Chapter 26 FIGHTING AN INTERNAL BATTLE
CHAOS.
I leveled my gaze at Juniper, feeling the weight of the moment as I got up and crossed the room.
I nodded at the bouncer, and he stepped aside, putting her in my direct line of sight.
With each step that brought me closer to her, I caught the spark of her confidence wavering.
A subtle, barely visible hint of fear bleeding through her bravado.
It was a look I recognized. One I'd seen times before when even she knew she'd pushed me too far, testing boundaries she knew might not end well for her.
I knew I’d never lay a hand on her.
I'd never resort to violence to prove a point with a woman.
Ever.
But the truth was, sometimes, I saw that terror in her eyes. The fear that I might lose control and hurt her.
As sickening as it was to see, I didn’t stop when I reached her.
I simply grabbed her elbow and walked us both out.
I didn’t have to look back to know that everyone was watching. I could sense their curious gazes on us, but I didn’t care.
In the dim hallway, shadows danced around us as I faced her. My voice dropped to a quiet whisper, "Start talking.”
Juniper leaned against the wall opposite me, hands on her hips, a defiant glimmer in her eyes. “I don’t feel like talking to you when you’re in such a mood,” she shot back in a sharp tone.
I could feel my jaw tighten, “What’s that supposed to mean?”
She glared at me, and I couldn’t help but wonder how I had managed to keep her in my life for this long.
I mean, I wouldn’t kid myself. I kept Juniper around because, she was incredible in bed.
Let's face it, she had a body like a porn star, moves that could make a saint lose his mind. Sure, one could argue you could find good sex anywhere if you looked hard enough. But I craved the kind that came without the hassle. And Juniper always gave that willingly.
All the others before her had expected too much, wanting more than I was willing to give. But with Juniper, it started off clear. No expectations, just pure, no strings attached, hassle free fun.
Yet, here we were now, caught in this endless cycle of tension.
I’d never felt guilty about keeping things with her purely physical. As far as I was concerned, we were both using each other.
Juniper may be a princess, a high-ranked one at that. But at heart, she was just a high school girl who craved relevance more than anything else.
When people started noticing that I was spending more time with her than anyone before her, she lapped up the attention. Liked it enough to go around telling people we were an actual couple.
At the time, I didn’t bother shutting down the rumors. I knew she loved the thrill of it all, but kept it real when it was just us.
Deep down, she understood what we had was just sex. Sure, she’d freaked out a few times, her emotions spilling over like a shaken soda can. And those times, of course, I’d called it off.
But somehow, we always found our way back—A drunk night at a party, a royal event—whatever it was. One spin between the sheets and we'd be back in each others good graces.
But now, I was starting to realize it had gone on long enough. Her worldview was shifting, and I could sense she thought we were something that we could never truly be.
My thoughts shifted to Elizabeth Steinfeld suddenly for some reason.
She was my father’s mistress, and most days, I wanted to wring the woman's neck like a dish rag.
I’d fucked her twice during the periods I and Juniper were on the outs.
We might not have been a real thing, but I never fooled around with others behind her back. I found it unsavory.
Infact, I found it weak.
And that’s why I'd taken it upon myself to fuck around with Elizabeth, just to prove a point to my old man. Because I could use her to disrespect him just as even as he was using her to disrespect my mother.
The thought left the bitter taste of bile in the back of my throat, a reminder of the sick tangled web of my life.
I leaned back against the wall, feeling the cool surface press against my back. “You came here to find me,” I managed to say, my voice steady despite the storm brewing inside.
Juniper’s eyes narrowed for a moment, and I stayed watching her, unsure of what her reaction would be. But then, like a switch flipped, a lightness danced in her gaze, and she grinned wide.
Before I could brace myself, she pushed off the wall and crashed into me. Her slender arms wrapping around my waist. “You’re right,” she said, her voice soft and a little slurred. “I just missed you.” She rested her chin on my chest, looking up at me with wide, glassy eyes.
“You’ve been acting like I’m some ghost,” she sighed, “And you’ve been so distant. It’s like you’re a million miles away.”
I studied her, watching the way her eyes sparkled with mischief and vulnerability all at once.
“You’re drunk,” I stated immediately I realized it.
She laughed softly, but I could see the haze of alcohol clouding her thoughts as she rose up on her tiptoes. "Came to tell you I did you a little favor and sent that little pest running. You don’t have to worry about her anymore.”
I felt my entire body go still as I processed what she had just said.
I slowly reached up and grabbed a fistful of her hair before tilting her head back so she could look into my eyes. "What the hell did you just say?"
Juniper's smile widened in a way that had my chest tightening in anger. And so fucking oblivious to it, she continued, "She's been hiding the evidence with makeup. Weak little thing hasn't even healed from just a little cuff," she taunted, her laughter ringing in the air as she tilted her head back.
My whole body tensed up as I looked at her. I forced myself to breathe, to keep my face blank, even as her grating laughter echoed in the hallway.
I knew I had to be smart here.
Juniper wasn’t exactly stable. If she felt threatened by Merrielynn, my reaction could set things off in a way that would ruin everything.
I swallowed down the anger that was boiling inside me and leaned down, kissing her hard.
As our mouths met, I poured every conflicting emotion into the kiss, trying to push past the anger that was brewing inside me. I pressed my mouth against hers, feeling the warmth of her smile.
With every second that passed, I silently begged the moon goddess for patience.
And when I finally pulled back, I looked down at her, and instantly could tell that it worked.
“Go home." I said, my voice steady.
Her expression fell, sadness washing over her eyes. “But I want to stay."
Frustration nagged at my chest. Then I leaned down, and kissed her again, harder this time, just to get her to stop talking.
Because I wasn't sure how long I could keep pretending.
When I pulled back, I said, “Go home, okay?”
Her eyes danced between mine, searching for something.
After a moment, she nodded, but then leaned in for another kiss.
I let her have it.
She wrapped her arms around me in a hug, and I held her for just a heartbeat before I pushed away, turning toward the door. My hand rested on the handle as I drew in a deep breath, trying to calm myself down.
I didn’t open the door until she finally stopped lingering, her footsteps echoing softly down the hall. Just as she turned back, a small smile lit up her face, and she waved. I forced a smile, a tight one, gripping the door handle like it was my lifeline.
Once Juniper rounded the corner, I released the handle and ran a hand through my hair, frustration boiling in my chest. The memory of Merrielynn invaded my thoughts—just a week ago, she walked into the auditorium, her cheek swollen and bruised, the makeup barely concealing her pain. The swelling was how I'd noticed it. I remembered the way my heart dropped when I saw her, the urge to confront whoever did it clawing at my insides.
“Fuck." I breathed.
I glanced at the card room door, battling with myself.
I shouldn’t.
I stood there, shaking my head as if it would clear the thoughts swirling in my mind. Just go back in, lose yourself in the game.
Before I knew it, I was walking down the hallway, heading toward the exit.
Going somewhere I didn't need to be.
Headed to a place I knew I really shouldn't be headed to.
Funny, I guessed my legs were just as stubborn as my heart.