Chapter 22 Feelings

Lenny's POV

I invited him to dinner and there was an awkward silence between us.... which was weird.

"So um are you guys getting back together?" I asked and Van shrugged.

Do you want to?

"Um well I just wanted you to know.... that I'm here for you." I said smiling softly and he stared at me.

Van's eyes looked dark... dead. What exactly happened between those two?

"Van..." I said softly.

Maybe I can say it.... maybe it can bring him back.

"Va-Van... I love you and want you to come back." I said but I didn't get anything out of him. "Van?" I whimpered and he got up and left.... just like that.

I blew it... didn't I?

I ran after him crying.... I'm so pathetic.

"Van!" I yelled crying but he just kept walking.

I fell down to my knees crying.

Did he even hear me....? Did it reach him? So close but yet so far.....

Van's POV

"Marion I'm glad your back." I said trying to smile, as soon as we we're home.

"It's good to sorta be back but we need to talk." she said and I gulped.

"About what?" I asked swallowing hard.

"After the divorce is final I'm moving with Robinson." she said crossing his arms.

"What...?" I asked and my mouth fell open.

She's with him... isn't she.

"You heard me." she said.

"We have a son you k-" I started to say.

"Van your still living in the past when your parents divorced, your still living in high school and I'm not. This isn't gonna work. I love you but I'm sorry." she said and I smiled.

This isn't gonna work. I'm still living in the past.

"But Marion.. I'm not living in the past, I just wish I changed some of the things I did." I said and she sighed.

"Van-" she started.

"No, you're just leaving everything. Everything we shared. Your leaving your son! Maybe I am living in the past but damn it Marion I did everything I could that I thought was best!" I yelled rubbing my eyes and my phone rung.

She glanced at it with her arms crossed. "Oh, so you get calls now?" she asked and I glared at her.

"Leave, you can leave. You runaway from life while I live in the past like it's always been." I said looking away and silenced my phone.

"Van... I'm doing this for you." she said and I laughed bitterly.

"Sure you are.... just go.... you have two hearts in your hands and you broke mine so go." I said and she hugged me from behind.

I shook closing my eyes tightly.

Don't touch me.... and I can't cry..... I don't wanna feel anything.

I pulled away glaring at her.

"You love him... you forgot all about me and Vincent." I said and she sighed picking up her luggage then left.

She just left.... after coming back.

I looked down at my phone it was Lenny.... I missed seven calls.

Don't feel a thing... don't want to....

I walked outside and Marion was standing by her car.

"You're going to him, aren't you?" she said and I ignored her getting in my car. "Realize your feelings." she snapped and I finally looked at her. "You're gay Van or maybe bisexual, but you love Len." she said but I didn't hear her and drove off.

I don't wanna love anybody again. Never ever. Forever single.