Chapter 34: Fractured Bonds

Chapter 34: Fractured Bonds
What the fuck had I just done?

The question kept spinning through my head as I tried to stand. My legs shook, barely able to support my weight after whatever that poison had done to me. But I couldn't stay here. Not with Lucian looking at me like that, all confused and apologetic.

"Chloe, wait." Lucian moved to help me, his hand reaching for my arm.

I jerked away. "Don't."

The word came out harsher than I meant it, but I didn't care. I couldn't let him touch me right now. Couldn't think straight when he was so close.

I stumbled toward the door, using the wall for support. Each step sent tremors through my legs, but I gritted my teeth and kept moving. Stubborn. That's what Marcus had called me, and he was right.

Roslyn appeared in the corridor carrying a tea tray. The moment she saw me, her eyes went wide. She took in my swaying stance, the broken plates on the floor behind me, and immediately dropped the tray.

The porcelain shattered against the stone floor, tea spreading in a dark puddle.

"Miss Chloe!" She rushed forward, catching me before my legs gave out completely. "What are you doing out of bed? You should be resting!"

"I'm fine."

"You're not fine. You almost died!" Her hands were gentle but firm as she tried to support my weight. "Let me get you back to bed."

"No." I shook my head, even though the movement made the hallway spin. "Take me to my parents. Or someone. Anyone."

"Miss Chloe—"

"Please."

Something in my voice must have convinced her because she nodded, adjusting her grip to better support me as we started down the corridor.

We'd barely made it ten feet when Marcus rounded the corner.

"What the fuck are you doing awake?"

His voice stopped me cold. I looked up and the guilt hit me so hard I couldn't breathe.

Marcus looked terrible. His grey eyes were dim with exhaustion, dark circles underneath like he hadn't slept in days. His hair stuck up in places where he'd been running his hands through it. The worry written across his face was so clear it hurt to see.

This man had nearly died protecting me. Had confessed his love in the middle of a battle. Had stayed by my bedside while I convulsed from poison that might have killed me.

And I'd just kissed his brother.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, tears burning my eyes. "I'm so sorry."

Marcus was at my side in an instant, lifting me out of Roslyn's arms like I weighed nothing. His hands were gentle despite the panic in his voice.

"What's wrong? Are you in pain?" He looked past me down the corridor. "Where the fuck is Lucian?"

I went rigid at his name. "Don't. Just... don't."

Something flickered in Marcus's expression, but he didn't push. "Where do you want to go?"

"My room." The words came out small. "Please take me to my room."

He adjusted his hold, cradling me against his chest as he started walking. I knew I shouldn't feel this way. Knew it was wrong after what I'd just done. But being in his arms felt safe. Like maybe everything would be okay if I just stayed here.

The tears came harder, soaking into his shirt as exhaustion and guilt and confusion all crashed over me at once. I cried silently, not wanting him to know. Not wanting to explain why.

His heartbeat was steady beneath my ear. Strong and constant and real.

By the time we reached my room, I'd cried myself into an exhausted sleep.

\---

When I opened my eyes again, both my parents were hovering over me. Relief flooded Mom's face the moment she saw I was awake.

"Thank the Goddess," she breathed, reaching out to brush hair from my forehead. "What were you thinking, walking around like that?"

Dad stood behind her, arms crossed. His expression was caught between worry and frustration. "You could have collapsed. Hurt yourself even worse."

I looked down at my hands, unable to meet their eyes. The guilt was still there, heavy and choking.

"Did you have another argument with Fiona?" Mom asked gently. "She's been in her room all morning. Won't talk to anyone."

My chest tightened. "I'll sort it out."

"Chloe—"

"Please. I just need some time."

They exchanged one of those parent looks that said they didn't believe me but would let it go for now. Dad kissed my forehead before they left, making me promise to actually rest this time.

The days that followed passed in a haze. I moved through them without really being present, the guilt eating at me from the inside.

Marcus came by on the second day to take me for a walk. I'd been avoiding Lucian completely, making excuses whenever he tried to check on me. I thought I was being discreet about it.

But Marcus noticed everything.

