Chapter 39 39- Do Not Let Him See You Blush
LEXI
The moment I walk into the classroom, I know that this class is going to suck. The professor is still pretending we don’t exist, pacing the front of the room like Blake and I are empty chairs. I shift uncomfortably in my seat, staring at my hands like they might magically do something if I glare at them hard enough.
“This feels impossible.” I complain under my breath. Blake pats my arm gently, the touch steady and grounding rather than distracting.
“Once we work out what you are, it will get easier.” He says calmly.
“Different species are better at different kinds of partial shifts.” He adds. I glance sideways at him.
“Like wolves and claws?” I ask, listing the one I can see most of the wolves in the room trying. He nods.
“Exactly. Wolves find extremities easiest, hands, teeth, claws. Things that are already meant for action.” He agrees.
“What about dragons?” I ask, genuinely curious.
“My eyes.” He answers without hesitation.
“They’re the easiest. Sometimes they shift without me meaning to.” He adds. I blink.
“Seriously?” I question.
“Yes.” He says quietly.
“Other parts are harder. In my dragon form they’re… Vastly different. Too big. Too much mass. Wings, scales, those take effort and control. My eyes are manageable because they already exist in both forms. The change is smaller.” He reasons.
“That makes sense. Trying to give yourself dragon wings in a human body would be… Disproportionate and awkward.” I murmur. He huffs out a soft, amused breath.
“That’s one way to put it.” He agrees. Then his tone shifts slightly, becoming more thoughtful. More focused on me.
“That’s why this task will be easier once we know what you are. There will be parts of you that align naturally. Parts that don’t need force.” He continues. I let out a slow, frustrated sigh.
“And until then, I just sit here looking like I’m not even trying.” I grumble unhappily. Blake glances toward the front of the room, where Professor Cage is still very intentionally not looking at us.
“The professor is ignoring us anyway.” He points out. I wrinkle my nose at him.
“That’s not helping.” I complain.
“Fine. Then we’ll do something else.” He says after a beat. I perk up immediately.
“Really?” I ask.
“Yes.” There’s a faint smile at the corner of his mouth now.
“We’ll make our own exercise.” He declares. My irritation dissolves into sudden hope.
“Like what?” I prompt.
“I’ll try to explain how it feels to shift… What to pay attention to. I’m not claiming I’ll be good at it though.” He says
“That’s okay!” I say quickly, leaning closer without even realising it.
“I just want something. Please.” I add, trying to remember my manners. Blake nods once, slow and certain.
“Alright, let’s try.” He says quietly.
“Well… Okay. First, close your eyes. I think that might make it easier.” Blake instructs. Trustingly, I do as he says, closing my eyes while still facing him in my seat. Without the visual noise of the classroom, everything feels a little quieter, like the world has dimmed just enough for me to notice myself properly.
“Okay. I want you to focus on your body. How it feels. Each individual muscle.” Blake continues, his voice low and steady. I nod slightly.
“Start at the top. Your jaw. Your neck. Your shoulders. Tense each area just a little… Then let it go.” He continues. I clench my jaw gently, hold it for a moment, then release. My teeth separate and I realise I’d been holding tension there without noticing. I roll my shoulders forward, then back, deliberately tightening them before letting them drop. The release feels heavier than I expect, like weight sliding off me.
“Good. Arms next. Forearms. Hands.” Blake murmurs. I make fists, feeling the tightness travel up my arms, then slowly open my fingers again. There’s a warmth that follows the release, spreading outward. I continue downward like he instructed, chest, stomach, hips, thighs, calves, tensing, holding, releasing. By the time I reach my feet, my breathing has evened out without me consciously trying. I feel grounded. Present. Like I’m fully inside my body instead of hovering anxiously just above it.
“Alright. Now work your way back up again.” Blake says after a moment. I swallow.
“This time, as you move through each part… Imagine letting it go in a different way. Not just relaxing it. Detaching from it. Like that part could change into something else if it needed to.” He adds carefully. That’s much harder. Still, I try. I start at my feet again, then my legs, slowly moving upward. As I do, a strange sensation begins to spread under my skin. Not pain. Not discomfort. Just… Awareness. A faint prickling, like static electricity or pins-and-needles, but softer. Even.
“How do you feel?” Blake asks quietly.
“Prickly, like my skin is buzzing.” I answer after a moment. There’s a pause.
“Interesting. Okay. Don’t open your eyes yet.” He says. I keep them shut.
“Try focusing on your hands. Most shifters still have some version of them. Claws, paws, talons. It’s usually easier.” He suggests. I focus on my hands, tensing each finger individually, then releasing them. I search for that same sense of detachment, that odd looseness I felt before. Nothing happens. I try again. Still nothing.
