Chapter 11 CHAPTER 011
Asher tries to stop his hands from shaking as he sits and waits in Principal Selene’s office while Ms. Rina sits across from him.
He presses his palms together tightly, fingers digging into his skin like that alone might steady them, but it doesn’t help much. The tremble is still there, and the more he tries to tell himself to stop, the stronger it gets.
He keeps his eyes on the floor. He doesn't dare to look around, doesn't dare touch anything.
What if it burns too? What if he hurts another person? What if Professor Dalen does not survive? Asher would be a murderer. Asher would be kicked out of here, and he would have no place to go.
His stomach twists violently, and he feels like throwing up.
“Try to breathe, Asher.” Ms. Rina chimes in on his thoughts, but Asher shakes his head.
He can't breathe. What if breathing too much sets another person on fire? What kind of monster is Asher that even a home for freaks would not want him? Is he cursed? What type of freak is he?
“No, you're not cursed."
Asher snaps his head up to Ms. Rina, eyes widening. “Can you read my mind?”
She shakes her head immediately. “No, I can’t read your mind. There’s no such ability. You’re thinking out loud.” She gives a small smile.
Asher swallows hard.
“You should stay calm,” she adds gently, reaching out to pat his back, but Asher jerks away so fast before she can touch him; the chair scrapes lightly against the floor.
“Don't touch me.” His voice breaks, unfamiliar to his own ears. “I don't want to hurt anyone else,”
If Asher could fear himself, he couldn't begin to imagine what's going on in another's head when they look at him. Do they consider Asher a nuisance to society?
“I didn’t mean to,” he mutters under his breath.
“I know,” she says softly, but it doesn’t change the fact that Asher might be a monster. Ms. Rina looks at him with pity, but before she can say anything else, the door opens, and Principal Selene enters, and Asher’s entire body goes cold.
The woman strolls over to her chair, a stoic expression on her face as her gaze immediately goes to Asher, who looks anywhere and everywhere but at her face.
“In a single day, you burnt a class and a professor almost to death, and here I thought having Xavi around was bad enough,” she starts, and Asher flinches. He feels terrible.
“I-I-I'm sorry. He touched me when I told him not to. I lost control. I didn't mean to hurt him. I know I'm not fit to be in the academy. I'll leave.”
He'd better leave before they kick him out. It would hurt less; he would be less pathetic.
“No one is going to kick you out. The academy is meant for people like you. Besides, you're not the first person to kill someone, and you won't be the last."
Asher's breath catches in his throat as he looks at Selene with horror. "Is...is Professor Dalen dead?"
Selene shrugs. “I don't think he will make it, and even if he does, he would be hideous and without skin. That should teach him not to molest another student." She intertwines her hands and leans across the table, pinning Asher with a stare. “You will no longer be training with the other students until you have at least learned how to control your emotions. You will be training with Ms. Rina for the main time. It appears my professors aren't strong enough for your fire. A fire elemental burnt to the skin by the same fire he controls is pathetic, but that's a discussion for another day. You can return to your room, Asher.”
Asher doesn't move from his seat. He continues to stare, expecting more. Expecting to be yelled at, scolded, hit, and called a monster because Asher deserves all of that, but none of his expectations are met. Instead, the principal looks at him with a questioning brow as he refuses to leave.
“I-I-I can go?” He stutters, and both women nod.
“You acted out of self-defense. I can't punish that,” Selene states.
Asher slowly nods, and then he sluggishly lifts himself from the seat, and without another word, he drags his feet out of the office.
~~
Asher’s hands still tremble when he pushes the door open to his room, and the moment the door clicks shut behind him, the weight of everything crashes down on him all over again. Everything flashes in his head, taunting and mocking. It won’t go away.
His breathing turns uneven, chest rising and falling too fast, like he just ran miles instead of just walking down a hallway.
He doesn’t even realize he’s trembling harder until he hears the sound of his name.
“Asher?”
Asher lifts his head to find Rase standing close, so close that it immediately reminds him of Professor Dalen invading his space.
In a single day, Asher has shown the world the kind of monster that he is. A monster that's not accepted even in a home of monsters. He's pathetic. His parents are right; he's a walking disaster that should stay far away from where humans live.
Asher instinctively takes a step away from Rase.
“Hey, hey, what happened? Were you scolded by Principal Selene?”
Asher wished he were scolded; he would feel less miserable. He tries to speak, but nothing comes out. His throat feels tight; he feels like he can't breathe. “I—” His voice cracks and his body trembles.
That’s all it takes for Rase’s expression to shift immediately into one of worry. “Shit,” he mutters, then grabs the blanket from his bed and wraps it around Asher’s shoulders without asking.
Asher stiffens for a second but doesn’t pull away this time. He doesn’t have the energy to. “Sit,” Rase says gently, guiding him down onto the bed, and Asher sits, his hands shaking around the blanket.
Immediately, Ori and Kaeleen surround him, both of them asking if he's alright, while Rase disappears for a second, then comes back with a mug, warm steam rising from it.
TO BE CONTINUED.