Chapter 77 Intimacy and Trust
AMELIA
Jeremy set me down gently in his bathroom. "Brush your teeth. Get ready for bed. I'll be back in a minute."
"I need to get my cane. And my nightgown."
"You don't need the cane. I'll help you. And you don't need a nightgown either." His voice was low. Heated. "You won't be wearing it for long anyway."
My face flushed. "Oh."
"Oh?" He laughed softly. "Are you—do you want this? Because if you're still too sore—"
"I'm not. I mean, I'm a little sore. But I—" I turned toward where his voice was. "I want this. Want you."
"Good. Brush your teeth. I'll be right back."
He left. I found the toothbrush—the spare he'd given me that was now mine. Brushed my teeth. Washed my face. I attempted to quiet my pounding heart.
We were going to—again. After the first time two nights ago. Yesterday, we had expressed our love for each other.
This felt different. More real.
I heard Jeremy return. Heard him moving around the bedroom. Jeremy placed his hands on my waist.
"Come on. Bed."
He guided me to the mattress. I climbed on and felt him follow.
Then his mouth was on mine. Soft at first. Questioning. But when I kissed him back—when I opened for him—it deepened. Became more urgent, and more demanding.
His hands slid under my dress. He discovered my bare skin and began to move closer.
"You're wearing too many clothes," he murmured against my lips.
"So are you."
He laughed. He retreated just long enough to remove his shirt. I heard his belt buckle and the slide of fabric.
Then he was back. Pulling my dress over my head. Removing my underwear. Until we were both naked.
Skin against skin. Heat against heat.
"Amelia." His voice was rough. Strained. "Can I—can I show you something?"
"What?" I asked.
"How to—" He paused. "How to touch me. With your mouth."
My breath caught. "You mean—"
"Yes. But only if you want to. Only if you're comfortable with it."
I'd never—I didn't know how to.
But I wanted to. Wanted to give him pleasure the way he'd given it to me. Wanted to learn and to explore.
"Okay," I whispered. "Show me."
JEREMY
I guided her carefully. Patiently. Showing her where to touch. She was shown the correct way to use her mouth the way I liked.
She was tentative at first. Uncertain. But she learnt fast.
And when she found her rhythm—when she started exploring on her own—
"Cristo, Amelia. That's—yes. Just like that."
She made a sound—pleased—and then continued.
I let her explore for several minutes. Enjoying it. Enjoying her. I appreciated the trust she required to perform this. The vulnerability.
But when I felt myself getting too close, I pulled her up.
"Enough. Come here."
I kissed her. Deep and thorough. I tasted her lips.
"Did I do it right?" she asked breathlessly.
"You did it perfectly." I positioned her on her back. Settled between her thighs. "My turn."
I kissed down her body. Found her breasts. I took one nipple into my mouth and worked the other with my fingers.
She gasped. Arched into me. " Jeremy"
I pinched gently. She moaned. Louder this time.
"You like that," I said. Not a question.
"Yes. I—yes."
I did it again. Harder this time. Her hands were fisted in the sheets.
"More?" I asked.
"Yes please."
I gave her more. Pinching. Sucking. Using teeth gently. She continued to writhe beneath me until she reached her limit. The sounds she was making were driving me insane.
"Jeremy, please. I need..."
"What do you need?" I asked teasingly.
"You. Inside me. Please."
I positioned myself at her entrance. Paused. "Last time I was gentle. This time—I want to be rougher. Is that okay?"
"Yes. Please. I want—I want all of you."
I pushed inside. Hard. Deep. This time, there was no gradual build-up.
She cried out and moaned loudly. Her body arching.
"Okay?" I asked through gritted teeth.
"Yes. God, yes. Don't stop."
I didn't stop. Drove into her again. And again. Harder than I'd planned. It's rougher than I should be with someone so new to this.
But she was taking it. Meeting me thrust for thrust. Making sounds that were half pleasure, half desperation.
"Jeremy—oh God—Jeremy—"
Her nails dug into my back. Her legs wrapped around my waist. Pulling me deeper.
"That's it," I groaned. "Take what you need. Show me what you want."
She was moaning. Really moaning. Her moans were loud enough for anyone nearby to hear.
I should care. I should be concerned about what the staff might hear. About discretion.
But I didn't care. Let them hear. Let everyone know she was mine.
I found her breast again. Pinched. Hard.
She screamed. Actually screamed. And came apart around me.
I followed her over. Spilling inside her with a groan that sounded like a prayer and a curse and her name all at once.
AMELIA
I lay there afterwards, boneless, struggling to breathe.
That was—
That was nothing like the first time. Nothing like I'd expected.
"You okay?" Jeremy asked, his weight still on me, inside me.
"I'm—yes. I'm amazing." I laughed breathlessly. "Was I too loud?"
"Maybe. But I don't care." He kissed my shoulder. "You're beautiful when you come apart like that."
"I can't believe I—that we—" I stopped. "That was intense."
"Too intense?"
"No. Perfect. Different from before. But perfect."
He shifted and withdrew carefully. He rolled onto his back and gently pulled me against his chest.
"I wasn't too rough?" His hand stroked down my back. Gentle and tender.
"No. I liked it. I liked—" My face heated. "I liked everything."
"Even the nipple pinching?"
"Especially that."
He laughed. "Good to know. We'll definitely be doing more of that."
I traced patterns on his chest. Feeling his heartbeat. His warmth. There was a slight sheen of sweat on his skin.
"Jeremy?"
"Yeah?"
"I love you."
His arms tightened around me. "I love you too. So much that it scares me sometimes."
"Why does it scare you?"
"Because love makes you vulnerable. Makes you weak. In my world—weakness gets exploited. Gets used against you." He pressed a kiss to my hair. "But I don't care. I'd rather be weak with you than strong without you."
My chest ached. "We'll figure it out. Together."
"Together," he agreed.
We lay there in the dark, wrapped around each other, both pretending we didn't have secrets.
Both pretended everything was simple.
But we were both aware it wasn't. But hoping—maybe—love would be enough.
To overcome the lies. The complications. The impossible situation we were building.
Later - 2am
I woke to Jeremy's mouth on my breast. Gentle. Soothing. Almost like nursing again.
"Jeremy?" My voice was sleepy.
"Shh. Go back to sleep. I just—" He paused. "I needed this. Is that okay?"
"Yes. Of course."
He settled back against me. His mouth working gently. His hand rested gently on my ribs.
I stroked his hair. Held him. Gave him what he needed.
Comfort. Peace. Safety.
The things he gave me every day.
I drifted off to sleep, his body still pressing against me.
Trusting. Vulnerable. Together.
For now, that was enough.
Tomorrow would bring new complications. New lies. New secrets.
Tonight was just us.
And that was perfect.