Chapter 1 — Why?

The girl who lay on a small bed peacefully sleeping looked nothing short of 18 summers. The room was quaint yet cosy. From the small bed, wooden closet, and cracked mirror hanging on the wall, it was obvious that the room belonged to a girl who had not been born with a silver spoon in her mouth. The wooden door, which gave the room a semblance of privacy, made a creaking sound and a woman who seemed to be in her mid-forties entered the room with her hands akimbo.

She furiously tapped the young lady, who was peacefully asleep. Hayfah groaned before turning her face in the opposite direction, yawning. Her mother yanked the bed sheets she used as a substitute for a duvet off her.

"Wake up. You ought to be at school by now, yet here you are, lazing around," the woman thundered in a voice that clearly expressed her annoyance.

Hayfah's attempt to greet her mother proved futile as she was cut short by the angry woman, "Don't you dare utter a word. I'm in no mood to listen to your foul voice. Just get off the bed this minute." That being said, the woman stomped out of the room.

Hayfah could not control the tears that threatened to fall. She was tired of her Umma’s negative attitude towards her.

'Why can't Umma understand that?’ she wondered. It was not the first nor would it be the last time her Umma criticized her.

She heaved a sigh before changing out of her nightgown. She wrapped a faded ankara wrapper round her dainty frame and made her way to the bathroom. Knowing she was already late for school, Hayfah wasted no time in taking her bath. On her way back to her room, she ran into her father, who was all set to leave for the marketplace where he sold groceries.

“Good morning Abba,” she greeted in a voice way too deep for a young and beautiful lady like her. Her father, a tall man just a few weeks shy of his 54th birthday, gazed at her with so much adoration. He was the only member of the family who was not ashamed of Hayfah’s flaws. Rather, he found them unique.

"Good morning Hayfah. Sleep well?" he asked, smiling lovingly at his daughter. The way her mother and the other members of their family and society treated her had made her his favourite. "Are your exams going well?" he further enquired.

"Yes Abba, Alhamdulillah."

He nodded and made his way out of the house.

Once in her room, she sat on the edge of her bed and carefully applied the well-known Baby and Mama petroleum jelly over her skin. It took a speck of powder, kohl, and a spritz of perfume to complete her look for the day. She smiled at her reflection on the mirror as she applied some lip balm on her lips.

Her eyes grew as big as saucers when she glanced over at the old wall clock. How could she have been so negligent? She had stayed up late to study for her exam and it had resulted in her waking up very late. She glanced over at her bed and stretched the wrinkled lines from the sheet before taking a deep breath and muttering a short supplication. She knew better than to annoy her mother, who was very engrossed in picking out chaffs from a bowl of uncooked beans.

***

Hayfah stood sceptically on the hall's veranda, fighting a mental battle as to whether or not to walk into the hall where the examination had already commenced, proctors roaming around to ensure silence and decorum as it went on. So lost in thought, Hayfah didn't notice when a tall man ambled towards her, a ghost of a smile playing on his lips.

Hayfah took a step backward.

"Are you here for the exam?" he asked, the smile on his face deepening.

Hayfah muttered an 'Innalillahi' and gulped nervously. She knew nothing could stop her from being embarrassed this morning.

She nodded a yes, her eyes gazing at anything but him.

"What subject? Geography?" he asked, a bit eager to hear her speak. ‘I wonder how melodious her voice is if she’s this pretty,’ he thought.

Much to his disappointment, Hayfah shook her head.

“Economics then?” he pressed, and yet again, he was disappointed when she shook her head in answer. “I’m not deaf, so I don’t understand sign language. You’ll remain outside till you’re ready to speak.”

She looked at him with desperation in her eyes. Hayfah knew she could only resist the tears that were threatening to fall for a few more seconds.

"Geography, sir." No matter how hard she tried, her voice was never the type to come out low and soft. Something in his heart twitched. Was the girl standing in front of him really the one who had just spoken? Muffled giggles could be heard coming from the examination hall, and Hayfah knew the laughter was at her expense. Slowly, the tears cascaded down her cheeks, and she immediately used her hijab to shield them from the man standing in front of her; she did not want him to see her weakness.

"Adyan!” a voice bellowed, “What's happening over there? Why is she out here?" the proctor asked.

“Take this,” he said, focusing his attention on Hayfah. She hastily took both the question booklet and answer sheet from him. Hayfah sat down and ruefully smiled at her best friend, who was sitting by her side flashing her a melancholic look. She looked down at the words written on the paper and got to writing. She had always been passionate about her studies.

***

Hayfah and Fareeha were walking side by side towards the school gate. Both girls were so engrossed in their trains of thought. Hayfah was the first to snap out of her trance when her petite frame slammed into something solid—or someone solid. It wasn’t just any random person but the man she had encountered earlier that morning, the man called Adyan. Seeing as the man had no intention of stepping out of her friend’s way, Fareeha made up an excuse, leaving her best friend at the mercy of a stranger.

"Look...what can I say? You're the most beautiful lady I’ve ever seen."

Hayfah gasped, shocked at the man’s audacity. When their eyes locked, Adyan softly smiled at her, calming her tense nerves. She looked into his eyes and was baffled to see a sincerity she didn’t see in most men. She smiled back at him, and Adyan would've bet his whole life that when she did, the world fell away. It was the most beautiful smile he had ever seen.

Without saying a word, she turned to leave.

“I don’t live around here, and I’ll be leaving tomorrow,” Adyan blurted, making her stop in her tracks. “May I know your name?” he asked, suddenly dreading leaving the following day.

She gently shook her head, turning down his request. He brought his thumb and index finger together to show her how little telling him her name would cost her, but Hayfah still did not budge.

"I'm begging you, please. Should I kneel down so you can see how sincere I am?" His knees bent and were moving south when Hayfah let out a gasp; he stopped midway.

Hayfah gazed at him with tears welling in her eyes. This stranger standing before her was the first male, aside from those in her family, to ever listen to her manlike voice and still want to talk to her again, to gaze at her with adoration, to make her insides burst with so much pride. Indeed, his gesture boosted her sense of self-worth. For no apparent reason, Hayfah found her mind convincing her that the stranger before her was not like the other men who had approached her in the past. He had no intention of mocking her.

“Hayfah,’’ she stated reluctantly. “Hayfah Muhammad Talha,” she gave him her full name. Without waiting to hear his next words, Hayfah left, leaving Adyan dumbfounded.

It took him a while to snap out of his reverie. By God, he was captivated by this girl. She was the most enchanting human being he had ever come across.