Chapter 48 Night Out
AXEL
We drove back to school in silence.
The Question and Answer session was already over when we returned to the venue so we just slipped into the car and drove away.
Nobody said anything during the drive and just like I was thinking, I was sure Lisa was thinking about the same thing, about the vulnerabilities that we both shared with each other back on the field.
We both knew we crossed a line we shouldn't cross, a line that'll blur the dynamics of our relationship but I just wanted to strike a balance, she had blurted her vulnerability out in a moment of weakness, and knowing Lisa and what she thinks of me, I was she'd always have a nagging thought at the time back of her mind that I was going to use that piece of information against her. I wasn't an unfeeling monster so there was no way I'd use that against her but she wasn't going to believe me so I had to make it a truce.
I had to tell her something about me that I'd never told anyone. I've never shared a relationship with anyone to the point of telling them my secret. I grew up with Prince so it has never been a secret
from him. Most of the soldiers and men that worked under me didn't even know of this information.
But I told Lisa Volkov because I didn't want her to feel bad.
So I brought her to get a favorite show because I wanted to make her feel better.
Something had changed about what I thought and felt about her, I knew that deep down but I didn't want to process it, I didn't want to think about it but it was there, big and like an elephant in the
wardrobe.
I was acutely aware of her beside me in the car, or eat breathes she was taking, of each movement, she was making, she was currently watching a video on her phone and even though I couldn't hear
what she was watching because she had an earphone plucked in, I knew I was something that was making her happy because of the occasional chuckles from her.
Deep and free-spirited chuckles that I've never heard from her, ones that made her seem free and young, one that made her feel happy.
I wanted that for her, I wanted to record the sound of her laughter so I could replay it for as long as I wanted.
Any time I wanted it.
I was going crazy, I was definitely going crazy.
Minutes later, I was easing the car to a stop in front of Moremi Hostel and when I turned to look at her, she had her head thrown against the backrest of the chair with her eyes closed in a deep
slumber.
Her face was turned towards me and I was surprised by how peaceful she looked in her sleep, how ethereal and perfect she looked. My hand raised out of its volition to tuck an errant strand of hair
away, giving me an even more perfect view of her face and I felt my heart skip a beat as an insane and irrational need to press my lips against her forehead.
I jumped back.
What was wrong with me? Kiss her forehead? It wasn't even... It wasn't even her lips.
Forehead. Fuck.
She stretched beside me and her eyes fluttered open slowly and she looked around to register where we were.
"Oh, we've arrived?" she asked, sitting upright, "why didn't you wake me?"
"We just arrived," I replied, my voice sounding angry to even my own ears.
"Okay," she yawned and stretched again and this time around, I noticed the effects of her stretching on the fabrics of her clothes. The fabric of her top stretched thinly, pushing her boobs against it
and making her nipple strain hard against the fabric.
My dick twitched painfully. It has been a long we've gotten real action, not that long actually but considering how Lisa and I have been at it since we started fucking, even staying three days without
sex was a painfully long period of time.
I knew we could go in for a quickie right now. I could drive to a deserted place in the school and bury myself inside her like I desperately wanted to but I didn't want our night to end like that. Having sex, fucking her brains out like I wanted to do right now wasn't how to end a day when we've exchanged deep secrets and vulnerabilities.
We were supposed to have sex, I was supposed to fuck her brains out to bring us back to normalcy, to remind us of who we were and the dynamics of our relationship but I still didn't want to do that.
I didn't want to do it.
Lisa met my eyes and I knew she was thinking about the same thing, the hunger and lust in her eyes were enough communication but I could sense that she was holding herself back as if she knew that even though fucking was the right thing to do at the moment, was still that one thing that'd taint everything we shared today.
Things that we weren't supposed to share in the first place.
"So good night," she said with a little smile on her face.
"Yeah, good night."
She still didn't open the door to step out.
"Thanks a lot for today, it's... It really means a lot."
And here we go again, blurring the lines further. I needed to do something to bring us back to normalcy.
"You've been singing my praise since morning," I replied with a teasing undertone, "and I'm afraid that with the way we're going, I might not have anything to take out on you the next time I'm fucking
your brains out."
She chuckled and her chuckle soon deepened to a full blown laughter that has my heart racing.
"Just for tonight," she joked, "I'm going to go back to my old ways from tomorrow because we can't afford to have that happen."
"You never said you loved it that much when I'm taking them out on you.
u."
"Do I really need to stoke your fragile ego by yelling how much I loved it?"
"Finally something to take out on you, the fragile ego part, I'll make sure you take it back."
"Oh God! You're so insufferable."
"Keep piling them up, Red, not like I mind anyway."
Her reply was a short laughter, one that I joined in on, and for less than a minute, we were just laughing together.
While managing to unblur the lines of our relationship, we still ended up blurring them even more.
"So, goodnight for real this time, I'll see you later."
"Yeah, sure, goodnight."
She got down from the car and I didn't stop watching her retreating back until she was out of view.
I exhaled loudly, my heart still beating wildly against my ribcage and it took me a while to gather myself and drive out of the hostel.