Chapter 15
“You are still visible,” Queen Bogen said.
Kip’s hiding place behind a heavy blue curtain made him crave fresh air with mind-screaming urgency. Until now, he’d never thought of himself as a claustrophobe. Never thought of himself as a spy either, yet there he stood, squished between wall and curtain, waiting to eavesdrop for the queen. To add to his troubles, the curtain smelled of dust. If he sneezed and gave himself away, the queen might send him to the dungeon. When a door creaked open, he pressed his back tighter against the wall.
“What sort of military exercise was that just now?” Queen Bogen’s voice boomed. “Knocking the royal guard on their bums!”
“That was epic out there!” Winnie’s excited voice easily reached Kip’s ears. “I just showed you the—”
“Anyone else would have been executed for such an effrontery.”
He almost choked on his breath. Could she do that?
“I just showed you how weak your army is. You’re welcome.”
“They are mel-yew.” Next came the slapping sound of webbed feet on the marble floor. Kip assumed she was pacing.
“Your Highness.”
Winnie paused. He guessed to take a calming breath.
“If they can’t keep their own balance, how can they fight the lurkin?”
“The mel-yew have defended this realm since the Bogen reign began,” said the queen. “Before you came here and tossed them willy-nilly, they were doing rather well.”
Kip wondered if her faith in her army might be misplaced. According to the history book he’d perused, the Bogens had reigned only during peaceful times.
“They are our royal guard. If we command it of them, they will fight and succeed.”
No response from Winnie.
“Do you disagree with us?” Queen Bogen said sharply.
What had Winnie done now? Had she rolled her eyes? Grimaced?
“No, Your Majesty.” She almost sounded contrite. “Obviously, they’re trained to fight to the death. All I’m saying is they wouldn’t have to die if they got help from stronger fighters.”
“We have discussed this matter with you before. Vogan are royalty and do not fight. The palm are simple beings incapable of defense. We have no other subjects.”
Kip contorted his face to prevent the dust from tickling a sneeze out of him. Why couldn’t Winnie say she was sorry and leave so he could breathe again?
“Your Majesty, if you think you can win a war with the army you have, you’re making a huge mistake.”
He groaned inwardly. Why did the ruddy girl always need the last word?
“We do not make mistakes of any size. And one more thing. Did we or did we not order you to remain on castle grounds this morning?”
“I don’t think so.” Now Winnie sounded huffy.
“We distinctly recall informing you that Commander Fynn went to the watch post to look into things. You disregarded our order and went there all the same. Why?”
“I flew with the wig get birds.”
The announcement surprised him. They didn’t seem strong enough to carry anything heavier than a mel-yew.
“I thought the only reason you didn’t want me to go was because it took too long.”
“Your thoughts on why we give an order are of no consequence,” Queen Bogen said. “You’ll do as you’re told with no arguments. The rank of general does not give you the authority to go about doing as you jolly well please, flying off in all directions, tipping over the royal guard. If everyone did that, we’d have utter chaos.”
“Sorry,” Winnie muttered.
A wave of relief rippled through Kip’s insides. Finally, an apology.
“Sorry?” the queen bellowed.
His muscles tightened again.
“You are the most impertinent general we have ever encountered. Leave our sight before we have you thrown back into the dungeon!”
Stomping feet, then a door slam.
“She’s left, Master Wizard.”
He stepped from behind the curtain and took a deep savoring breath of cool air.
“You and the general are of the same world?”
He nodded.
“You don’t sound alike.”
“Same world, just different accents, Your Majesty.”
She gazed out the window. “Do you have feelings for her?”
“She’s a bit arrogant,” he said with a shrug, “but she’s all right. Mostly.”
“Then your job, Master Wizard, is to keep close watch over her. Protect her from herself. We cannot allow her to continue to undermine our authority. If she defies us one more time…”
He straightened to attention. “You can count on me, Your Majesty.”
“Good. And as a precaution, keep practicing your vanishing spells in case we need to make the general disappear.”
He tried to look indifferent, but his face must have betrayed him.
The queen’s eyes blazed. “If you haven’t the courage to obey our will—”
“I’m at your command. In the meantime, why don’t I keep her out of trouble for you?”
Queen Bogen nodded. “She should be meeting with her little band of councilmen now, Master Wizard. You may ‘keep her from trouble’ by attending that meeting. She’s been given Conference Room Seven.”
He bowed. “Yes, Your Majesty.”
“We’re on our way to Meeting Chamber Four ourselves, making banquet plans for the pre-hunt. You may report to us there.”
“As you command.” He bowed again and strode out.
Winnie’s conference room barely held one table and the seven plush chairs that surrounded it. Her little band, as the queen called them, occupied every seat except for the one at the far end of the table.
Kip flashed what he hoped looked like a winning smile. “Don’t mind if I sit in, do you?”
