Walking upstairs I fill the bottle with cold water before putting the lid on and shaking the bottle. Walking upstairs I grab a razor blade from the drawer and the broom from the closet before breaking it and making a stake. The lengths one must go to kill themselves when immortal was ridiculous. Walking into the room. I place the bottle of wolfsbane on the bedside table, eyeing the bottle that would stop me healing knowing I had to drink it and remembering the burn it would cause let alone trying to swallow the shit down.
I twirl my homemade stake between my fingers before setting it down and grabbing the bottle and removing the cap. I tip the bottle to my lips, my lips sizzling when I hear Tates voice in my head.
"Lana what are you doing?"
"Goodbye Tate" Is all I say knowing he is too far to stop me and I had already made up my mind. I swig back on the bottle, the liquid scolding my throat making me gag and spit it out. 'Come on Lana it will hurt for a second then no more pain' I scolded myself, Tates voice screaming in my head telling me to stop and I could feel him getting closer making me panic as I tip the bottle up again, this time determined to finish the job when I feel it, a fluttering sensation within my stomach. At first I thought I imagined it and decided to ignore it, bringing the bottle back to my lips and grabbing the razor I sliced my wrists, my blood spilling onto the floor as I cut from my wrist to my elbow. I was already weakened from only drinking animal blood, my healing ability already stunted, grabbing the wolfsbane I plan to stop my ability to heal completely. When I felt the fluttering again, only this time I had no doubt of what it was as I stared down at my stomach, I could feel them, I placed my hand on my belly when I felt the slightest of nudges just as the bedroom door got kicked in. Tate's horrified face as he watches me bleed onto the floor.
"What have you done?"
"What have you done?" He screams before screaming for Elias, my ability to heal slowly letting me bleed to death. Elias comes rushing in and I feel myself fading.
"Shit" Elias screams before rushing over.
"Stay awake Lana," Tate says tapping my face.
"I can feel them" I mutter, regret kicking in as I feel myself slipping into darkness.
Tate grabs me pressing my face into his neck, my body heavy and going limp before running his claws down his skin, I could smell his blood, feel it on my face.
"Feed Lana" Tate says frantically, his hand in my hair.
"If not for me, for them" He whispers but even feeding felt like too much of a struggle, my body to heavy to move when I feel Elias' hand move under my face pulling my head back, he runs his hand across Tate's neck before jamming his blood coated fingers in my mouth. Elias fingers moving in my mouth before I feel my fangs slip out and he jerks his hand back. A growl escaping me as a primal urge kicks in and I sink my teeth into Tate's neck.
Tate flinches holding me there and I feel Elias grab my arms. "She is healing" I hear him murmurs before my surroundings become clearer, everything sharpening while I feed on him.
Lana POV
Three Days later
I have been on suicide watch for three days now, Tate removed the door handles on every door in the house, I was also never left alone by myself. If I wasn't joined at Tate's hip, I was with Elias and joined him. Though I know now, I would never attempt that again. I had a reason to live now, the two moving babies growing in my womb. I realised how selfish it was for me to punish them along with me, punish Tate. So caught up in my own head that I didn't see the impact it would have on everyone else. My family would have been devastated and it probably would have caused a war between our packs. Tate would have been destroyed and so would of our children. I wished I could take everything back, undo the harm I had done.
Getting ready for bed, I hop in pulling the covers up. Tossing and turning as I try to get comfortable in this oversized empty bed when I hear movement outside my bedroom door. Getting up, I stick my head out the door to find Tate resting against the wall sitting on the floor. He jumps looking up at me not having realised I was there until I touched his shoulder.
"Are you okay, why are you on the floor?" He rubs the back of his neck awkwardly.
"I was about to go to sleep actually" He says, his eyes darting to the wall across from him.
"Where? on the floor in the hall?" I ask wondering if he had lost his mind, the floorboards definitely wouldn't be my first choice of getting some sleep.
"I have been sleeping here for three days now, Lana" He says.
"I'm not going to do anything, Tate. You can sleep in your bed" I tell him and he shakes his head.
"I'm fine Lana, I can't sleep with you so far away, it makes Asher nervous" He says and I roll my eyes before stepping over him and walking toward his bedroom. I climb in his bed and I hear him get up, I chuck the extra cushions on the floor before moving my pillow.
"I'm not letting you sleep on the floor outside my door, will you sleep in here now?"
"I know you don't want to be in here with me" He says.
"I never said I didn't want to be in here, I just assumed you didn't want me in here" I tell him rolling on my side and getting comfortable. Tate walks over flicking the lamp off before climbing in behind me.
"Because you went to Avalon?, I was angry, well more shocked actually. I expected that of Drake but not you" He says draping his arm over me and pulling me against him.
"He isn't coming back is he?" I ask Tate.
"He will come back Lana, eventually"
"And if he doesn't?"
"Then you have me, we can be happy without him, you can be happy without him" Tate says and I nod my head. I roll over facing him.
"We can still be a family without him Lana, you me and our little ones" He says placing a hand on my non-existent bump.