Chapter 42 — I Love You

“Sorry ma’am, Sir is busy now. I can’t let you in,” The receptionist said apologetically.

I slammed my fist on the desk angrily. “How can’t you let me in? I have been coming here for two days continuously and you are always making these damn excuses. What the hell is this? He is my husband and I don’t need anyone’s permission to go inside. Let me in.”

“P-please, ma’am, try to understand. If I let you in, then I’ll surely lose my job. I can’t go against his order,” she pleaded with me.

“Hey, Alice.” I heard a familiar voice, and it didn't take me a second to recognize her voice.

“Ava,” I said, turning around.

“What’s up?” She walked over to me with a smile plastered on her face.

“I've come here to see Henry.”

“I'm on his way to his office. He has called me and wants me there,” she said with a smirk on her face. I knew she was telling me all this on purpose to make me feel jealous. “I could have taken you there, but he has asked me alone. You know he doesn’t want us to be interrupted.”

My blood went ice cold and for the very first time, my hand was urging me to slap her beautiful face. I gulped the anger which was growing inside me and gave her a forceful smile. “Then I'll wait here.”

She frowned with slight anger on her face. “Okay, as you wish,” she sneered and headed straight to the elevator.

I walked up to the couch and plopped down and picked up the Forbes magazine, which was placed on the table. I was never interested in magazine stuff but seeing Henry’s picture on the cover of the magazine piqued my interest. He looked stunning in his black-gray suit and his both hands were in his pocket as he stood with full confidence. He had a fixed expression on his face, only his eyes were different: dark and desirous. I smiled seeing his picture. I flipped the page further while studying about him.

“Ma’am, would you like tea or coffee?” A blonde woman asked me politely.

“Um, no thanks, I’m good,” I replied.

“Hey, Alice.” Sarah popped out of nowhere and grinned, showing me her white teeth.

“Sarah!” I said, surprised to see her here because she was on her business trip. “When did you return from Singapore?”

She sat beside me and leaned her head on the chair. “Four days ago. I'm tired of the trips and need some long vacation.” She chuckled. “How are you doing?”

“I’m fine as you can see me,” I smiled weakly.

She straightened herself and faced me. “Really?” She frowned. "But I don’t think you are ok. Look at your dark circle beneath your eyes." She came nearer to me as observing my face. “And your pale skin.”

“Sarah, what are you looking at?”

“Why did you come here?”

“Um, come to see Henry.”

She didn’t say a word for a few seconds as thinking about something. “Alice, is everything fine between you two?”

I gazed at my palms as I refused to look at her. “Maybe not. I have been coming here for two days, but he constantly refused to meet me.”

She held my hands gently. “You can speak to me, Alice. I’m always there for you.”

I sighed. My mood was already sore, and I didn’t want to make it worse. “I’ll tell you everything, but not today. I’m not in the mood to speak about this shit. I’m sorry, Sarah.”

“Hey, silly! Don’t be sorry.” She gently squeezed my hand. “I can understand, Alice.” She paused for a moment. “But Henry seems sad. You know he has been working day and night non-stop. Not even a machine could work like him. He doesn’t allow anyone in his office, not even Ava.”

I frowned. Not even Ava? But five minutes ago she had told me that Henry asked her in his office.

“He needs you, Alice.”

“He needs me?” I scoffed.

“Yeah, he is missing you.”

“No, Sarah, why would he be missing me? Why would he need me? Doesn’t he have Ava?”

“Alice, are you dumb? Do you believe he is happy with Ava?” She dropped her gaze down on the magazine on my lap. “No, he is making her happy. Because he is feeling guilty. He thinks what she has been through in the last three months was his fault. Ava is happy with him, but not him! He wants you. The only person who can make him happy is you. I told you before, Alice, he likes you. I confirmed it when I found your picture on his laptop.” She chuckled. “I was shocked because he has never put anyone’s pictures on his laptop. Silly him, he doesn't even know his true feelings for you.” She placed her hand on my shoulder. “Whatever between you two please figure it out because I want both of you happy together.”

*****

I looked out of the window. The night was cool and fresh. There was no sight of the moon, but the sky sparkling with brilliant stars. I checked the time; it was 11:55 pm. Again, he didn’t come home. It was getting worse day by day. He didn’t even give me a chance for an explanation. He believed what he had seen that day.

I lay down on the bed and pulled the cover over my body. I tried hard to sleep without him but always failed. His smell, voice, caress, always chased me. I took a long breath and closed my eyes.

Thud!

I gasped in terror when the door flew open and a dark shadow appeared in my room. I quickly sat back, searching for the switch.

“B-baby.” I froze when I heard my husband. Henry stepped into the room with stumble feet. “M-my…w-wifey.” He was slurring his words like he was drunk.

Just a second. Is he drunk? He had never been drunk. I switched on the light and found him moving towards me.

I got out of bed and reached out to him. He stumbled on me. “Henry, are you okay?” I asked. He was drunk. I placed my arm around his waist because he could hardly stand on his feet.

He smiled drunkenly. “I. I’m a perfectly fine baby.” How can you be perfectly fine when you can’t even stand on your feet?

“Henry, you need some rest. Come with me.”

