since we are one weird bunch, it's okay to do weird stuff. Okay, big boy?"

Rohan laughed. "Got it, short boy."

"Ow!" Rohan shouted as I punched his gut. "What was that for?!"

"I'm just a little lacking in the height department. Not short," I said defensively.

"That’s the definition of short," he whispered but didn't say anything further as he opened our room door.

I rolled my eyes in exasperation when I saw the guys sprawled on my room's floor. Ryan was shirtless. Rohit was in a wife beater. And a few more friends of mine were all sitting in a loose circle on the middle of our little room.

"Welcome," Ryan called lazily as we entered.

That's the thing about friends. They welcome you to your own room as if they own it.

"Why do we even have locks?" I asked Rohan with fake annoyance as I walked around to find a spot to sit in the circle.

"Um, so that I can get the feeling of actually breaking into a house— room," Ryan said and winked at me mischievously. I shook my head, smiling.

*

*

*

About one hour of us "guys" just fooling around later, there was a knock at the door.

"Yeah?" I shouted.

The door opened, revealing the last person I wanted to see in this whole universe.

Ah, great. As if my life doesn't have enough drama.

"Hrithik!" Ryan acknowledged, "You came."

Oh, so this was your work, eh, Ryan? Wait till I crush that pretty little neck of yours with my bare han—

"Yep," Hrithik-anna said and when I directed my eyes from Ryan to Hrithik-anna, I found that his eyes were looking straight at me.

Double great. Yay! And to my immense agony, he decided to sit right across from me in the circle.

He was followed by a set of his friends and soon my room was filled with guys who were trying to spend some quality time with us (yeah, that's what Karan-anna said). It was actually sweet that us, junior guys, were trying to somehow entertain the twelfth graders, since they have a neck-breaking schedule, but that sweet gesture did nothing to soothe my inner turmoil.

"Let's do something more... fascinating than talk about girls who don't even exist," Ryan declared and we all snickered.

"Then how about we play 'I've never?'" Rohit asked, seriously.

"Seriously mate?" Ryan burst out laughing, "you should really stop watching those American chick flicks."

Rohit's face turned red and though we all laughed, we decided to do it. Karan-anna took a bag of coke cans and placed them in the center. We all took one and I nudged Rohan to take one too. Right when I almost thought I had forgotten Hrithik-anna's presence opposite to me, I found his eyes on me. They weren't cold. They weren't angry or even disgusted. They simply were serious. As if he wanted to say something to me.

Brushing aside those thoughts, I turned to Shravan, one of our mutual friends, who started the game by saying he had never kissed a girl.

We all snickered shamelessly since we all were guys who still hadn’t had our first kisses. Yeah, that's us. Nothing to be ashamed of. Deal with it.

One of Hrithik-anna's friend took a shot and we all looked at him, me with shock, the other guys with curiosity.

"Um... does kissing your female teacher on the cheek when you were five count?"

We all laughed like a rowdy gang and booed but he continued. "I've never danced in front of anybody."

Ryan took a shot with a smug smile.

"Your Michael Jackson here," he said, winking as he tapped his chest and we all rolled our eyes. "I've never dressed as a girl."

Immediately Hrithik-anna's eyes fell on me and dare I say, there was amusement colouring it.

Okay, I'm a girl and I dressed like one my whole life, but I'm not accepting it. Not even in a million years.

Right then Rohit took a shot meekly.

"It was a stupid dare!"

We all laughed.

"I've never written a love letter."

Karan-anna smirked and took a drink. "Blame my preteen mistakes. Well anyways, I've never read The Fault in Our Stars."

I took a shot and even Rohan looked at me with a mischievous grin. My heart lurched forward at that smile, which confused me more.

To distract myself, I looked around to meet the teasing smiles. Screw stereotypes. "What?" I asked defensively. "It's a nice book."

"It's a cheesy Teen Fiction," Karan-anna said. "Shortie is so weird."

I rolled my eyes. "We are teens, duh."

He scoffed.

"Shortie, we are guys and guys don't do Teen Fiction. We don't roll like that."