"You're avoiding Lucian," he said as we walked through the garden. Not a question but a statement.

"I'm not—"

"Don't lie to me, Chloe." His grey eyes found mine. "What happened?"

"Nothing." The lie tasted bitter. "He probably just feels guilty about the treatment failing."

"Bullshit." Marcus stopped walking, forcing me to face him. "Something happened between you two. What was it?"

"Marcus, please."

"Tell me."

But I couldn't. Couldn't admit what I'd done. So I just shook my head and changed the subject, ignoring the frustration written across his face.

Fiona had been avoiding me just as completely. I'd tried to find her several times, but she was never in the usual places. Her room door stayed locked. She took her meals in her chambers.

By the evening of the second day, I couldn't take it anymore. Everyone else was in Dad's study discussing security and investigation updates. The castle felt empty without the usual bustle of activity.

I made my way to Fiona's room and knocked. No answer.

I knocked again. Still nothing.

Finally, I just opened the door.

Fiona sat on her bed with a book in her lap, looking up when I entered. The rage in her blue eyes made me want to close the door and run.

"What do you want?" Her voice was cold. Distant.

"I want to apologize." I stepped inside, closing the door behind me. "What happened with Lucian, it wasn't meant to—"

"Wasn't meant to happen?" Fiona's laugh was bitter. "Is that supposed to make it better?"

"No. I just—"

"You're playing with them, you know that right?" She stood up, throwing her book aside. "Playing with two fucking brothers like it's some game. The precious Chloe with two hot guys pining over her. You must feel so important."

The words hit like physical blows. "That's not fair."

"Fair?" Her voice rose. "You want to talk about fair? I told you how I felt about Lucian. Told you I cared about him. And what did you do? You kissed him! The first chance you got!"

"I didn't mean—"

"You never mean to, do you?" Fiona's face was flushed with anger and hurt. "Poor Chloe. Everything just happens to her. She can't help that Marcus declared his love. Can't help that Lucian can't stop staring at her. Can't help that she kisses one brother while the other would die for her."

Each word cut deeper. "Fiona, please—"

"You know what the worst part is?" Tears were streaming down her face now. "I've spent my whole life in your shadow. Being compared to you. 'Why can't you be more like Chloe? Chloe's such a natural leader. Chloe's so brave.' And I accepted it because you're my sister and I love you."

Her voice broke. "But this? Watching you have everything I want without even trying? Without even caring? That's too much, Chloe. That's just too fucking much."

I stood there taking it, letting her rage wash over me. Because she was right. About all of it. I'd been so caught up in my own problems that I hadn't stopped to think about what my actions would do to her.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

"Get out."

"Fiona—"

"I said GET OUT!"

I stumbled backward, my heart breaking. When I reached the door, I looked back one more time. Fiona had turned away, her shoulders shaking with sobs.

I left, pulling the door closed behind me as quietly as I could.

The tears came the moment I was alone in the corridor. I pressed my back against the wall, struggling not to break down completely.

Movement caught my eye. A figure disappearing around the corner, like they'd been watching and didn't want to be seen. I blinked hard, trying to clear my tear-filled vision, but I couldn't tell if it was male or female. Couldn't tell if I'd seen anything at all.

I walked away slowly, my mind spinning with everything that had just happened.

What the fuck had really happened with Lucian? How could I have kissed him? It made no sense. One moment I was listening to him explain his theory, the next I was noticing how handsome he was, and then... then we were kissing.

It felt wrong. Not just because of Fiona. Something about the whole situation felt off in a way I couldn't name.

Today was the second day since the failed treatment. If I remembered right, Lucian had said his new brew would be ready tomorrow.

Which meant I had until tomorrow to figure out what the hell I was going to do. About Fiona. About Lucian. About the kiss that shouldn't have happened.

Right there in the empty corridor, I made up my mind.

I was going to talk to Lucian. Get answers about what happened. Clear the air before attempting another treatment.

Because I couldn't go through that again. Not with all this unresolved tension hanging over us.

Tomorrow, I decided. Tomorrow I'd face him and figure out what the fuck had really happened between us.