Chapter 169 Change in routine

Chapter 169 Change in routine
Valeria's POV 
Mrs. Fischer smiled faintly. "Sometimes, Valeria, we make the mistake of thinking we have to compartmentalize every part of our lives. As though you can put your emotions in one box, your academics in another, your friendships in another, and simply refuse to let them overlap."

I listened quietly. 

"But you're a person," she continued. "Not a machine. Maybe you've been doing that all your life, but it gets to a point where you just have to let those feelings show. When something hurts you emotionally, it's going to affect other parts of your life. That doesn't mean you're weak. It means you're human."

I swallowed. "I know."

She studied me for a moment. "Is this about a relationship?"

My eyes lifted to hers.

"You don't have to tell me anything you aren't comfortable sharing," she added. "But from the look of things, I can only assume it's a relationship issue."

I let out a quiet breath. "Yeah."

"Did something happen?"

I stared down at my hands again. For a few seconds, I didn't say anything as I tried to put myself together. Then I finally nodded. 

"Zayne and I broke up." The words came out surprisingly calm.

Mrs. Fischer's expression softened. "Oh, I'm so sorry."

I nodded once.

"It happened recently?"

"Yesterday."

"And how are you feeling about it?"

"Honestly?" A nervous laugh escaped me. "Terrible."

I smiled, pressing my thumb to the corner of my eye as I tried to stop the tear that wanted to spill.

"I can't cry," I said, chuckling awkwardly.

"You don't have to prove anything to me."

"I'm not trying to." I looked toward the window. "I just... I don't want to keep falling apart over this. I don't want to become someone who can't function because a relationship ended." 

"Ending a relationship doesn't mean you have to fall apart," she said. "But it also doesn't mean you have to pretend it didn't hurt."

I nodded slowly. "It hurt, and I know it's still gonna hurt for a very long time." 

"Did you want the relationship to end?"

I shook my head immediately. "No."

There was no trembling in my voice. No tears. Just the pure truth.

"I loved him," I admitted quietly. "I still do. I don't know how long it'll take me to stop feeling like this. I don't know if I can ever heal from this, but I know I can't let it destroy everything else in my life."

I bit down on my lip. "I've been so used to having him around," I admitted. "And now everything feels different."

"That's normal," Mrs. Fischer said. "You're adjusting to a change in your routine as much as you're adjusting to the emotional loss."

I took another slow breath. "So what do I do?"

"You take it one day at a time. Focus on what you can control. Attend your classes. Study. Spend time with people who make you feel supported. Eat properly. Sleep. And when you have a difficult day, don't punish yourself for having one."

I nodded. 

"And don't isolate yourself," she added.

"I'll try not to."

"Please do not."

There was a brief silence before she asked, "Would you like me to speak with Zayne?"

My eyes immediately lifted to hers. "No."

She raised a brow slightly.

"He made his decision," I said calmly. "A firm one. I don't think there's anything you or anyone else can say that would change his mind."

"And you're certain you don't want someone to intervene?" 

I nodded. "I don't want anyone to convince him to stay with me. If he doesn't want this anymore, then..." I paused, forcing myself to breathe. "Then I have to respect that."

Mrs. Fischer studied me for a moment before nodding. "That's very mature."

I looked down at my hands. "I'm trying."

"I can see that." She leaned forward slightly. "But remember, being mature doesn't mean you have to be emotionless. If you need to cry, cry. If you need to talk, talk. If you need another session, come back. I'll always be here."

I gave her a small smile. "I think I might."

"You're always welcome."

I nodded and slowly stood from the chair.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome, Valeria."

I smiled and stood up from the chair. 

Zayne was still there—in my thoughts, in my memories, in every part of me that hadn't yet learned how to live without him. 

But I had to start from somewhere. I had to learn how to manage life without him.


After school, Tessa drove me to Zayne's house. I stared out the window the entire ride, my hands clasped tightly in my lap.

