Laura
Jason was still kneeling before me on the floor, looking at me with. tears in his eyes and a decadent appearance. After I spoke, he got up and wiped his face, trying to compose himself.
“Well, indeed, it’s late anyway,” he said, sighing. “You can use the bathroom if you want.”
I nodded, getting up and heading towards the bathroom. After a shower, I noticed that Jason kindly left a change of clothes for me, they were his clothes since I didn’t have any spare clothes, so he had provided a blouse and some underwear that I believed he had never worn. I sighed resignedly and wore the blouse that looked almost like a dress on me because it was so big. My ex-husband was tall and had muscles, while I was small and thin, so wearing one of his blouses
was as if I were wearing a dress.
He was waiting for me in the hallway when I came out of the bathroom. “Apart from Annie’s room, this flat only has one oth room. I’ll sleep on the floor and you’ll have the bed,” he said n me blink in surprise.
Was he saying we would have to sleep in the same room togethe Good heavens… “Don’t worry, I can sleep in the living room,” I denied as best I could.
“There’s no need for that, seriously. If you’re scared that I might do something to you during the night, you don’t need to worry so much, I won’t do anything,” he said, making sure to keep me safe..
“I didn’t think anything of it,” I stammered.
“So are you coming to the room?”
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“Sure, there’s no reason,” I said, starting to walk to his room.
He had already prepared a makeshift bed on the floor so he could sleep, the bed was quite large and could certainly fit two, Jason could say he would sleep with me if he wanted, but he was being strangely kind by offering to sleep on the floor just to leave me at ease.
I lay down on the bed, adjusting myself between the pillows as I could hear the rustle of sheets behind me as he laid down on his makeshift bed on the floor. I sighed inaudibly and closed my eyes, maybe if I closed my eyes tightly I could fall asleep soon. But unfortunately, I was too nervous to sleep, sleep wouldn’t come no matter how hard I tried to fall asleep.
It was simply impossible to sleep while Jason was so close to me. I kept thinking about the things he said earlier, it was clear as water how sorry he really was for everything he did to me in the past, he was trying to make amends. He was right when he said that all the money he had couldn’t provide him with the happiness he need was feeling sorry for him. I couldn’t deny that I was terribly ter to say yes to him.
I wanted so much to say yes to him, to say that I wanted to ac him, that I wanted him back too, that I wanted him to take over daughter, and for the three of us to be a normal, happy family. Furthermore, I wanted what I wanted so much that it hurt, but everything I suffered in the past still prevented me from trusting him.
“Jason,” I called him softly. Surely he wouldn’t even hear me because he had probably fallen asleep.
“Can’t you sleep?” he asked, surprising me that he was still awake.
“Apparently you don’t either,” I replied. Everything was dead silent for a while, in my mind there was a whirlwind of thoughts as I tried to focus on what would go wrong if I let my guard down for him, but in
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reality, I was tired, I was very tired.
“When you were too anxious, you could only sleep when your head was lying on my chest,” he commented, reminding me of the past.
That was true, when I laid my head on his chest and listened to his heartbeat, it calmed me down and I was able to sleep peacefully.
“Does it still work?” He asked softly as if he was taking the risk of doing something forbidden.
I
Everything was silent again, neither he nor I moved. What would go wrong if I gave in? Surely a million things would go wrong… But I still just wanted a little peace, I just wanted a little comfort. Maybe because of all the emotional burden I had today, starting with the fight with Richard, the exhausting search for my daughter, all the cold I got outside, all the emotion from the conversation I had with Jason or even maybe it was because of the wine I drank, but All of this had left me exhausted and I just wanted to feel good and protected, even though it was a pure mistake.
So I lifted my head and looked at him, he was looking at me you want to find out if it still works?” I asked, feeling my hea rapidly in my chest. I certainly must have been flushed with embarrassment, but I continued to hold his gaze.
Do
Jason surprised me when he got up from his makeshift bed and walked over to me, lying on his back on the bed and opening his arm inviting me. I adjusted myself laid my head on his chest and closed my eyes when I felt his arm covering my shoulder automatically. The rhythm of his heartbeat was still the same, calm and continuous,
peaceful. I sighed slowly feeling the strange peace that came over me as soon as I was in his arms.
The nostalgia I was feeling was so much, I had missed him so much that it even hurt. I shouldn’t love him this much, I shouldn’t. I shrank closer to him, wanting to make that moment eternal. No one needed
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to know that I had done that, that I had let my guard down to that point. His arms around me were so strong and warm that I felt protected, I was needy and I needed him, I didn’t know I needed him. so much until I was in his arms again.
And his smell still affected me, by God, how I loved that smell. I brushed the tip of my nose against his chest, inhaling the inviting aroma that emanated from him, I slightly lifted my face to his neck and smelled more. Jason barely moved, I could feel that he was tense with my every gesture. Clearly, he wanted to touch me but was afraid. I would misunderstand.
However, my action then caught him by surprise, we were so close to each other that our faces were brushing, so a simple movement was enough for my lips to touch his and make me fall into that vice again.
Jason gasped into my lips, surprised by my boldness. He must have been thinking a lot of things at the same time, but I didn’t give him time to think anymore and deepened the kiss. I didn’t want to think anymore, I didn’t want anything more than to fall back into that sin even though I knew that my act would have terrible conseques in
the future.
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