Chapter 179 The Joy of Fatherhood

Chapter 179 The Joy of Fatherhood
Theron’s Point of View
It had been six hours since Eden had given birth, and a full day since we’d arrived at the hospital. I had spent much of that time pacing the corridors, waiting outside while the nurse completed their check-ups and other procedures, I was barely able to stand the helplessness that ate me up.
Finally, after what felt like an eternity, Eden was moved to the postnatal ward.
She looked pale, drained and tired.
She was no longer cursing or trembling, no longer wincing through the intense pain, but she was exhausted and weak, seeing everything made my chest tighten with guilt.
I hated myself for putting her through this.
“Do you want to hold the baby?” she asked suddenly, her voice quiet but firm.
I froze. My throat went dry, unsure what to say. I shook my head. “No.” I answered.
Her eyebrow arched, a little teasing but sharp. “Why not? You’re her father. You should hold her too.”
I ran my fingers through my hair, still trembling from both excitement and fear.
“I… I don’t think I deserve to hold her,” I admitted, my voice a little shaky. “It just feels like it’s not my place.”
For the first time in my life, I felt a fear unlike anything I’d ever known. Not the fear of failure, not the fear of loneliness, not even the fear of death, but fear because I love.
And even after six long hours, I was still unable to recover from the shock.
There was this woman I loved more than anything; more than my life, and I would give her the world, even my own head, if she asked for it. And yet… I had seen her writhing in pain, screaming, crying, and I had stood there powerlessly.
I couldn’t help her. I couldn’t take the pain away. I couldn’t make any of it stop.
And I was the one responsible.
I just stood there, watching, I wanted to support her, to do something...anything, but I couldn't, the only thing I could say were only a few words.
Words that probably didn’t matter.
Words that didn’t change a thing.
It felt a little hypocritical to want to hold the baby, the guilt in my mouth tasted bitter and ugly.
It’s so selfish to want to take her from Eden when I had contributed so little, it was unbearable, but still… still, I wanted to hold her.
“Theron…” Eden’s voice called softly, and my eyes snapped up. My angel was smiling, her face glowing despite the paleness that lingered. “Come to me, please.”
I did.
Just like she ordered.
On my fucking knees, I moved toward her.
I didn’t have any right to strut towards her, out of total respect for her effort, I want to grovel as much as I can.
“What are you doing?” she asked, her voice tinged with surprise.
“Nothing,” I muttered, barely able to form words.
She held our daughter in one arm, the tiny girl still asleep, and with her free hand, she brushed through my hair, her touch gentle and forgiving.
Just letting me see her face was enough for me. I bit down on my lip, fighting back a desperate urge to cry.
She is so beautiful and so innocent.
I felt something stir deep in my chest; something primal, something very natural, that had been in my core from the beginning.
Thea's existence alone triggered me; she made me want to protect her, made me want to be better for her, made me want to be a good person.
A better human being. A father worthy of her.
“She looks just like you,” I murmured without thinking, my voice low, filled with awe. “I love her already.”
Eden laughed softly.
“I wanted you to see her eyes before she fell asleep,” Eden whispered, holding our daughter carefully now, wrapping her snugly in the soft shawl. “They’re just like yours.”
Then, with a gentle smile, she extended her arms toward me, urging me to take her.
“Eden, I… I can’t,” I admitted, my voice trembling. My fingers shook even as I reached toward her. “I honestly can’t.”
“You should,” she said softly, her eyes warm and patient. “Your uncertainty will vanish the moment you hold her. She’s your daughter, Theron. Proof of how much we love each other—and she’s beautiful.”
“How do I… hold her?” I asked, feeling awkward, afraid I might break her. She seemed so fragile, so small.
Eden guided me patiently, her hands steadying mine, helping me cradle her. And the instant I held her close, a calmness washed over me.
Air rushed inside my lungs.
And tears welled in my eyes as I stared down at her perfect little face.
“I never imagined there would be a day like this,” I confessed, my voice catching. “You… our baby… and me—together. A family of my own? Everything feels so surreal.”
I swallowed hard, my fingers tightening gently around the baby.
“I promise you, Eden, for the rest of my life, I will be dedicated to you. And I swear, I will make sure these pretty eyes never cry because of me again.”
With my other hand, I reached for her cheeks, feeling the soft skin of her face, and the tears finally broke free, and without shame, I cried.
Tears of joy.
There was a loud sound as someone burst through the door. Instinctively, Eden and I both turned toward the entrance, and I immediately recognized them—Father and Lola.
I glanced back at our baby. Thankfully, she was still asleep.
“Shh!” I snapped, a little annoyed. “She’s sleeping.”
Father approached slowly, a heavy grin on his face. “I came as fast as I could,” he whispered, his voice trembling slightly with excitement. “My goodness, Eden… congratulations.”
He reached out and held her hands, pressing gentle kisses onto the back of them. I could see the genuine happiness shining in his eyes.
I don’t remember the last time I had seen him like this joyful.
Perhaps it was when Thorne and I were still little boys, running around in the backyard with those cheap, thrifted water guns he had bought for us. He would let us shoot him endlessly, laughing as the water soaked him completely, and he would either proclaim Thorne or me the winner.
It had always confused me—why did he keep losing on purpose?
Now, watching him beam at Eden and the baby, I think I finally understood. There are things you just do when you’re a father, without a doubt, I was certain I wanted to keep losing to Thea.
No matter how simple or easy the games I play with her are, I was always going to let her win.
Did father feel this way when mom had me? Did he cry? Was he filled with such unrealistic amount of joy?
“What is it?” he asked, eyes flickering between Eden and our daughter.
“A girl,” I answered simply.
“Lovely!” he squealed, practically bouncing with excitement. “I’ve always wanted a daughter. Who would’ve thought you’d get exactly what I’ve always wanted? Let me hold her, please.”
“I just carried her,” I argued, gripping her a little tighter, and moving her away from his reach. I wasn’t about to hand her over just yet.
“Come on, don’t be so selfish,” Lola chimed in with a laugh. “Let her have a feel of grandpa, too.”
“No,” I said firmly. “I’ll give her to you when I’m done looking at her. If you want a daughter so badly, you can have her then.” I paused, a sly smile tugging at my lips. “I guess that’s impossible… because you’re too old.”
Eden laughed again before she suddenly grabbed underneath her stomach, wincing.
“Ouch,” she murmured.
“Are you okay?” I asked in concern.
She nodded, still smiling. “Yeah… I think I laughed too hard.”