Chapter 11 — Testing the Waters

"So, where actually are we going?" I was sitting next to Eric. I'd finally gotten a seat next to him on the couch while we shared dessert.

Eric had come over to me himself, and I'd been unable to say no when he'd asked me if I felt like eating something sweet. He'd been strangely hesitant, his eyes apologetic as if he'd offended me somehow. He had gotten it all wrong. 

I was the guilty one here, not him. 

We were relaxing together on the couch and sharing a store-bought mini chocolate cake. Eric was barely eating; I was the one stuffing my mouth, trying to ease my conscience.

"We're heading towards some of the smaller islands off the coast, you'll see," Eric replied to my question.

Things had become slow after lunch, and everyone had wandered off.

We were almost alone here if we didn't count Ashton, who napped on the couch in front of us with a pillow over his head. 

"We'll have a little fire, maybe some music, a barbeque; let's see what happens," He shrugged, "you having fun?" he squeezed his arm around me.

I only nodded; I was building up my courage to say what I wanted to say.

"There's something I want to talk to you about," I started.

"Everything okay?"

"Yeah, it's nothing serious." Just how did you break up with someone who you weren't even serious about? 

It had been casual until it felt like it had gotten complicated. I wouldn't even have realized it if I hadn't met Emre again.

And just how did he fit into my life?

I felt like I was at a crossroads, but both the roads ended up at a steep cliff face. It was now up to me which cliff I wanted to jump from.

I abruptly looked at myself from another perspective. You didn't break up with your boyfriend on a trip he's taken you on, in front of his friends…and especially not in front of your ex.

I quickly backtracked.

"I just wanted to say thanks," I improvised, "I haven't had this much fun in a long time."

"Hey, it's all good," he turned towards me, "I know how hard you work all the time. You deserve some time to relax."

He put both his hands on my shoulders and looked into my eyes; I hoped he didn't see the indecisions that made me want to turn away from him. He put his hand under my chin, his lips inches away from mine, and I felt nothing. 

My pulse didn't race. There was no electricity. 

Before he could kiss me or I could decide to pull away, there was a shout near us that made us jump apart in shock. 

I looked around, my hand on my heart, which was definitely racing now.

It was Ashton. He was sitting up, rubbing his face with both hands, the pillow on the ground.

He groaned.

"What happened?" Eric looked more confused than shocked.

"Crazy dream," he said and shook his head as if shaking it off, "I shouldn't have had all that cake."

Eric rubbed his neck, "I think I'll go get myself a beer. You want something?"

"No, I'm good," I narrowed my eyes at Ashton. I didn't buy it.

"What the fuck was that?" I whispered when Eric had moved away.

He raised his hands palms up and winked at me, looking a lot like Emre. 

These brothers would be the death of me.

"Let's get some air. I don't feel so good," He took my hand and dragged me away, not giving me a chance to speak. 

The sundeck wasn't empty; Melisa and Mert were sitting together in one corner deep in discussion. We didn't disturb them, and they didn't come up to us.

Eric took me to the far end of the sundeck; he leaned on the railing and looked at me.

"What was that back there?" I got right to the point. 

"What do you mean?" His expression was innocent to the point of unbelievable.

"You did it on purpose, didn't you?"

He shrugged "But why?"

"I just stopped you from doing something you would have regretted later" his tone was serious.

My mouth was open in shock.

"What the fuck, Eric? He's my boyfriend. I can choose to kiss my boyfriend if I want." 

"But you weren't sure, were you?" he shot me a knowing look.

"How would you know?"

"Admit it; you were actually glad of the excuse."

I didn't reply to that apt observation.

"Admit it," he was relentless, "You just wanted to test the water and he went all in."

"Whatever, It's still my problem who I kiss and whose kiss I regret. I angrily tossed back my hair. 

"Who are we talking about here?" his eyes had a knowing look in them.

 Just how much did he know? I averted my eyes.

"I'm not answering any of your questions if you aren't going to answer mine," I replied.

He rolled his eyes.

"Okay, shoot. What's your burning question?" 

"Why were you watching me and Eric like a creepy perv?" 

He had the audacity to laugh.

"You want one answer? It's because I've known Eric for a long time and you barely know him."

"So?"

"So, he's an asshole."

"You're what? Protecting me or something?" I felt like screaming.

He just shrugged again.

"I care about you… Okay, look, let me tell you one thing here and you're not allowed to ask me anything."

"What?" I was confused.

"Eric wasn't inviting you to this trip at all. He invited Pelin."

I just stared at him, at a loss for words.

"I don't even know if Pelin knows you guys are even together. I have no idea what Eric's told her.

He's playing you both." 

Suddenly a lot of things made sense…the way Pelin seemed to hate me for no reason, the way she seemed to hover around Eric. Oh Lord.

"Make it make sense. What did you mean by he wasn't inviting me? He invited me along!"

"I insisted on him inviting you after he'd invited Pelin. I was going to invite you anyway." He had a determined look on his face.

"What a mess," I groaned.

"You can say that again." He grinned and put his arm around me.

 "Shut up, it's not a joke," I punched him in the stomach halfheartedly.

"Don't worry, it'll all work out." 

I put my head on his shoulder; I was tired of this disastrous trip.

"Thanks," I said 

Ashton just squeezed my shoulder.