Chapter 63 MIND WAR (2)
WILLA'S POV
He groaned as his body twitched a little.
We continued the wet and slow dance of our lips and tongue, the smacking and sucking sound the only thing that broke the silence in the room.
My hand rested on the side of his neck, the exact spot where I intend to lay my bite and claim him. Meanwhile, I let my other hand continue the gentle scratching on his scalp.
“Fucking hell,” he breathily whispered when I pulled away.
His eyes were still closed, and his lips were pink and spit-slicked. He was such a sight to behold that it caused a wave of wetness to dampen my underwear.
“Don’t stop,” he murmured as he brushed his nose against my cheek. “Don’t stop, Willa.”
“I don’t intend to,” I said just as softly, mildly afraid that if I dared to speak a tad bit louder, the fragile truce between us would shatter beneath our feet.
“Then kiss me again.”
And so I did.
But this time, I allowed myself to pour my feelings into it.
Passion. Lust. Yearning. Need. Anger. Want. Heartache. Fear.
I kissed him as if I was breathing him in. I held him close, almost clinging with desperation, as if I was afraid he would slip from my grasp any second.
Soon enough, my hands wandered down between our pressed bodies until I found the buttons of his waistcoat, which was sinfully hugging his torso. Then, not wanting to waste a single second, I deftly unclasped all the buttons of the apparel.
I did the same to his white button up, leaving me free to touch and roam my hands across his toned and taut chest and abdomen.
Even then, throughout all my efforts, Gallahan’s hands remained firm on the bed. They clutched the sheets tightly, his arms and knuckles straining with the effort to keep himself still.
He was clearly unwilling to touch me.
The realization triggered a painful pang to strike me mid-kiss, and I had to shut my eyes tightly to prevent tears from welling up.
I brought this all to myself.
My fated mate now belonged to someone else.
And I lost him because of no one but myself.
That kiss in the maze and how he pulled me close was probably nothing but a lapse in judgment on his part. Just his inner wolf winning over the faithfulness that his logical mind and his loyal heart were trying to cling to right now.
Bloody fucking hell.
What was I doing? Why was I even thinking about such matters? Why was I lamenting what I had willingly let go of on that bloody night six years ago?
With a bit of effort, I recalibrated my mind, trying to focus on the present moment.
On Gallahan’s hardness beneath me.
On his intoxicating scent that enveloped all of my senses.
On the way his muscles rippled and eased under my touch.
On the way his breath hitched every time my fingers grazed his nipples and navel.
And on the way he was moving his mouth against mine.
Constrained. Controlled. Cold.
So different from the way he kissed me in the maze.
Immediately, I pulled away and left my wonderful perch on his lap as if I had been stung.
“Fuck,” I gasped out.
‘Just focus on the pleasure,’ I thought to myself almost beratingly.
So I brought myself to my knees, settling on the floor and between his spread legs. Then my fingers swiftly unfastened the clasp of his trousers and unzipped the zipper.
“What…” Gallahan mumbled quite dazedly, as if his brain was still catching up to what I was trying to do.
I didn’t bother giving him an answer. I leaned forward, bringing my face close to his still clothed erection, nuzzling my nose and cheek against the hardness.
Then with mildly trembling fingers, I freed his cock, taking a moment to marvel at its feel against my palm, as well as its girth and weight.
I barely even noticed the soft hiss Gallahan made when I wrapped my hand around the shaft.
Slowly, my other hand crept under my dress, finding my soaking wet folds.
A sharp shiver of desire ran along my arms and back, and I had to bite my lower lip to keep myself from wantonly moaning like a cat in heat.
“Willa,” Gallahan breathed out.
I took that as my cue to go on. I toyed with my clit as I leaned forward and gave Gallahan’s tip an experimental lick.
He gasped loudly, then an expletive rolled out from his tongue right after.
This emboldened me to finally open my mouth, ready to take him in.
But then…
“Don’t,” he suddenly said, his voice coming out ragged and raspy.
I immediately stilled, the fingers I had on my clit ceasing their movement.
My heart hammered loudly in my ears, and I felt my entire world halt and fade around me.
“Not this,” he said urgently. “Anything but this.”
Shame and embarrassment immediately flooded my entire being, and I couldn’t bring myself to look up at him because tears of humiliation had already pooled in my eyes.
What a joke I had become.