But what was I supposed to say?! Yes? Is that what she expected me to say? To fucking admit everything that went through me in that moment? + I shut my eyes for a second, doing my best to find some resistance.. Fighting every.. Every damn urge inside me and turning around from her. I couldn't let her know.. I couldn't let her know that I was so damn weak on that.. Fearlessness. Valiance.. Her daring self. + "Just drop it." I told her, meaning every single damn word. + But could I be a bigger fool, actually believing that she would drop it? That Lana could let something go. Christ, no. Of course not. And so there it was, that daring, challenging, perfect voice. + "No, tell me. Am I supposed to be scared to talk back to you?" I turned back around, just to see her less than a feet away from me. + "No!" And not even my rage, my shouting could scare her.. Make her drop it and quit daring me.. + "Then what?!" It was enough.. Enough for me to let go.. To drop every bit of control I had left inside me.. Every little resistance. Like cloud filled with every drop I held for myself, breaking open and raining down. + With a grip around her wrist that made her almost crash against me, I pulled her closer, just to see those wide eyes.. Those daring green eyes stare back at mine.. Challenging me.. Making me say all the damn things I had on my mind.. Still showing not even a spark of fear.. Yet anger.. + Could she not see? Could she not see that I had no resistance when it came to her? If I thought I was crazy, she was even crazier, daring me to say all those things.. All the things I felt, and I couldn't even regret saying them. + "I'm drawn to you, Lana. Don't you fucking get it?! I see you yell and scream at me and all I can think is all the damned things I want to do to you,-" I held her close and shouted, yet she didn't even flinch, like a dare devil staring back at my eyes and making me say more.. And more and more. "It just all flashes in my head in moments like this, and I do not have any fucking resistance when it comes to you." 1 I searched her face so desperately, I knew she could say it.. And she kept quiet, seeming still angry, yet listened, not moving an inch away. How could she be.. How could she be so damn bold and brave.. Beautiful and damn fearless. Fucking unreal. + Seeing her.. Seeing her so close seemed to distract me.. My voice faded away.. I almost started whispering, losing my voice by just looking her in the eyes. + "I see the real you in moments like this. You're vulnerable, and pure, and I see it all, Lana, you're letting me see it all, and that's not fucking good." +