When I took him to my bed, he quickly hugged me. “I…I miss you, Alice,” he murmured sadly.

And my heart sank. I sighed, feeling his warmth, and hugged him back.

He pulled himself back and cupped my face, looking into my eyes. “Did you also miss me? Oh, sorry, sorry, wrong question. Did you miss Vivian?” He held sarcasm in his voice.

And my eyes popped out as I was watching him, shocked.

He shook off my hand angrily. “On that day, you two were looking damn beautiful. You were on his bed and in his shirt.” He narrowed his eyes and rage was clear in his eyes. “How does it feel when you worry about your wife and she doesn’t even bother to tell…” He didn’t complete his word and let it die on his tongue.

He wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me into his firm chest. “I’m very grateful to Vivian that he saved your life, but still, I hate him. You know how fucking I was worried about you when I heard about the firing near your school! It scared me to death. I-it reminded me of the day when I lost my sister. I-I loved my sister so damn much and second she was gone…” He shook his head, breathing hard. “And then you, the idea of losing you hurt me a million times more, Alice! I can’t lose you…”

Seeing him like that broke my heart. “Henry,” I whispered.

“Alice, you make me vulnerable. You make me fucking weak! Am I so terrible to you that you won’t even give me a call? You should have told me you are ok. You should have informed me about everything. You didn’t even think about me once?” He said heavily as if every word took away his energy.

He let go of me. “Don’t you see what you have done to me? You don’t even feel how much I want you in my life? You don’t see…” He gripped the edge of the bed, clenching his jaw hard. “Y-you don’t even see my love? My fucking love!”

And I was speechless.

He grabbed my hand and placed it over his heart. I could feel his fast heartbeat under my palm. “You don’t even feel my heart. I’m that asshole in your eyes, Alice?” He paused for a second as regaining his energy. “This is all because of Vivian, right? You love him, don’t you?”

“No, Henry, I-I…”

He quickly put his finger on my lips and shut me. “Shh! Keep quiet, let me complete first.” He gazed at my lips. “Ava has told me everything about you and Vivian. Both of you like each other. You love Harley and you are going to divorce me, right? Of course, you will. I have been treating you like shit for three months.”

His chest was rising and falling rapidly. “Fuck, it hurts me like a stab. It fucking hurt!”

He stepped up to me and grabbed a handful of my hair and kissed me hard enough that it could bruise my lips. Through his kiss, I could feel how much he was angry with me. He had never kissed me like that before. “Live your life, Alice Bennett. If you want to live with him, then just go. I won’t stop you. Just go to him and divorce me!” He growled into my face and released me. We both were gasping for breath and staring at each other. Without another word, he headed towards the door.

And I felt like someone had ripped out my heart. I couldn’t speak because I was too shocked to let out anything. He just confessed his love to me and pushed me away. He loved me and freed me from him. He didn't know anything. He thought I like Vivian and I would divorce him? How could he think that?

No, I couldn't let him go.

Before he could walk out of the room. I advanced on the door and slammed it shut behind me. “Mr. Henry Robinson,” I said firmly even though tears were still streaming down my cheeks. “Who the hell are you to decide whom should I like and whom should I live with?”

I grabbed his collar. “How could you believe others without listening to me? Why didn’t you give me a chance for an explanation? Why?”

He didn’t react as waiting for my next step.

I tiptoed to reach his lips and kissed him harshly. “You are right. I want to spend my entire life with him. I like him a lot. I can’t imagine my life without him.”

He clenched his jaw and pushed me aside. “Alice, please.”

I put my finger on his lips. “Shh! Just listen to me. Let me complete it first." I smiled sadly. "You know I always dream of him, his lips, his caress, his voice, and his eyes. I want to be his happiness and sadness. I want to be there for him in his bad and his good. I can't live without him.” Tears running down my face as I met his bloodshot eyes. “I want you to be mine, Henry.”

His eyes widened in shock.

I kissed his lips gently. “I love you, Henry. You are the first and last person in my life whom I love the most.” I waited for him to say something, but he kept quiet. “Henry, say something.”

“I-I…” He swallowed. “I can’t believe you, Alice. You and Vivian…” He closed his eyes as breathing hard.

I cupped his face. “Henry, look into my eyes.” And he did as I say, looking into my eyes. “I never thought of any other guy except you. You are the last man on earth whom I love most. I can’t live without you, Henry. I love you. Now I want you to say it back.”

He rested his forehead against mine. “I love you too, Alice,” he said deeply and affectionately.

I smiled. “Vivian and I are just friends, nothing more than that. How could you believe Ava?”

“Ava showed me your and Vivian’s pictures and you two were looking happy together so I thought you love him.”

He lost his balance and we stumbled together. “Oh my god come here.” I wrapped my arm around his waist, leading him to my bed. “Let’s get you to undress first.”

He grinned widely. “And please take off your dress…”

I took off his shoe. “In your dream. I hate drunkards.”

“But I need you naked, Alice.”

I pulled out his jacket. “Henry, please keep your mouth shut and let me do it. We had already had a long conversation and you need to rest right now. I don’t want to see you sick tomorrow.”

“Okay, kiss me.” He demanded.

I crossed my arms over my chest as I glared at him. “We have already kissed enough times.”