"Who says?"

"I say."

We both glared at each other, neither of us backing down. I felt Rohan's hand on my back to calm me but instead of calming me, it gave me silent shivers. And so I did the best thing to distract myself. I argued.

"I don't know about other books, but if you know The Fault in Our Stars and have not read it yet, it means big boy is afraid to shed lacrimal fluid." I said this in my best mocking tone and shot a smug smile.

"You say I can't take a story about cancer kids? Bruv, people die. I don't cry for that!"

I let out a low insulting whistle. "Aw, cool guy indeed has some brain cells. I didn't think you had the IQ to figure out tears are indeed lacrima—"

"Lads!" Rohit yelled trying to get our attention, "we are playing this to relax so just, I don’t know, relax?"

I signed and took a shot. Guess my plan to distract myself from Rohan's platonic gestures wasn't all too great.

"I've never been..." I wracked my brain, "... on a date."

Only Hrithik-anna took a shot. We were all surprised. Hey c'mon, this is just a small town in India and going on dates wasn't our first priority.

"What?" Hrithik-anna laughed, "If I haven't been on a single date, how can I call myself a former playboy?"

I heard Rohan snort beside me and I stifled a chuckle. “Playboy” here doesn’t mean your typical I-change-girls-like-I-change-shirts type or your infamous I-get-wasted-at-parties-and-do-god-knows-what-with-random-girls type. Hell no, those things won't be happening here in the near future. So you can safely say that Hrithik-anna is your Azuma Yunoki--and please, don't ask me who he is. Just google him.

"Alright guys. Enough with those looks of disbelief. I know I'm super cool, so moving on—" anna flashed his infamous grin which was pretty much nonexistent the past few weeks "—I've never been in love."

I took my second shot and everyone looked at me as if I'd grown a second head.

Even Hrithik-anna.

Heck, even Rohan Chakravathy.

"What?" I asked, feeling self conscious all of a sudden.

"Who is it?" Ryan asked with too much enthusiasm.

"Jeremy," I muttered but then coughed.

Seriously Uthra, Jeremy? It's a guy's name and they would assume that you bat for the same team.

Great.

Yay! Perks of dressing as a guy!

Not.

"Jeremy?" they all spit out and I shook my head awkwardly.

"No no no. It's uh, Jeremy... ah, Alice. Yep. Jeremiah Alice. A girl. I call her 'Jeremy' for short. Jeremiah Alice."

"But Jeremiah is a male's name," Karan-anna injected and I had to take all the patience in the world to not smash my soda can on his head.

"Well, tell that to her parents," I shrugged trying to look as nonchalant as possible, "maybe they thought it was a unisex name. See? Uthra, used for both boys and girls...?"

To say I sounded like a total pathetic loser would be the understatement of the year. I sounded like I’d escaped from a mental ward.

"Okay," Hrithik-anna said in his authoritative voice, his eyes on me was blank save for a tiny bit of amusement. "Continue the game."

"I've never..." and the game continued.

After that little slip, my mind was occupied with thoughts of my fiancé and the love of my life, Jeremy. After a few more shots and some teasing, Rohan declared that he was tired of it. The guys agreed and took their leave, except for one freaking person.

Hrithik Chakravathy.

Rohan cocked an eyebrow when he saw his beloved (note the sarcasm) cousin standing by our door awkwardly.

"What?" Hrithik-anna asked, as he awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck.

Hrithik-anna, the epitome of confidence rubbing his neck? And doing it super awkwardly?

W-O-W.

The world was seriously coming to an end.

"That's my question," Rohan said coldly. "What?"

"C'mon, can't I stay in my old friend's room?" Hrithik-anna asked, flashing his thousand-watt smile.

"Old friend?" Rohan barked out incredulously. "We were never friends to begin with."

The emphasis on the “never” was pretty hard to ignore, and hearing that, anna sighed.

Yeah! That's my boy! Take down that Dorm Head. How does it feel to be interrogated like a crimi—

"Whatever. Can I borrow Uthra for a moment?"

Wait, what?

What. The. Hell?