Chapter 29 - Dorian

I could hardly believe my eyes. I hadn't imagined it would happen, I mean, I had a slight notion that it was possible, but I thought it would take longer to actually happen. Of course, I was pleased that EVE's screams weren't of terror and that she wasn't being attacked. The last thing I wanted was for Amelie to collect more trauma. However, it had been a long time since we had heard EVE act like that, if ever. They were screams and moans of pure pleasure, the kind that couldn't be faked. Carbon had really sent her over the edge. I didn't know what to think about it all, I mean, I'd never had sex with her, and neither had Amelie, so there was no reason to feel bad, after all, who's to say I couldn't do the same? Meanwhile, I was thinking about Axel, and who knows how many times he'd been with EVE. As far as I knew, he couldn't do all that to her. He was probably feeling a lot worse than I was.

"I can't take it. I don't have to," I said, while still looking at the whole scene. I looked at Axel, who was just as stunned as I was. In fact, even the two gossip girls were open-mouthed, trying to understand the entire situation. Although we worked in a place like that, and dealing with sounds, nudity, etc. was normal for us, we still hadn't expected to have to see that kind of thing. I couldn't stay there. The sight made me ill.

Immediately, I told Axel to deal with it, because I needed to get out of there. Despite what it looked like, I had a certain sensitivity to things and was, in a way, an emotional person. For that reason, it was even worse that I was in withdrawal from substances and completely lost in drugs too. I could trigger anxiety so easily that the only way to calm down was to smoke something. I had hit rock bottom, being like that. Likewise, I didn't expect to have to deal with it for so long.

OWeLL's club was in a fairly isolated area. We had no neighbors, just our own plot of land. It was big. We had enough space to expand the place, or even open a new business. It was the perfect place to smoke. I quickly grabbed my backpack and told the secretary that I'd be back soon. I didn't even know who was going to take care of things, but I knew that at that moment, I was in no condition. My abstinence combined with my anxiety was even causing me shortness of breath. And it was ironic that the only thing that helped me was the stink of cigarette smoke or the breeze of a weed. Really rock bottom.

I went to the side of the OWE grounds and opened my backpack in a hurry while trying to find the first thing that could help me. I couldn't use weed, as I didn't have enough time to prepare everything, so the only solution would be to grab the first dubious cigarette I found in there. It didn't take long, and I found it, and immediately took it into my mouth, eager for the first puff. I would take a drag so strong that even I, a new addict, would cough dry. And then I realized what a fuck-up I'd made. I didn't have a lighter. I simply hadn't put it back in my backpack the last time I'd used it. Not only that, but I had no fire, and without a fire, I couldn't light a cigarette. My anxiety got worse and worse, and the shortness of breath began to intensify. I wasn't ready. I could run into the club and grab a lighter, but no one knew I smoked. Things needed to stay that way, because no one should know that I was lost in it. Axel finding out was bad enough for me, if anyone else knew, I was screwed. Entering OWE was out of the question. So I bent down, holding my knees, trying to breathe and find a way to stay calm, while still holding the cigarette in my mouth.

"Are you all right?" I heard someone ask. I was so immersed in the shit that the voice alone wasn't enough for me to recognize. Then I looked up and made eye contact. It was Cindy. Cindy was there. "My God, Dorian, you look terrible," she said, coming closer, wanting to help me. It was so dark that I wasn't sure if she'd seen the cigarette or not. In any case, there wouldn't be time to hide it, so I just stepped back a little, while still trying to breathe. "Is that a cigarette? Are you trying to smoke?" she asked, realizing. It was over, I'd lost everything. Cindy would tell EVE, and consequently, Amelie would find out about my addiction. I was screwed. "Wait a minute," she said, reaching into her pocket. "Here," she said, smiling, as she found a lighter. Immediately, my instincts took it from her hand. I lit the cigarette quickly. I needed that smoke, I needed that feeling of life slipping away. I sighed with relief when the cigarette lit up. To my surprise, the huge drag I had taken hadn't made me cough. Perhaps I was even more worried than I thought.

To my surprise, Cindy didn't say anything. All she did was reach into her pocket again and pull out a ready-made weed cigarette for herself. I didn't know she smoked. In fact, I didn't know much about her, apart from her job and her interest in me. Cindy was very pretty, so pretty that if she wanted to, she could work at OWE. Clients would never be a problem for her. I wanted to ask her if she'd been smoking for a long time, but I was sure the question would turn to me. I didn't want to talk about it.

"I didn't know you smoked, Dorian," he said as he took a drag. It was good weed, I could tell. I liked it, I liked it a lot. Whenever I had a good load, I'd steal some for my own consumption. Of course, if you're involved in something wrong, you start doing more wrong.

"I'm surprised to see you smoke too," I said, staring at her. By then, I had recovered from my anxiety and was no longer short of breath. To my relief, there were only the two of us outside. "You seem to like quality stuff," I said, mentioning weed.

"Yeah, I remember you handing the package to the guy I bought it from," she said, naturally. At that moment, my eyes went wide. "Yes, Dorian, that guy is my father. And yes, I know you've been into all this stuff lately, but I thought you were just delivering. I'm really surprised to see you using," she said, taking another drag. "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone. If no one knows, it's because you don't want them to," she said. Cindy seemed different. She was still sweet, and kind. A perfect woman. But seeing her like that gave her a different kind of maturity. "Do you use it?" she asked, offering me the cigarette. I wanted to refuse, but before I knew it, my hands were already reaching for her cigarette. So I took a deep drag, pulling in everything I could. I really needed to relax.

Then, as soon as I'd finished puffing, Cindy came up to me and kissed me. Her tongue invaded my mouth, and my tongue didn't stop her. On the contrary, it accepted her. I wasn't thinking very well when I started to stroke her back and kiss her back. Her hair was slightly shorter than Amelie's. Cindy was very slim and fit in well with my body. In other words, mixing a stoned guy with a beautiful woman also stoned, couldn't end any other way. In the end, in a way, she had saved me. My mind kept going back to EVE in bed with Carbon. What the hell, I didn't care. I undressed Cindy right there in the bushes. I pulled down my pants and lifted her skirt, pushing her panties aside. I took her body to the wall and shoved my cock inside. "That's what you want, isn't it?" I said, pressing her arms to the wall. "Then take it," I said, shoving my cock all the way inside her. I hadn't had sex for a while. All those mixed emotions were messing with my sanity. I fucked Cindy until I came. Her expression of pleasure wouldn't leave my mind so easily. It was supposed to be a quick fuck, so it didn't take me long to come. "Get dressed and come in," I said, as I put on my own clothes. On the spot, without remorse, I thanked her for the cigarette and then walked into OWE, going to the bar to get back to my job as a bartender. The loud sounds of pleasure could still be heard. EVE and Carbon must have been doing it again. But I didn't care. I'd already had what I needed.