“I don’t think it’s working.” I admit, finally opening my eyes. Blake nods immediately.
“That’s okay. You felt something earlier. That means we’re not starting from nothing.” He points out. I glance at the time and blink.
“Wow… We’ve been doing this for ages.” I comment, a little surprised.
“Yes. You were very focused.” He says calmly. I hesitate, then straighten slightly.
“Okay. One more try.” I decide. He inclines his head, silent agreement. I close my eyes again. This time, the prickling sensation returns faster, like my body remembers what it’s supposed to do. Encouraged, I decide to try something different. My eyes. Not because I think I’m a dragon, obviously, but because almost everything has eyes. It seems… Universal enough to be worth a shot. I focus on them. Then, instinctively, on the surrounding area too, the sockets, my temples, my forehead. I try to let that whole region go, the same way Blake described. Ten minutes later, nothing has changed but I am starting to get a stabbing headache. Ugh. It’s an awful pressure in my eyes and temple, nothing alarming. Just a subtle tightness, like I’ve been concentrating too hard on a difficult problem for too long. I frown slightly. I guess I’m not used to focussing like this. I keep going. Minutes pass. The pressure deepens a little, spreading inward rather than outward. It’s still not painful, just noticeable enough that it’s becoming distracting.
“Anything happening?” Blake’s voice drifts in gently.
“Not really, just getting a bit of a headache. I think I should stop.” I sigh.
“That’s fine. Don’t push it.” He says immediately. I ease back, letting the exercise go. When I open my eyes, Blake is watching me closely.
“I guess today isn’t the day.” I say, trying not to sound too disappointed.
“No.” He agrees.
“But there was progress. That prickling matters.” He reminds me. Blake’s gaze sharpens slightly, like he’s already filing it away.
“And I’ll have to research what kind of shifters have a prickling feeling when shifting.” He adds, utterly serious. Despite the faint ache behind my eyes, I can’t help but smile at his information-gathering. He’s right. This is more than I’ve ever managed before. And somehow… That makes it feel worth it.
Finally, the class is over. I hop out of my chair and stretch, lifting my arms over my head until my shoulders give a soft pop. My body feels… Strange. Loose, but also tight in places I don’t usually notice. Like I’ve shaken off the tension I was carrying this morning, only to replace it with a deeper, quieter kind that’s settled into my muscles after sitting so still for so long. It’s not unpleasant. Just unfamiliar. Blake, on the other hand, hasn’t moved at all. He’s still sitting in his chair, elbows resting loosely on his knees, gaze unfocused and fixed somewhere in the middle distance. There’s a faint crease between his brows, that deeply concentrated look he gets when he’s thinking hard, really thinking, and I know from experience that if I don’t interrupt him, he might stay like this for a while. I step closer and poke his arm. Nothing. I poke him again, a little firmer this time.
“Hm.” He finally looks up. For a moment, we’re eye to eye, properly eye to eye, because he’s still seated and I’m standing directly in front of him. It’s rare, this angle. Usually he’s towering over me, a solid, immovable presence. Like this, though, his golden eyes are level with mine, sharp and intent, and the sudden intimacy of it makes my chest feel oddly tight. I smile despite myself.
“Lunch? Class is over.” I prompt gently. He blinks, then glances around the room as if he’s only just realised where he is.
“Oh. Right. Yes.” He exhales. He doesn’t stand yet. Instead, his attention snaps fully back to me, focused and deliberate.
“And if you think of anything else, anything at all, tell me. Any odd sensations. Pressure. Tingling. Discomfort. Even if it seems insignificant.” He adds, voice lower now, more serious. I nod, the seriousness in his tone impossible to ignore.
“I want to know. I’m going to do more research later, when we go to the library.” He continues. There’s no uncertainty in him. No suggestion that this might not work. Just quiet resolve, like this is already a problem he’s claimed and intends to solve. Warmth spreads through my chest. I KNOW that he insists this is mostly curiosity on his part. That I’m a mystery, a puzzle, but I can feel the truth beneath it. He’s doing this because not knowing scares me. Because he wants answers for me as much as for himself.
“Thanks Blake.” I say softly. I hesitate for just a moment, nerves fluttering, then lean forward and press a light kiss to his cheek. It’s brief. Gentle. But the reaction is immediate. I straighten, my face heating as I realise just how close we still are. Blake doesn’t move. He just looks up at me, eyes darkened with heat, his expression momentarily stunned before it shifts into something unmistakably smug. Satisfied. I clear my throat, suddenly very aware of how fast my heart is beating.
“So… Shall we go eat?”