Chapter 8

“DO YOU still think about him?”

“Who?” I asked while shopping for summer dresses. I only had a few clothes that’s why I asked Austin to come with me to the mall. When I turned to look at him, there was no hint of boredom or discomfort on his face even if I knew he didn’t like noisy and crowded places. Yet, I dragged him to watch a movie a while ago. I also had him accompany me when I went to the supermarket a couple of times or whenever I wanted to go window shopping or to just walk around the park.

And Austin gladly makes time for me. Some days, he was like a delightful sheep. Some days, he was like a dangerous wolf... especially every night when we’d kiss and do more.

I know that this was not what I was supposed to do. I should make him desire me more by avoiding the things he finds uncomfortable. But I couldn’t stop myself. I wanted him to stop being nice for once because whether I like it or not, my conscience was beginning to get the best of me whenever I’m with him especially since he would go out of his way just to bring breakfast to me every morning so we could eat together. He would also take me out to have dinner every night.

Austin was too kind for me. I didn’t know that it was possible for someone as monstrous as Benedict to have a son as endearing as Austin. I didn’t even know I still had some conscience left in me until I got to spend time with his son.

But I kept failing to pester him. In fact, I’d always catch him smiling fondly at me. The warmth in his eyes was a lot to take most of the times. Whenever we are together, I keep dragging him out of his comfort zone but he seemed to be enjoying every bit of it.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have brought him up.” I heard him say.

My brows furrowed. “What do you mean? Did you say something? I didn’t hear you.”

“I was… talking about your ex. Do you still think of him?”

I was stunned and just looked at him. I should be over the moon. It seems that my parents were guiding me from up above because the plan was going well. I was able to sneak inside Austin’s quiet world. But I could not celebrate completely.

My heart had been covered in darkness after what Benedict did to my family. And I worry that in the process, I might put a stain in Austin’s heart the way his father stained mine.

“Maggy?”

When I didn’t respond, Austin looked away. Before that, I saw how sadness crossed his eyes. And I wasn’t supposed to care. But I do. He was about to turn his back from me when I called him.

“I understand, Maggy, don’t worry. I was just a little upset but this will pass.” He smiled but it did not reach his eyes. “I’ll just wait for you outside the store.”

“Sometimes, I think of Noah when I’m alone,” I said instead. And it was true. Sometimes, I still remember him. We’ve been together for a year and a half, after all. We wouldn’t have broken up if not for me, if not for my revenge plan which he strongly objected. And of course, it was understandable. He didn’t like that I would be putting myself at risk. Noah was a good man and a wonderful boyfriend, too. He was a pediatrician who once stayed over at YCM Hotel along with his co-doctors during their seminar. That was where we met and fell in love.

Because I was persistent to avenge my parents and go back to the Philippines, our relationship fell apart. I asked him to wait for a year when he wanted us to get married just so I could stay in Nevada with him. But he was opposed to that.

In the end, we could not even be friends again. I knew it was my fault but I couldn’t give up my revenge plan. I couldn’t give up something that had kept me alive for several years.

I continued looking at Austin. He was the last person I’d talk to over the phone before I sleep at night. His call was also the one that wakes me in the morning. He would call just to wish me sweet dreams, and every morning, he would call again to greet me and to remind me that life was beautiful. That’s why it was pretty hard for me to think about anyone else.

Austin’s face dominated my mind, from his jet-black hair to his soulful blue eyes, down to his lips, which were the color of cherries, my favorite fruit. And then I would often find myself thinking about the kisses that we’ve shared.

“Do you catch yourself thinking about him when you are with me?” Uncertainty filled Austin’s eyes.

“It’s hard to think about anything else when I’m with you, Austin,” I whispered sincerely. His eyes glowed. “How about you? I thought you dislike noisy and crowded places? Yet, you keep coming with me in places like this.”

“It’s hard to keep disliking the places where you’re at. I don’t care wherever you take me as long as I’m with you. I just like to be anywhere you wanted to be, Maggy. It makes me alive. It makes me happy.”

I did not answer and just smiled.