Chapter 30 Chapter 30
Chapter 30 Chapter 30
Sebastian’s pov
Darkness wrapped around me like cold hands, pressing against my chest, suffocating me, dragging me down into a pit I had long learned to fear.
I didn’t know if I was standing, falling, or drowning. My mind was a storm of screaming echoes. Voices I had tried to forget clawed at me ,some pleading, some accusing.
“Sebastian… run.”
“Why didn’t you protect us?”
“Save yourself…”
And then I saw her—Avery.Ten years old. Her small hands clutching her teddy bear, smiling up at me.
Her smile twisted into terror in an instant. Shadows of men I couldn’t fight, screams I couldn’t stop, her cries breaking me into pieces again. I tried to reach her… I tried to save her… but I was small, powerless, helpless.
Then her voice faded into another, a softer voice—warm, grounding, familiar:
“Sebastian… come back.”
It was Lily. Her presence cut through the darkness like sunlight through storm clouds. She was gentle, patient, pulling me from the edge of myself. I tried to grab her, but I couldn’t. She was there in the dream, yet just out of reach.
Her hands, her voice, her calm… it saved me.
And then I woke.
The room was quiet, too quiet. My chest still heaving, sweat on my forehead, my mind trying to catch up to reality. Morning light spilled in, soft and warm.
Lily.
She was there. Asleep. Her head resting gently near my arm. The calm on her face was a stark contrast to the storm I had carried in the dream—and in my life—for so long.
For a long moment, I just stared.
She had saved me in the dream. And here she was in reality, innocent, peaceful, unaware of how close she had come to being caught in my darkness.
Guilt clawed at me. Slowly, I reached out, gently lifting her into my arms. She stirred once, murmured softly, and went back to sleep. I carried her to my bed, laying her down carefully, tucking the blanket around her like she was the most fragile thing in the world.
I lingered for a moment, just watching her breathe. Her presence was light. Calm. Safe. Everything I hadn’t allowed myself to feel in years.
I pushed myself up and moved through the motions, my mind still replaying the dream. I showered, dressed carefully, trying to appear human again, while inside, the weight of yesterday and my past pressed on me. I called the maid to prepare breakfast, then instructed my secretary to buy me fresh clothes—something to remind myself I could still live in the world outside the storm in my head.
When Lily finally awoke, she blinked sleepily, startled, then quickly sat up.
“Sir… I—this is not right. I shouldn’t—”
“Lily,” I said softly, my voice calm but firm. “Don’t worry. Nothing is wrong.” I handed her a fresh outfit. “Go and bathe. When you’re done, come and eat.”
She froze. “Eat… with you?”
“It’s an order.”
Her mouth snapped shut. I saw the faintest blush on her cheeks, and something inside me thumped uncomfortably.
Minutes later, she joined me at the table, still careful, still cautious, still luminous in her quiet presence.
We ate slowly, almost ceremoniously, the silence stretching in tension. Finally, she looked at me, her voice soft, hesitant.
“Sir… what happened yesterday? Why… why did you get so angry?”
I sighed, heavy with the weight I had carried for years. “I owe you an apology first. You shouldn’t have seen that side of me.”
“Sir—”
“No, Lily. Listen. I need you to understand.”
I looked at her, the soft morning light catching her hair, the warmth in her eyes grounding me even as my chest ached.
“My sister… Olivia. She was… taken from me. Raped, beaten, and killed. She was ten years old.”
Her hand went to her mouth, her eyes wide.
“I… left her to get her teddy bear. She asked me to go. I didn’t think it would… end this way. Since that day, I have blamed myself. Everyone else blamed me. I blamed myself.”
My hands shook. I took a deep breath.
“That guilt… it became a storm I couldn’t escape. I wanted revenge. I chased it for years. I chased it through drugs, through pain, through nights I couldn’t sleep. PTSD… anger… madness. All of it comes from that day.”
Her hand reached mine, warm and solid, and I felt a strange, grounding calm in her touch.
“And yesterday,” I said quietly, “I received a message from the men who did it. The Venmo Crew. The same men.”
Her eyes widened, fear mingling with concern.
I recited the message:
“I see you are digging into us. Stop now or you’ll lose your secretary Lily and even your beloved Victoria. If I had known you would still want revenge, I wouldn’t have only raped and killed her. I would have harvested her organs and sold them. Stay back, Sebastian. Last warning.”
I swallowed hard. “That message… triggered everything. My anger, my pain… yesterday, I lost control. I’m sorry you had to see that. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
“You’re not a monster,” she said firmly, placing her hand on mine.
My chest tightened. That hand… it was something I had longed for without knowing it. Something I didn’t deserve.
I paused, then asked quietly, “Lily… did I kiss you yesterday?”
Her eyes widened. “No, sir. You fell asleep.”
“Oh.” I exhaled shakily. “I’m a sleepy head.”
She giggled softly. “You really are.”
“Should I kiss you now?” I teased lightly.
“What?! That’s… too expensive!”
“I’m joking,” I said, smirking.
We shared a small, quiet laugh. Then she shifted. “Sir, I need to see my mom at the hospital.”
“I’ll have Drey go with you,” I said.
“No need, sir.”
“It’s needed. You will go.”
She relented. “Okay, sir.”
I handed her my card and instructed, “Buy fruit. Anything your mother needs. I insist.”
“I can’t accept this, sir. It will be double debt.”
“Not debt,” I said. “Consider it compensation for what you did for me yesterday. Accept it.”
She hesitated, then nodded.
“Be safe… darling,” I added softly.
She froze, then whispered, “Yes… sir.”
As she left, I watched her go. Lily. Lily. Lily.
Different from anyone else. She could calm the storm in my head. She could stop my madness. She could… save me.
And for the first time in a long time, I wanted to talk to her again.
I texted Drey:
“Tell Lily to come after she’s done. I have something to show her.”
He replied instantly:
“Okay, sir.”