Chapter 34

GRANDMOTHER USED TO say, people die when the Lord calls them back. Truly, there is nothing to mourn about death any more than there is to mourn the growing of a flower. What is terrible is not death but the lives people live or don't live up until their death.

Am I okay? Not right now, but I will be.

Jaxon had returned a decent time later to collect his belongings and to lay a folded note upon my open palm. Warm hands found mine, jerking me out of this reverie I'd stumbled into, anchoring me to this bleaker, darker, colder reality.

"Come on," Jaxon whispered, urging me to compile my own belongings. "It's late."

I forced my eyes to meet Jaxon's brown ones. They looked dark tonight, like all the light had seeped out. Like he'd seen enough bad things to last a lifetime. These weren't carefree eyes, these were sad eyes. I knew a pair from the mirror.

"He..." I struggled to say. "He dead?"

"Looked pretty dead to me," Jaxon nodded.  

"What's this?" I asked, gesturing to the crushed note in my hand.

"A note," Jaxon replied. "For you."

I shoved it into my pocket like it was hot coal.

✖

No one tried to sugarcoat it. Couldn't if they tried.

The papers said it like it was: DuPont Corp's Heir, Elias DuPont Falls to His Death.

The next morning, the entirety of Richmond Park Academy's upperclassmen got summoned to the chapel. There were only three hundred and forty of us. We fit comfortably into the chapel, taking our respective seats organized by grade: seniors in the front section, with an aisle separating us from the juniors.

The vice-principal, in lieu of our departed principal stood patiently at the podium before the altar. I recognized some of Elias's friends sitting a row behind me. They looked like they hadn't slept.

Vice-principal Henrietta Carter tapped the microphone. I knew very little about her, but I knew she wasn't an alum like the previous principal. It was rumored, in fact, that she was the recipient of a public school education. This made it slightly difficult for her to earn the respect of the student body.

"Attention, please, settle down. I have something very sad to share with everyone this morning," the vice-principal informed in a grave voice. "I am very sorry to inform everyone that one of our students, Elias DuPont passed away last night. He, uh, fell from his window by accident. In light of this, we are looking into having grilles installed for the student accommodations."

There was a shocked silence, followed by a confused buzzing.

The vice-principal cleared her throat. "There will be no classes tomorrow. Instead, there will be a funeral service at a nearby church. Everyone is invited to attend. Shuttle buses will be provided for those interested in attending. Afterward, there will be a burial at Oak Hill Memorial Park. Shuttle buses will also be provided for those interested in attending. We ask that everyone keeps the DuPont family in their prayers during this difficult time."

Another throat clearing.

"Suicide is a very serious, and a very real problem that plagues us... not that Elias DuPont committed suicide or anything. We just urge students to reach out if you harbor any kind of abnormal thoughts. We have grief counselors on hand to assist anyone who needs help. School will conclude at noon today. Please return to your second-period classes after this meeting."

After short prayers were said from different faiths, students streamed out of the chapel with quiet trepidation, a low feeling of excitement mixed with nausea and real sympathy for the DuPonts. Seemed like nothing like this had ever happened at Richmond Park Academy before.

This was the sort of thing that only happened in television, or in public schools.

"You okay?" Jaxon asked, somehow locating me in the throng of students. He squeezed my shoulders.

I nodded. Then I shook my head. I didn't want to talk.

✖

Elias DuPont's funeral had all the trappings of an exclusive society event. The DuPont's were a high-profile American family, and Elias's death had been fodder for the tabloids. The DuPonts paid what they could to keep this on the down low, but there wasn't much they could do to begin with. This country was obsessed with the beautiful, rich and tragic.

There were a phalanx of photographers outside the Most Holy Trinity Catholic Church, waiting to get a shot of the grieving DuPont couple, along with stricken family members.

With reverence, I entered the holy place. Jaxon remained by my side, constantly asking if I was okay. The answer was the same every time - a nod. He never believed me. How could he with the blankness I wore in my eyes, or with the crushed note that remained in my left fist.

Then I spotted my father. I wasn't sure who spotted who first. The look on his face was unreadable, but he summoned me to the front, where he sat. Mother wasn't anywhere in sight. I excused myself from Jaxon, beelining to where father sat.

"Hi." I greeted.

"Hey kiddo," he greeted back, scooting aside to make space for me on the pew. None of that animosity from a few days ago. I wondered if his warm smile was in correlation with the amount of high profile people present.

"Did you know Elias?" My father asked me.

I knew I should be angry - what father did was so unfair - but I couldn't will myself to. I melted like goo in the face of father's concerned expression. I didn't need to answer my father, he knew. He took my hands in his, engulfed my cold hands in warmth.

"What's this?" He asked, noticing the way my fingers clenched around a crushed note.

I snatched my hand back, stuffing the note in my blazer's pocket.

"It's nothing."

Father frowned. "There's a trash bin by the entrance, don't keep rubbish in your pockets."

Father was right. Shouldn't be holding on to rubbish. I opened the note a final time, allowing my eyes to take in the contents of the note.

Give this to Andrea.

Hi this will be short. Thanks for being my friend and teaching me so much in the past month we've known each other. But ok I messed up and it's kinda killing me to live with what I've done. I told the student counsellor what you did and I guess some people must have overheard. They're all trying to get me but don't worry about me, I have other problems too I promise it's not all because of you.

I know what I'm doing. It's all going to end soon. I already arranged to have all my savings deposited into your bank account. Don't worry about paying me back. Goodbye and I'm sorry if I have ever made your life inconvenient. - E

Then I threw the note. Down the bin it went, along with the last of Elias's scraggly handwriting. I teared up a bit, but I swiped the moisture dry.

I was semi-glad for the closed coffin, I wasn't sure if I could handle seeing Elias's lifeless form.

As the service began, I tried my best not to stare at the framed portrait of Elias. He was smiling in it, million dollar smile on display to the congregation. It was probably a fake smile, but it didn't matter anymore.

I rose with the congregation to sing "In Christ Alone". From the corner of my eyes, I saw Darren leaving. Brief eulogies were given by Mr. DuPont after the priest recited the proper prayers. Several other students spoke, including Jaxon, who gave a moving speech. Just as quickly, the service was over.

I followed my father as he left the pew. We stopped briefly by Maxime and Valérie DuPont's side so my father could offer his condolences. I hid behind my father, neither DuPonts recognized me.

Outside the church, my father told me he was running late for a conference call. I remained motionless as he gave my shoulders a quick rub before disappearing into a black limo and out of my life.

Like he always does.