Winnie merely shrugged.
He eased along the right side of the table, past a voga page and a mel-yew monk, to the vacant chair opposite Winnie. “If you need any advice, I’ve got it in spades.” With a whoosh, the ace of spades appeared between his thumb and forefinger.
She groaned and looked away. A few of her “councilmen” clapped until the voga page, seated at Winnie’s right, glowered.
Once the room fell into silence, the page turned to Winnie. “General, with your permission I shall introduce your staff.”
She smiled. “Go for it, Loy.”
“Seated directly across from myself is Freeden.” He waved toward a mel-yew child on Winnie’s left. Kip had never seen him before.
“He likes to be called Cubby,” Winnie said.
Loy hesitated. “As you wish, General. Beside, er, Cubby is—” He grimaced. “—Polo, the court’s jester.”
The little comic, dressed today in bright green, stood and bowed.
Ignoring the palm seated on Polo’s other side, Loy continued, “On my right, we have Brother Mapes of the Brothers Ky. At the far end of the table is our Master Wizard.”
Taking that as a cue to perform, Kip pulled a red silk scarf from his fist.
“No magic.”
With a shrug he returned the silk to the inside pocket of his robe.
“And lastly, as it should be,” Loy said, “I introduce Pall, the lowly palum.”
Winnie leaned forward to examine the creature’s horsey face. “That’s not Pall.” She sat back. “The stripe down his nose is too wide.”
Loy spoke in a stage whisper loud enough for Kip to hear. “If you please, General, they are all named Pall. Makes it easier for them to remember.”
“They all have the same name?”
“Yes, General,” said Loy. “You’ve caught the gist of it straight away.”
“Doesn’t that get confusing? I mean, what happens if there’s a whole herd of them and one of them wants somebody’s attention?”
“They were born confused, General,” he said. “Besides, what does it matter what happens when palm are amongst themselves?”
“Just curious.”
Kip pressed his lips together to keep from smiling. As annoying as she could be at times, he found her curiosity appealing. And he rather liked the way her uniform showed off her figure.
“Pall, what do you do if somebody calls your name when you’re with your people?”
“If called, good General, I should come forward.”
“But you all have the same name.”
“Excuse me, General?” Kip said. “I expect it’s a bit like shouting fire in a crowded theater? They would—” He cleared his throat. “—stampede.”
“Oh. I guess we won’t do that.”
“A wise choice, General,” said Loy. “Shall we get on with the meeting?”
“Exactly, I just talked to your queen.” She made a sour face.
Loy’s frog face wrinkled into a haughty sneer. Had the queen ordered the page to report on Winnie’s meeting? If that was the case, he’d better step in and save the situation.
“What the general clearly meant to say,” Kip said, “was she just spoke with our illustrious queen.”
She glared at him. “Is she your girlfriend now?”
He bristled.
“As I was saying, the queen doesn’t think her royal army needs help fighting the lurkin.”
Loy’s shoulders stiffened. “Our queen is never wrong.”
“She doesn’t know the enemy the way I do.”
Loy’s eyes narrowed. “Forgive my contradiction, General, but no one has seen the enemy. Not even our oracle.”
“I have, and they look like fifties sci-fi spiders. I saw them in a dream.”
“Are you barking mad?” Kip cried out. “Dreams don’t count.”
“They do here. See what I’m wearing?”
He did and appreciated it, but she clearly was not in the mood for appreciation.
She tugged at her tunic. “I dreamed I wore this. It looked exactly like this. Polo sang a ballad about Bogen of the began in the same dream. Almost everything I dreamed came true. If I say I saw man-sized spiders attacking the castle, then that’s what’s going to happen.”
“You said almost everything. Which bit wasn’t true?”
“When the lurk in attacked, they kind of marched to…” Her voice faded to an inaudible mumble.
He held a hand to his ear. “Sorry?”
Only slightly louder, she said, “ ‘Ride of the Valkyries.’ ”
“There we are, then.” Kip slapped the table in triumph. “That can’t happen. Nobody in this world knows our music.”
She stared hard at him. “The dream was right. I know it.”
He fell against the back of his chair and shook his head.
“Master Wizard,” Loy said, “perhaps you know a spell that could restore the good General to sanity.”
Kip let out an amused snort. He had to admit she sounded a bit bonkers.
“What would anybody here know about sanity?”
Loy gasped. “General. How can you—” The rest of his words were drowned out by boisterous music, blasting from a speaker near the ceiling.
Kip recognized the tune. He hadn’t known it by title, but it definitely originated in his world.
Winnie shot from her chair. “Battle stations. We’re under attack!”
Her staff responded with wide-eyed stares. Kip didn’t care about them now. He hurried after Winnie. After all, he’d promised Mikey he’d help her. If monsters were truly attacking, she needed his magic.