Chapter 22 Study Sessions (Brynn POV)
Thursday night, thirty-six hours before the chemistry exam and forty-eight hours before Alpha Hale's dinner, Harper declared a mandatory study marathon.
"You're not failing chemistry," she announced, spreading textbooks across both our desks. "I don't care if an Alpha wants to claim you or the mate bond is driving you crazy or the world is ending. You're passing this exam."
"The mate bond isn't" I started.
"Please. You can't focus for five minutes when Jaxon's in the room. Your wolf practically vibrates every time he gets close." She pulled out her phone. "Which is why I'm calling in reinforcements who can actually teach you chemistry without the supernatural complications."
"Who"
A knock on the door answered my question. Jaxon entered carrying a backpack full of study materials and a bag of takeout that smelled like Chinese food.
"Tyler said you needed help with chemistry." He set everything on Harper's desk. "And that feeding you was mandatory because you've been living on protein bars."
"I don't need" My stomach betrayed me with a loud growl. "Okay, fine. I need food."
We spread out the food and materials, creating a study station that took over both desks and most of the floor. Harper pulled up practice problems on her laptop while Jaxon organized his notes by chapter.
"Okay," Harper said, pulling up the first problem. "Let's start with the basics. Acid-base equilibrium. Explain the concept."
I launched into the explanation I'd memorized, but halfway through I lost my train of thought. Jaxon had moved closer to point at something in the textbook, and suddenly all I could think about was how his shoulder was inches from mine, how his scent cedar and something wild made my wolf stir, how the mate bond hummed between us like a live wire.
"Brynn?" Harper's voice pulled me back. "You were explaining Le Chatelier's principle?"
"Right. Sorry." I forced my attention back to the textbook, but Jaxon shifted and our arms brushed. The contact sent electricity racing up my arm and straight to my brain, wiping out whatever I'd been about to say.
Harper noticed. Of course she noticed.
"You know what?" She stood abruptly. "I just remembered I need to return a book to the library before it closes. I'll be back in... an hour? Maybe two?"
"Harper" I started.
"Study hard. Don't burn down the room. Use protection." She grabbed her jacket and was gone before I could protest, leaving me alone with Jaxon and the mate bond that made thinking impossible.
Silence fell. Jaxon cleared his throat.
"So. Chemistry."
"Yeah. Chemistry." I stared at the textbook like it held the secrets of the universe. "Le Chatelier's principle. When a system at equilibrium is disturbed, it shifts to counteract the disturbance."
"Good. Now apply it to this problem." He pointed to an equation, his hand close enough to mine that I could feel the warmth radiating from his skin.
I tried to focus. Really tried. But every time he leaned in to explain something, every time he reached across me for a pencil or calculator, the mate bond surged stronger. It wasn't painful, exactly more like being hyperaware of every breath he took, every movement, every moment when we weren't quite touching but almost were.
"This isn't working," I said finally.
"The problem?"
"The studying. The proximity. All of it." I set down my pencil. "Every time you get close, my brain stops functioning. It's like the mate bond overrides every other thought."
Jaxon sat back, putting distance between us. "Is that better?"
"No. Now I'm aware of the space between us and wanting to close it." I rubbed my temples. "This is ridiculous. We're supposed to be studying for an exam that determines whether I stay at this school, and instead I'm completely distracted by supernatural biology."
"We could take a break. Talk about the bond instead of ignoring it."
"And say what? That it's inconvenient? That I don't know if what I'm feeling is real or just magic forcing emotions?" I looked at him. "What does it even mean, Jaxon? This mate bond everyone keeps talking about?"
He was quiet for a moment, choosing his words carefully. "It means my wolf recognizes you as my perfect match. Biologically, supernaturally, in every way that matters to pack dynamics. It means I'm drawn to you in ways I can't control or explain. It means"
"That you're stuck with me whether you want to be or not."
"That's not how I'd put it." He moved closer, closing some of the distance he'd created. "It means you're mine and I'm yours. That's not a burden. That's a gift."
"A gift that complicates everything. Your father wants to claim me. The blood debt says I owe your pack servitude. And meanwhile, we're supposedly mates, which should mean something but apparently doesn't override pack law." I stood, needing to move. "So what does it actually mean? In practical terms?"
"In practical terms?" Jaxon stood too, following me to the window. "It means I can't report you to my father even though pack loyalty says I should. It means I lie awake at night worrying about you. It means when Cole tested you in the lab, I wanted to rip his throat out for putting you in danger."
"That's just protectiveness"
"It's more than that." He turned me to face him, his hands gentle on my shoulders. "It means that when you're scared, I feel it. When you're in pain, I ache. When you're happy which hasn't happened nearly enough lately I feel like I could take on the world." His thumbs traced small circles on my shoulders. "It means you matter more than pack law, more than my father's expectations, more than anything I was raised to believe."
"But it doesn't change reality. Your father still wants to claim the blood debt."
"No. But it changes how I respond to that reality." He stepped closer, until we were sharing the same air. "Without the mate bond, I would have reported you the second I recognized what you are. I would have brought you to my father in chains like he ordered. But because of the bond, I'm choosing you. Every day. Every moment. Even when it costs me everything."
"What if the bond is just making you think you're choosing me? What if it's manipulation disguised as destiny?"
"Then I'm okay being manipulated." His hands slid from my shoulders to cup my face. "Because real or magic or some combination of both I don't care. I know what I feel. And what I feel is that you're worth fighting for."
"Jaxon"
He kissed me before I could finish the sentence.
It wasn't gentle or tentative. It was desperate and hungry, like he'd been holding back for weeks and finally couldn't anymore. His hands tangled in my hair while mine fisted in his shirt, pulling him closer even though we were already pressed together.
The mate bond exploded between us. Every nerve ending lit up, every sense amplified until I couldn't tell where I ended and he began. His heartbeat thundered in time with mine, our breathing synchronized, our wolves recognizing and claiming each other in ways our human minds were still trying to understand.
He backed me against the wall, one hand braced beside my head while the other settled on my waist. I gasped at the contact and he deepened the kiss, tasting like desperation and need and everything I'd been trying not to think about.
My hands found their way under his shirt, feeling the warmth of his skin and the rapid beat of his heart. He made a sound low in his throat that my wolf responded to with approval and want and mine.
"Brynn." My name came out rough when he finally pulled back enough to breathe. "We should stop."
"Why?" I pulled him back down, not ready for this to end.
"Because if we don't stop now, I won't be able to." His forehead rested against mine, both of us breathing hard. "And you have an exam tomorrow. And my father's dinner Saturday. And about a thousand reasons why this is a terrible idea."
"Name one good reason to stop." My hands were still under his shirt, feeling his muscles tense beneath my touch.
"Because you deserve better than making out in your dorm room while the world falls apart around us." He kissed my forehead, then my cheek, then the corner of my mouth. "Because when we do this really do this I want it to be because you chose me, not because the mate bond made you want me."
"What if I'm choosing you right now?"
"Are you? Or is this the bond talking?" He gently untangled my hands from his shirt, holding them between us. "I need to know that what you feel is real. Not just supernatural biology."
"How do I know the difference?"
"That's the problem. You can't. Not yet." He stepped back, putting space between us that felt like miles. "But I can wait. However long it takes for you to figure out what's real and what's magic."
My phone rang, the sound shattering the moment. I grabbed it from the desk, seeing a calendar alert: CHEMISTRY EXAM TOMORROW 9 AM - FINAL STUDY SESSION TONIGHT.
Reality crashed back. The exam. The dinner. Alpha Hale. All the impossible complications that came with kissing the son of an Alpha who wanted to enslave me.