Chapter 40

Chapter 40
Kael

I shouldn’t be feeling this way.

And yet… I couldn’t stop it.

That boy; my roommate, the one I told myself I could ignore, the one I insisted didn’t was the one I kept thinking about all the damn time.

He was… infuriating charming in ways I didn’t understand. Always flustered, always scrunching his face in a way that made my chest tighten without warning. And the worst part? I didn’t even know why I cared so much.

I knew I was straight. I’d always known. Girls didn’t make me feel like this and yet, Seth’s smile, his subtle confidence, the way he leaned over his books, pretending to study but somehow catching my gaze made me want things I shouldn’t want.

The amount of jealousy I felt every time Luca lingered too close, or even glanced at him with that sly smirk, something inside me burned. I hated it. Hated it, hated it, hated it.

I caught myself wanting to—no, needing to—assert my claim, show the world that Seth wasn’t just anyone. He was mine. I should be the one teasing him, the one holding him, the one… close.

But even after kissing,he rejected me. He chose Luca over me and that pissed me off to the extreme.

And sometimes, in the quiet moments, I wanted to kiss him not in some teasing, playful way. I wanted to do it in front of everyone. Make it undeniable. Claim him. Make him mine in the most blatant, maddening way possible.

But I didn’t. I wasn’t even sure why I wanted it so badly, or why every time Seth laughed, or brushed against someone else, or looked at Luca, a spike of possessiveness stabbed through me.

I ran a hand through my hair, jaw tight, pacing in the empty hallway.

This wasn’t just a crush. This was something… deeper. Something that made my chest tighten and my mind spin. And I couldn’t name or explain it. All I knew was I hated watching Seth so close to anyone else, especially Luca.

I leaned against the wall, closed my eyes, trying to will myself into reason. This was ridiculous. I was Kael Ashbourne. I didn’t get… tangled in roommate nonsense. And yet, here I was.

Seth was sitting at the table, innocently scribbling notes, completely unaware of the storm swirling just a few feet away from him. And I hated it that my pulse went faster just seeing him there.

I stepped closer, careful not to make a scene, careful not to let the others notice my… obsession.

“Seth,” I said quietly, my voice low, rougher than I intended.

He looked up, startled, his eyes went wide. “…Yes?”

I could feel the tension coiling tighter in my chest. “…Did you think about what happened at the party? I thought about it and I can't help myself but think you chose Luca over me. Do you… know how much I hate when you’re near anyone else?”

Seth blinked. “…What are you saying kael?”

“I don’t even know why,” I admitted,my voice barely a whisper. “I just… I hate it. Luca, River, anyone… I just… I can’t stand it.”

He froze, the pencil halfway to the paper, and the faintest blush crept across his cheeks. “Kael, this is not going to work …”

I wanted to reach out, grab him, pull him closer, make him understand without words. Make him feel what I felt. But Instead, I just stood there, heat burning in my chest, every nerve screaming.

“…Kael…” Seth whispered uncertain, almost pleading.

I swallowed hard, my heart hammering, leaning slightly closer. “…You need to stay close to me, Seth.”

Before he could respond to me River’s voice rang out from the other side of the hall“Whoa!Kael, calm down! You’re… uh…”

I froze, my eyes snapping toward River. Seth’s hand twitched, and I could feel his nervousness.

“…Don’t move,” I whispered, stepping slightly closer, lowering my voice so only he could hear. “…Please.”

Seth blinked up at me, heat crept to his cheeks completely flustered. He looked so innocent and I had one thought swirling in my mind.

I just wanted him.

Seth’s voice trembled as he tried to tug his hand from mine but fail "Kael— what are you doing?”

I didn’t answer. I just stared at him my pulse raging, and whispered back

“Tell me,” I whispered, my voice breaking in ways I didn’t recognize. “Tell me what he has that I don’t.”

Seth blinked, startled. “W–what?”

“Luca,” I bit out. “You look at him like—like you know him. Like you trust him. You never look at me like that.”

He shook his head quickly, panic flickering in his eyes. “Kael, stop. You don’t...”

“I do,” I hissed. “And it’s driving me insane.”

I stepped forward before I could stop myself, the distance between us disappearing. Seth stumbled back until his shoulder brushed the wall, breath catching. My hand landed beside his head, caging him there.

I could feel his pulse thrumming, fast and unsteady so close I could almost count the beats.

For a moment, I thought I’d lost myself completely. My thoughts were white noise, my heartbeat hammering in my throat, and all I could see was him.

“Kael, calm down!” River said sharply this time, his voice cutting through the chaos in my head.

I jerked back as if burned, realizing how close I’d gotten. Seth’s eyes were wide, his chest rising and falling too fast.

I wanted to say something—anything but the words wouldn’t come.

River stepped between us, his gaze flicking from Seth to me, something wary in his expression.

“What the hell was that?” he asked quietly. “You think no one can see what’s going on with you two?”

I froze, guilt prickling beneath my skin.

“River—”

“No,” he cut me off, lowering his voice. “You better figure out what you want before someone gets hurt. Because this?” He gestured between Seth and me. “This isn’t just a joke anymore.”

His voice cracked. “Kael, this is getting out of control.”

I knew it was. God! I knew. But I was already too far gone.

I leaned in to him again, voice low, hoarse. “Why him? Why Luca?”

River’s voice sliced through again, louder this time. “Kael. Step back.”

Seth’s eyes flicked toward River’s voice, and I finally forced myself to let go of his hand. My fingers hovered near his for a second longer then dropped.

He stumbled back like I’d burned him, lips parted, face flushed with too many emotions I couldn’t name.

I turned away before I did something worse.

I left the hallway in a silence each step echoing louder than the last. My heart was pounding, fists clenched in my pockets, trying to will my body to calm down.

Trying to convince myself that this could still be saved. That I hadn’t just completely snapped in front of him.

But I couldn’t stop thinking about the way he looked at me like he wanted to believe me, but was too afraid.

My phone buzzed in my pocket.

I yanked it out in desperation.

A message from unknown number.I tapped it open and saw an image attached.It was a photo although it was grainy, but clear enough.

It was a photo of me leaning in, hand on the wall beside Seth’s head. His face was half-turned, cheeks flushed, lips parted.

It looked like I was about to kiss him. It looked wrong.

And beneath it, a message read

"Pretty close for roommates. Should I send this to the student board? Or your father? "

I stared at the screen, my stomach dropping, cold rushing through my veins.

I knew exactly who sent it.

Juliette.