Chapter 195: Test The Waters
My vision blurred. The words seemed to swim on the screen when I read the email.
Isabella Crawford's death was not simply the result of enemy wolf poison. The real killer was Caelan Blackwood.
"No. No, no, no."
The phone slipped from my numb fingers. I scrambled to pick it up, forcing myself to keep reading.
When I finished reading, the room tilted. I pressed my back against the wall, trying to anchor myself to something solid.
I doubled over, dry heaving. The baby kicked hard, as if responding to my distress.
This can't be true. Lucian was lying. He had to be lying.
But why? What did he gain from this lie? He was already dead.
And the details... they're so specific. So vivid.
I thought about every conversation I'd had with Caelan about my mother. How he'd always seemed slightly uncomfortable when she was mentioned. How he'd quickly change the subject.
No. I'm reading too much into it. He's uncomfortable because he knows how much I miss her.
But what if...
The sound of a car engine in the driveway made my blood freeze. Caelan was home.
I struggled to my feet. The email was still open on my phone screen.
I quickly closed it and set my phone on the nightstand, then grabbed a broom and swept up the shards of the glass that had shattered on the floor.
I need to act normal. I need to think about this rationally.
This is probably all lies. Lucian's final attempt to hurt us from beyond the grave.
But I need to look at Caelan's face when I ask him. I need to see his reaction.
Footsteps on the stairs. Getting closer.
I turned off the lights and dove under the covers, pulling them up to my chin. My heart pounded so loud I was sure he'd hear it from the hallway.
The bedroom door opened with a soft creak.
"Sabi?" His voice was gentle, careful not to wake me. "You asleep?"
I kept my eyes closed, fighting to control my breathing.
The bed dipped as he sat on the edge, carefully removing his shoes. I felt him trying not to disturb the mattress as he undressed.
The same hands that hold me so tenderly... could they have held a bloody dagger? Could they have hurt my mother?
The covers lifted as he slid in beside me. His arm came around my waist, pulling me gently against his chest.
"I love you, Sabi." He whispered the words against my hair, his voice full of such tenderness it made my heart break.
How can someone who loves me this much have killed my mother?
But how can I ignore what I just read?
Hot tears slid down my cheeks onto the pillow. I bit my lip to keep from sobbing aloud.
His arms tightened around me immediately.
"Sabi?" His voice was soft, concerned. I knew that he felt my overwhelming sadness from our mate bond.
Before I could react, he was turning me over to face him. I squeezed my eyes shut, hoping he'd think I was still asleep, but it was too late.
His hand reached across me, fumbling for the bedside lamp switch. The dim amber light filled our bedroom, and I knew there was no hiding anymore.
I heard his sharp intake of breath.
"Oh God, Sabi..."
I'd been crying for who knows how long. My face was soaked with tears, my eyes swollen and red. I bit down hard on my lower lip, trying desperately to stop the sob building in my throat.
My eyelashes were wet and clumped together. I must have looked like a mess.
Caelan sat up immediately, pulling tissues from the nightstand drawer. His hands shook slightly as he gently wiped my cheeks.
"Baby, what happened?" He stroked my hair with his other hand. "How long have you been crying?"
I couldn't speak. The tears just kept coming, silent and relentless. I shook my head, unable to form words.
"Are you feeling sick? Let me check..." He pressed his palm to my forehead, checking for fever.
"No temperature... is the baby kicking too hard? Does your stomach hurt?"
I shook my head again, another sob escaping despite my efforts to hold it back.
"My darling, you're scaring me like this... did you have a nightmare?"
He pulled me into his arms, and I let myself sink into his warmth. For a moment, I almost forgot about Darrell's call, about that terrible email.
"Are you hungry? I can make you something right now... warm milk? Pasta?"
"No..." My voice came out hoarse and broken. "It's not that."
"Then what is it? Pregnancy anxiety?" His large hand rubbed circles on my back, the same way you'd comfort a child.
I noticed his breathing gradually calm as mine started to steady, but fresh tears continued rolling down my cheeks.
He'd clearly been studying pregnancy books. "I remember reading that emotional swings during the second trimester are completely normal... should we see the doctor tomorrow?"
I slowly pulled back from his embrace, wiping the remaining tears with the back of my hand.
"Feeling better?" he asked gently.
I nodded. "Yeah... much better."
"Are you sure? You don't need me to do anything?"
I shook my head. "No..."
"Can you tell me what that was about?"
I adjusted my position, sitting cross-legged to face him directly. When I looked into his eyes, I made sure to study his expression carefully.
"I... I was thinking about Mom."
His eyebrows drew together slightly. "You mean Isabella?"
"Yes... I guess it's because I'm going to be a mother myself now."
I paused, watching his reaction. When I mentioned Isabella's name, I caught it—the way his gaze flickered away for just a split second before returning to mine.
"I keep wondering what kind of advice she would give me if she were still here."
A smile spread across his face, warm and genuine. "She would definitely tell you that you're going to be the most wonderful mother in the world."
"Do you think so? Did you know my mother well?"
His fingers unconsciously gripped the bedsheet, then he reached over to stroke my hand instead. "If you miss her... I could take you to visit her grave sometime."
"You'd do that?"
"Of course. I know how much you miss her."
He seemed to hesitate, lost in thought for a moment.
"Caelan, how much do you actually know about my mother?"
"I... I know she was an exceptional Gamma."
"I mean about the war where she died."
The tension in the room suddenly shifted, becoming thick and electric.
"War?" The word came out too quickly, almost defensively.
"Yes. Do you know what happened back then?"
Another pause, longer this time. "Not... not really."
"But you must have heard about it. It was a major battle."
"I only know... only heard it was a Rogue attack."