Chapter 20
My tears continue to fall as I absentmindedly stir the thick gravy. My heart aches for so much loss. It should never have come to this. There were so many bodies. So much blood. So many lives gone in the span of minutes. I know I’ll never forget the horrible and tragic sight from this morning. Why did it have to come to this? Was I so wrong in wanting to be loved? Ashton. My heart aches for him. I’ll probably never see him again. I’ll never forget how he stood up for me, even to his father.
Alyssa pulls the pot of gravy from me and pours it into a serving trough. “You fell for the Beta? I wonder he wasn’t at the battle.”
I wipe at my sodden face. “He was imprisoned. His own father threw him in the dungeon.” I choke up thinking about Ashton. How could Alpha Meyers be so cruel as to imprison his own son, his heir even? Ashton tried to tell him, but he refused to listen. Maybe Alyssa is right, and stubbornness and pride are to blame. Who am I kidding—none of this would’ve happened if I never followed that tunnel.
“You keep your wits about you. Don’t go thinking things what could’ve been different. Can't change it now, girl. Take this out to serve.” Alyssa points at the serving trough. I grab a serving spoon then follow behind her to the dining room. She loads the tray of eggs into the basin then goes back into the kitchen for the biscuits. I place the gravy and the spoon then turn back to the kitchen.
I’m jerked around; my arm is nearly yanked out of the socket. Hunter drags me to the center of the dining room. His grip is so tight around my arm that I cry out. He chuckles but continues to draw me forward. He releases me into a crowd of grieving family members of the slain. Their somber faces stare at me in anguish. I have no idea why I was brought here, so I look to Hunter, not meeting his eyes. “These pack members all lost loved ones today. Your stupidity brought the Canyon Ridge Pack to our gate this morning. This is all your fault, you pathetic little tramp. What have you to say for yourself?”
I step forward and look around at all of the faces. Peter stands at the back with Weston at his side. His sorrowful eyes lock with mine, so I speak to him directly. “I can’t change what happened today, but I grieve alongside you.”
Peter’s jaw quivers. He closes his eyes, trying not to lose control. His eyes open, wet with fresh unshed tears. His jaw clenches then he turns to leave, dragging Weston along with him.
Pain pierces my heart. I just lost my only friend. “Peter. I’m so sorry. Please, forgive me,” I think to myself since I’ve never had a pack mind-link. I want to rush after him, but I know that would be a lost cause. I wipe my eyes as I look back to all of the grief-stricken faces. I don’t know what they want to hear from me.
When my father left, the one question that I had was: why? Is that what this mob needs to know? I swallow my hurt and speak to the crowd. “I was careless and went where I should never have gone. As you all heard, I was with their Beta. I never did cross the line, not even when I saved him from drowning. I found a companion in him that I never had here.” Ashton. I found a love in him that I’ve never felt before. Because of me, he’s sitting in a dungeon right now. I wonder if he’s being blamed for the war, just as I am? I clear my thoughts and continue to speak. “I have always felt alone in this pack—not even my mate wanted me. So I found comfort elsewhere, and because of that, Alpha Meyers brought his warriors to attack us.”
The crowd parts, and Alpha Greg barrels toward me. “You are to blame for your recklessness. You coerced with our enemy and brought them down on us.” The mourners murmur in agreement. “You’ve been an outcast your whole life, yet you blame us for that. We are not responsible for your treatment. If you would’ve known your place and behaved, you might have been better off. None of this would have happened.”
Shock overwhelms me. If I had behaved? I did everything I’ve ever been told to do. I’ve never done anything to anyone. I had a total of one friend. One person that believed in me, and I just lost him. Wait, Ashton believes in me. He’d want me to stand up for myself. I know this isn’t my fault alone. I can’t hold back any longer.
“I have done nothing but serve this pack since the age of six years old. I have been your slave. I have been beaten and tortured based purely on the mood of the Alpha, Luna, and Beta. My behavior has had nothing to do with my treatment. I wasn’t an outcast because of my own actions. I was a child, innocent to this world.” I brace myself for the backhand from Alpha Greg. I remain standing, but I hold my face and spit out the blood. I wipe at my nose. He glares at me, but I don’t hold back. “You could’ve handed me over; instead, you chose to fight. All of this could have been avoided. I’m not the only one to blame in this.”
The crowd looks around in confusion. I guess they never thought to question the almighty Alpha. They never wondered why their loved ones had to go to battle in the first place. Alpha Greg growls deep in his chest. “This is the thanks I get for protecting one of my pack.”
His statement confuses me. One of his pack? I’ve never been one of his pack. I’ve only ever been a meager slave to him. In protecting me, we lost hundreds. Why didn’t he turn me over? I look back over the slew of faces. Alyssa is standing outside the kitchen door, watching with her arms crossed over her chest and her head held high. Her eyes tell me to keep going.
“Protecting the pack slave in exchange for hundreds of warriors and their mates doesn’t seem like a very fair trade, does it? I accept my role in this situation, although I never broke any laws. But Alpha Greg is not entirely blameless.”
A hand grips my hair and yanks my head backward. Hunter’s fist connects with my face. My head buzzes, and the world goes blurry. I hear my pulse beating in my ears. I blink a few times, and my vision clears enough for me to see Alpha Greg’s red face as he points at me. The ringing in my ears slowly dissipates to the point that I can hear one word screamed directly in my face. “Banished." I’m hit again, and it knocks me to the ground before everything goes dark.