I needed to get my things. I couldn't keep staying there. And I also believed Zayne was avoiding home because of me. Maybe coming back to the house and seeing me every day was making things harder for him, so he just had to break up with me so I could leave. 

The moment we pulled into the driveway, I took a deep breath.

"You want me to come with you?" Tessa asked.

I shook my head. "I'll be fine."

She studied me for a moment, clearly unconvinced, but eventually nodded. "Alright. I'll be here waiting."

I stepped out of the car. For a few seconds, I just stood there, staring at the house.

This had been my second home for so long. Now it felt strangely unfamiliar.

I walked inside. The house was quiet—not the type of quietness that existed in the Whitmore mansion, but the type that was hospitable to visitors and everyone who lived in it.

I stepped farther inside and noticed Zayne's mom sitting in the living room. 

She looked up and smiled when she saw me. "Valeria."

"Hii," I said, forcing a smile. 

"You didn't come home last night."

"Yeah. I... stayed at my friend's place. I'm sorry I couldn't call."

I didn't know what else to say. How would I tell her that her son had just broken my heart?

"It's fine," she said.

"Okay. I'll go inside now."

"Of course."

I nodded and quickly walked headed to Zayne's bedroom. The moment I pushed open his door, memories came rushing back.

So many memories.

I swallowed hard.

Don't think about it. I said to myself.

I walked over to the wardrobe and began pulling out my clothes. One by one, I stuffed them into my bag.

I tried to focus on what I was doing, ignoring the memories, but it almost felt impossible.

I reached for the last few clothes hanging inside when something caught my attention. 

There was a canvas sitting against the wall near his wardrobe. I hadn't really noticed it before. 

Hesitantly, I turned the canvas around. 

It held a completed painting. I stared at it, completely speechless.

It was a painting of me. I was on the canvas in the emerald green dress I wore on my birthday night.

Zayne had painted me just like he said he would.

A gasp escaped me. My fingers trembled as I reached toward the painting, stopping just before touching it.

He had captured my face so perfectly. The expression in my eyes. The unwavering smile on my face. Everything about the dress—even the tiny details.

He'd painted everything so perfectly.

A tear slipped down my cheek, and I quickly wiped it away. My lips trembled as I continue staring at the painting.

Why was he doing this to me? Why did he have to leave me with all these pieces of him?

I covered my mouth, trying to hold back the sob threatening to escape. But my chest tightened.

I couldn't stay here. 

No. I couldn't stay here looking at this painting and getting my heart broken all over again.

I quickly grabbed my bag and wiped my face with the back of my hand. Then I rushed out of the room, pulling the door shut behind me.

By the time I reached the living room, Zayne's mother was no longer there. Quinn was already home.

She looked up from her phone. "Val?"

I stopped.

She smiled faintly. "I was actually worried about you. You didn't come home last night, and—"

Her smile disappeared as her eyes slowly moved over my face. "Are you crying?"

I immediately looked away. "I'm fine."

"You're obviously not."

She stood up and walked toward me. Then her gaze dropped to the bag in my hand. "Why do you have a bag?"

I tightened my grip around the strap. "I came to get my things." 

Her brows furrowed. "Why?"

I didn't answer.

"Val, what's going on?"

I swallowed hard. "Where's Zayne?"

Damn it. Why was I asking?

She stared at me for a moment. "I don't know. He still hasn't come home. I thought you two were out together last night."

I lowered my gaze. 

"Val?"

I looked up at her.

"What happened?"

My lips parted, but for a moment, nothing came out. Then I bit my lip and finally whispered, "Zayne and I broke up."

"What?"

I looked down at my bag, blinking rapidly as the tears threatened to return. "Yeah. We're not together anymore." 

Her mouth fell slightly open. "But... why?"

I shook my head. "I don't know why. I just... I need to go. I think I'm the reason he's not coming home."

"But... where will you stay?" 

I gave a light shrug. "I'll be staying with Tessa for now. But I might go back to my dad's house."

"Are you sure about that?" 

"Yeah."

She shook her head. "I'm so sorry."

"It's fine."