Chapter 23 CHAPTER 23
SERA'S POV
It's been twenty-four hours. No calls, no response to my messages and no idea where we stand.
I didn't want to accept the truth yesterday but it looked like Cara had won.
Maybe he finally looked at her as more than friends.
“You realise you're too young to have worry lines right?” Naomi asked from the window of my bedroom.
It was Saturday and instead of going shopping as we usually do, we decided to spend it at home watching movies, my family went somewhere they didn't think I would want to follow them to.
And they're right, I have no desire to move an inch from where I was squatted and I have no idea what movie Naomi had put on or what the time was.
“I'm fine,” I whisper noncommittally, barely paying attention.
“Okay, that's it. Enough moping,” I turned to see her and she was already on my body, pushing me down and she began tickling.
“Naomi! Stop! I'm ticklish!”
“That's the point, dumbass!”
Laughter uncontrollably bubbled out of my body and slowly, I could feel myself forgetting the heavy stone that was Kane on my chest.
“Okay, I'm… I'm okay now… I…”
“Promise not to ignore me while I'm in your house?”
“I –”
My phone began ringing and I flung her off me with so much power that I didn't know where it came from.
“Oh my God Naomi, I'm so sorry, I didn't know I could…”
“Damn girl, you began gymming without telling me?”
“I swear I didn't know you were that lightweight.”
“Fuck you. Answer the stupid phone, damn.”
I quickly turned to the bed and picked up the phone from where I'd been staring at it earlier.
“It's him,” I whispered, looking up at her with dread.
“The bastard. Standing you up like that. Answer, I actually want to know what his silly excuse is!”
“Hello?”
“Stop sounding like such a wimp!” She whisper-yelled. “You're supposed to be angry!”
I was just tired.
“Hey baby girl,” I heard his voice and I was honestly confused.
“You didn't show up yesterday,” I said and Naomi nodded her head enthusiastically, I was doing the right thing. Asking the right questions.
As if any answer would justify the ache in my chest, the fear that I was doing something incredibly wrong.
“I'm sorry about that my love, I got caught up in classes. All of these parties and errands my parents keep sending me have finally caught up with me academically and I just had to focus.”
“You didn't think to tell me? I got all dressed and was waiting for you.”
“Come on baby, don't nag, it's not sexy. Okay, let's do it this way. What are you doing right now?”
“I'm hanging out with Naomi.”
“Good, she'll help you dress up.”
“Dress up? For what?” My heart perked up.
“For dinner tonight at the Hamptons. Wear something short, I'll make it up to you okay?”
“But what –”
The phone beeped in my ear, he'd ended the call.
And then he sent a text, {I'll pick you up by 6}
“Well that was sad,” Naomi huffed.
“He's making it up to me.”
“Yeah, I heard. I won't say anything because I know nothing will change your mind but please be careful. Those boys have a weird vibe to them, the whole group. They use and toss girls away all the time and I won't want your heart broken like that.”
“Don't be so pessimistic, Kane is different. You don't know him like I do.”
“Uh uh. I hear you. What do you want to wear?”
She helped me shave my legs, pick a dress, put my hair up, line my lips and then lent me some of her very expensive perfumes.
“Damn, I dare say you look too good for him.”
“Haha, very funny. He's the one who's dumpster hopping with me.”
“Can you stop thinking so terribly low of yourself? Jeez!”
“I'm… sorry.”
“You're beautiful Sera. None of this matters if you're not aware of it. Your confidence comes from owning that knowledge, so stop looking down on yourself.”
The thing is, I know I'm not ugly, I know I could pass as good on the eyes when I put in all the effort Naomi did to get me looking this presentable but it wasn't my face that I had a fault with.
It's who I am.
A nobody.
Not just about being an orphan, but in every environment I've ever found myself since I turned thirteen, I've been the bottom feeder.
And if someone like me were moving to me, I wouldn't feel so inadequate.
But it's Kane we're talking about here, the hottest guy in Nashville High.
I don't know what he sees in me and I am constantly scared he'll wake up from the dream someday and cast me out.
So I'm doing all I can to preserve his attention for longer.
Maybe by the time I get to collect, I'll have a better standing as an Ivy League student and then he'll be proud to be with somebody like me.
But for now, I'm a charity case and a good perfume and gown are not enough to wipe that off.
My phone pings and I check the message.
{Meet me on the next street. Wouldn't want your aunt asking unnecessary questions}
“Or he's avoiding accountability.”
“Come on Naomi, don't be like that. He's being considerate.”
“If you insist. I'll drive you.”
“Thank you,” I hugged her, “you're a lifesaver.”
“Yes, so call me the second you feel uncomfortable. Remember you're not obligated to do anything with him. You will hightail out of there the second he tries something stupid.”
“You realise he's my boyfriend right?”
“He's Kane Ashford. You will call me the second you feel uncomfortable, alright?”
“Alright Mama bear,” I chuckle as we leave my room.
“And where are you going dressed like that?” Uncle John snapped.
“Come on John, let the girl breathe.”
I stood still as they both stared at each other, their eyes getting a strange hue to it.
I looked at Edgar, he shrugged and I took that as my cue to leave.
“Be back early Sera, we have a ten pm curfew in this house,” Aunt Kelly's voice stopped me at the door.
I nodded and got out, heading to what I hoped would be a good night.
I'm tired of being confused.
Tonight, I'll stand my ground and tell him how I feel and hopefully, he'll agree to prioritise and not disgrace me in front of my friend in hallways in school.
But deep down, I doubt he'll choose me in the way that matters and worse, I fear my anxiety will not allow me to detach from him.