Something snapping and breaking painfully within me. Everything I did to her, hit me like a ton of bricks and suddenly I couldn't breathe, I broke down. I don't even remember the last time I cried but I know I was young. I didn't even cry when I killed Danika, but knowing what she endured by my hands and by them suddenly crushed me.
I broke down, coming apart at the seams and I grabbed him, hugging him. I just wanted him to take it away. Take away the pain like he did when I was a boy, making everything alright because I couldn't fix this, I couldn't save her from them, couldn't save her from me.
"I know son, I know." he says, hugging me tightly while I drenched him with my pathetic crying. I must have looked so weak, but I didn't care, I just couldn't stop.
I don't know how long I was sobbing like a baby, but eventually, the tears stopped, and I pulled away suddenly embarrassed. My father grabs my face, sensing my embarrassment. Jacob in the cells behind me averted his gaze, but I knew he had seen what was on the screen, knew he felt bad for me forcing him to chain her up in the cells back home.
"Everyone breaks, but now you need to go home and be there for your mate"
"But how? How do I tell her Lucy is dead, that her child is dead? And how do I face her after what I have done?"
"Trust in the mate bond, Tyson said she is becoming restless, she is scared, Ryker. She has no wolf and no connection to anything and right now her only connection is sitting here, in front of a screen, when you should be at home with her," he says.
"I haven't finished them," I tell him.
"Take them and watch them another time if you need to, but it's time to go home," he tells me. I nod getting up. I jam everything in the box.
"What about him?" My father asks glaring at the vile man in the cell. I look at Jacob.
"Keep him alive" he nods.
"You're not going to kill him?" My father asks, shocked.
"No, but I know Amanda will," I tell him, and he nods. My stomach growls hungrily.
"Damien is upstairs waiting for you, make sure you get something to eat, and I will go get Jacob and Mathias something, Drake should be back soon. He can take over here till you figure out what you want to do" my father tells me. I nod, tucking the box under my arm and walking toward the stairs. My eyes felt like sandpaper as I climbed the stairs.
Walking outside I see Damian leaning on his mustang, a smoke between his fingers. He passes me the packet and I take one out lighting it. "You okay?" He asks, taking the box from me and placing it on the back seat. I say nothing and just hop in his car.
We drove in silence for a bit before stopping at McDonald's only to then jump back on the road. I eventually fell asleep and woke to Damien shaking my shoulder.
"Come on Alpha, we are home," he says, and I stretch lifting my head from the window. I saw that it was early afternoon, I couldn't believe we had been gone for two days. It was supposed to be there and back. I didn't expect we would find so much and now I was drained. I just wanted to go to bed and curl up and sleep, forgetting what I saw on the DVDs. Hopping out of the car. I see the front door open, and Lily comes out racing to Damien and chucking herself at him. He laughs at her actions which reminded me I needed to tell him I saw his mother in some of the videos.
"Argh, I missed you," Damien tells her, kissing her head. She sniffs him before pulling back a glare on her face.
"Have you been smoking?" She says stepping away from him.
"No aunt Lil, I was smoking in his car," I told her, and I saw Damien give me a relieved look. She would eat him alive if she knew not only was he smoking, but he also smoked an entire pack on the way home.
"You wouldn't be covering for him?" She asks, eyeing me and him suspiciously. I pull my packet from my pocket showing her, "See all me," I tell her, and she looks at me before nodding then giving her husband the stink eye, he was definitely in for it when she got him alone.
"Where is my mate?" I ask her and she turns walking over and gives me a hug.
"Inside with the kids, she asked about you a couple of times, wanting to know where you went. Tyson has been giving her those sedatives."
"Has she put up a fight over them?" Lily shakes her head.
"No, she likes the boys, and she can be a little strange around the kids sometimes, she is always watching them curiously, it is making Layla a bit on edge," Lily tells me.
"She won't hurt them; she means them no harm," I tell her.
"I know that, she has been playing with them on the swings. I think they are still out the back," Lily says.
"Want to meet this sister of yours?" I asked Damien who was quietly listening.
"Yes, I've always wanted a sister, funny how things turn out," he says to himself. We follow Lily inside and I see Tyson sitting on the couch. He comes over to me.
"Did you find her?" He asks and I shake my head, he looks at the box in my hands.
"What's that?"
"Nothing, but can you put it in my office and make sure you lock the door? I don't want Reika finding it," Tyson takes the box walking up the stairs and I walk through the living room and out the kitchen before stopping at the double glass doors. I see my mate with the kids out the back. She was pushing Amelia on the swings. The two boys were hanging upside down on the monkey bars. Lily has three kids which are triplets, Amelia, Thatcher, and Dominic. They are 12 now.