Chapter 87
“I took the subway today,” Bethany explained. “I have a nail in the back tire, remember?”
Leaning on the countertop, Dana sat on one of the bar stools hidden beneath it. “So what’d she have to say? I can’t believe she’s thrilled to hear about the sudden outbreak of weddings happening up in Boston.”
Bethany gave Dana a sardonic eye roll over her shoulder. “That’s the understatement of the year. I had called to see what dates might work for her and Dad, you know. If they’d be coming up for your graduation, and maybe we could go on up afterward or before…”
“Bethy, God.” Dana pushed her hair from her forehead with both hands, weary at the thought of the coming conversation. “Why’d you even bother? Don’t you get it? She doesn’t like me. She thinks I turned you gay. She isn’t coming up to see me graduate, and she sure as hell isn’t going to want to see you throw your life away by marrying me. It’s a lost cause. I know she’s your mother, but she fucking hatesme.”
Dana expected an angry comeback of some sort, or maybe a half-hearted contradiction, but Bethany surprised her with another sigh. “Yeah, I know. You’re right. I just thought…I mean, whenever I talked about marrying Terrance, she always said she wanted to watch me walk down the aisle. I thought that meant whenever I got married, to whomever I loved. Not specifically to him.”
“Well, if I was a guy,” Dana suggested, “maybe she’d be cool with it. You know, we don’t haveto do it. I mean, we’re still young.”
Bethany glanced up at her. “I’m tired of waiting, aren’t you? Don’t you wantto marry me?”
“I do,” Dana assured her, “but if it’s going to cause this much trouble with your mother—and God, I haven’t even told my parents yet—then why even bother? I mean, it’s only a piece of paper, right? It doesn’t change how much I love you, or you love me. It doesn’t change what we are to each other. So what’s the big deal?”
“Don’t you wantto get married?” Bethany asked. “Call me your wife?”
Dana shrugged. “As long as we’re together, it doesn’t matter to me what we call each other. I. Love. You. End of story.”
Pulling out one of the chairs at their small kitchen table, Bethany sat down, head in her hands, and sighed. “Well, for me, I’ve always wanted to get married, for as long as I can remember. When I was a little girl and used to play with Barbies, my favorite thing was to dress them up and stage mock weddings. Even before I had any Ken dolls, I’d make the Barbies marry each other.” She laughed, a short, bitter sound. “I’m surprised my mother doesn’t remember that.”
Dana folded her arms on the counter and set her chin on her hand to look at her lover. “Not me. One, I never liked Barbie. I got a doll once and cut off all her hair just to see what it looked like underneath—I seriously thought it’d grow back—and after that, my mom wouldn’t buy me anymore. I always knew I liked women, always, as far back as I can think, so I was never one of those girls mooning over boys or writing down Mrs. So-and-soin her notebooks, or fantasizing about marrying some cute actor on TV. When I was older, I knew women couldn’t marry other women so I didn’t hold out any hopes of getting hitched. I didn’t want children, I didn’t want domestic bliss. I wanted some exciting, adventurous life like the ones I read about in the books I loved.”
Bethany laughed again. “Instead you got me.”
Slipping off the bar stool, Dana came into the kitchen to step up behind her lover’s chair. She leaned down over Bethany and wrapped her arms around. With a tight hug, she kissed Bethany’s temple and said, “Yes, I got you. I got the life I wanted, this one, here, and I wouldn’t trade it for the world. I don’t care if you want to call yourself my girlfriend, or lover, or wife, or some term of endearment not even thought up yet, but you’re my everything, and nothing, nothing, will change that.”
Bethany patted Dana’s arm where it rested around her neck. “I love you so much. It’s just that…I know you don’t care one way or the other, but I’ve just always wanted to get married, that’s all.”
“I thought you said you wanted to do it only to make your mother accept me,” Dana said.