Chapter 25 Chapter Twenty-Five

Chapter 25 Chapter Twenty-Five
I'm probably just being paranoid. I go back to rinsing my hair and put some conditioner in it. I stay in the shower long after I have rinsed the conditioner and washed my body. I stay in there until my skin starts feeling pruny and the water starts getting cold. 

I turn off the water and stand there for a minute letting some of the water run off of me. Stepping out I grab a towel and wrap it around myself. I dry off real quick, brush my hair and teeth and go back to the bedroom. Brad is still asleep, I grab my phone and head into the living room.

It's almost three and I feel more awake than I did before the shower. I flop down on the couch and turn the TV on, flipping through the channels to see if there is anything on this late or early or whatever it is. 

I find some stupid reality TV show to watch, in a couple of hours I will start cooking some breakfast and check on Brad if he isn't awake yet. I don't know when I fell asleep but I wake up to the sound of Brad screaming. 

I rush into the bedroom to find him struggling in his sleep almost like he's fighting someone, he's having another nightmare. 

I climb on the bed with him and shakes his shoulders. "Brad baby, wake up! Brad wake up, you are having a nightmare."

I shake him a little harder. "Brad wake up, it's me!" I say a little louder this time. 

He shoots up, almost banging his head against mine when he sits up suddenly, gasping for air like he can't breathe. I wrap my arms tight around him and kiss his head over and over repeating. "It's okay, I'm here. It's just me and you, it's okay." 

Brad clings to me tightly like he's afraid I might disappear. I rub soothing circles on his back, whispering. "Shh it's okay, take a deep breath it's just me."

He takes a couple of deep breaths and frantically looks around the room. "Makenzie he was here, someone was in here watching us." He says, panting heavily, still not able to fully catch his breath. 

"It was just a nightmare, no one was here. It's okay." I say, as I squeeze him a little tighter.

Brad scans the room again. "But it felt so real, I swear someone was in here watching me sleep." 

"No one was in here babe, it's just me and you. I promise. I wasn't able to sleep so I have been watching TV in the living room, I would have noticed if someone was here." I leave out the part where I fell asleep for I don't know how long. It was just a dream, it had to have been.

Brad takes another deep breath, his breathing returning to semi normal. "Yeah, I guess you are right. It just felt so real, I could feel someone's eyes on me, watching me." 

I give him a soft reassuring smile then kiss his cheek. "Some nightmares just feel real, but it's okay I promise it was just a dream. You can go back to sleep now if you are still tired. I will stay in here with you." 

Brad shakes his head no and gives me a forced smile. "No I'm okay. I think I have slept enough. Let's go get some breakfast or something." 

I smile. "Okay I will cook us something to eat." 

We both get out of bed and make our way into the kitchen. He sits at the table and I go through the fridge grabbing some bacon and eggs. I also grab the orange juice, pouring him a glass. 

Brad thanks me and I start cooking. While I'm cooking my mind starts wandering. I have had the same kind of nightmares before, they feel so real they make your skin crawl. Why would he be having the same type of nightmares? Last night in the shower I felt like someone was watching me and I wasn't even asleep. 

What if someone has been coming in the apartment when we are asleep or when they think we are asleep? What if we aren't as safe as I thought? Maybe we should move. My mind flashes back to Mateo and I hesitate. He should be the last thing on my mind, but for some reason moving away from here and him puts a knot in my stomach that I just can't explain. 

"Babe, babe the bacon is burning." I hear Brad's voice right behind me and I yank the pan off the burner. 

"Shit sorry." I say waving my hand over the smoking pan. 

He puts his hands on my shoulders and gives them a gentle reassuring squeeze. "It's alright babe. Are you okay?" He asks, voice laced with concern. 

"Yeah. I- I'm okay. Just a little tired, I guess." I lie, not wanting to make him worry even more than he already does. If he knew I have the same kind of weird dreams or that I was actually asleep last night when I said no one could have possibly been in here, he would have us packed up and moved out in ten minutes or less. 

I don't want him to worry about that. I'm sure we are both just exhausted and paranoid. Which is not a good mix at all. Even if I wanted to move I don't think I could force myself to actually do it. Not now that I have met someone. 

Not that me and that someone are actually together or anything. I barely even know him. I don't even know if I can trust him. I don't even know if I would want to trust him. I used to give my trust so freely, now I feel like I can't trust anyone besides Brad. How could I ever be with anyone again after everything that's happened? You can't have a relationship without trust. 

Brad wraps his arms around me from behind and kisses the top of my head. "I know baby. You really need to try and get some rest. I know you worry about me, but I'm okay. In fact how about you take a nap today and I will stay awake, holding you while you sleep. Does that sound okay to you?"

I put my hand on his and give it a squeeze. "Thank you Brad. That sounds nice. I will try and nap here in a little bit. First though, let me try and cook something edible for us."

Brad chuckles. "I can cook something for you. You don't have to cook for me."

"I like cooking for you though." 

Brad kisses the top of my head again. "Okay baby, just be careful. I don't want you getting hurt."

I laugh. "We are constantly worried about each other. Maybe that's why we don't sleep very good." I say half joking, half serious. "Don't worry though, I will be careful. Now sit down and let me cook us some breakfast."