***Chapter Forty***
Palms sweaty, heart racing, I stood outside Drew’s door debating on whether to knock on the door. It was such a hard debate despite knowing what I do. My fear was getting into a heated argument with him before solving any of our problems. It definitely would happen if we stayed to talk in this room. So, instead of doing that, I took a different approach.
I took a deep breath before knocking on the door. The anticipation for him to answer killed me. But when he did, his body looked like it recoiled just at my presence. It’s obvious he was mad at me without having much reason to be. I took it with a grain of salt because the person who should be upset was me. He’s the one who shoved himself onto my date without my permission. Yet here Drew was, being angry. So angry that he tried to close the door in my face before I stopped it with my foot.
“Before you get your panties in a twist, come skate with me.” I suggest with a soft expression.
I was going to do everything I could to get him to come with me. He wanted to go to the park before it got cold and this was a perfect time. Even if he didn’t want to see me right now. My friends needed my help with something that might change all of their lives. For that, I’m willing to put behind all our animosity at the moment so they could achieve something beautiful. Even if it meant being a suck up.
Drew stared at me intently before groaning, annoyed by me. He grabbed his board, and we rode along together to the skate park. The ride was awkward and silent as the sounds of our wheels against the concrete consumed us. Things between us couldn’t be anymore weird. I’m not sure what he had to be angry about, anyway. If he didn’t want to see me with Keegan, he should have never come. To be bitching and moaning while Juliana was there also didn’t make for a good look. I bet she had a lot to say to him on their Ferris Wheel ride.
We got there with minimal people in attendance as well. Still not saying a word to each other, we skated around some before I stopped to look at him. As much as I wanted to scream at him, I wanted to curse him out. My heart wouldn’t let me. The hold Drew had on me was so strong, yet so fragile. One little thing could change everything and it scared me. I’m not ready to lose Drew as a friend or secret partner. Not after I just got him for one. And two, something connected us in a way that no one else would understand. Was it worth being mad at each other over something so trivial?
Noticing my gaze, Drew stops in his tracks to stare back at me. Although his gaze wasn’t as friendly as mine, I can tell he had a lot on his mind and his plate. It made me feel bad for even wanting to scold him for what he did. I couldn’t just let him walk away scot free, though. He needed to know that I’m my own person in this agreement. If he’s allowed to do what he wanted, I should get that same luxury.
Crossing his arms, Drew’s frown never left his face. “You may as well say you have to say while you can.” He was expecting the worse.
Sighing, I rolled my eyes in annoyance. “Just tell me why,” I say, quietly.
“Why what?” His voice was so hostile. He’s never used this tone with me before.
Now I frowned. “Why did you invite yourself on my date with Keegan?” I’m straightforward.
He shrugs with annoyance as well. “I…I don’t know, Annabelle.” I can tell he didn’t want to answer me.
“Drew, you know, so tell me.” I urged.
Beating around the bush was something Drew was good at. All I wanted was an answer why he handled things the way he did. It only caused more problems between us instead of getting down to the nitty gritty. Without him being honest, how were we going to sort through our issues? Address the elephant in the room, if you will. As much as I don’t want to, I’m willing to be honest about my feelings if he were. It didn’t look like that’ll happen much to my dismay.
He licks his lips furiously. “What do you want me to say, Annabelle?” He wondered. “It’s not like anything is going to change.”
“How do you know nothing will change? You know nothing until you try.” I try to get him to cross that line, push the boundaries, but nothing worked.
That only frustrated him more. “I’ve been trying, dammit! You obviously are set on talking to Keegan.” Not this again.
I sigh, feeling the frustration building up inside me. “What does who I talk to have to do with anything?” I ask him. “Seriously, this small agreement we had didn’t entail me not exploring my options, Drew.”
“Maybe I thought you would just get the message,” He kicks his board. “Clearly, not.”
Drew made little sense and the reason I came to talk to him looked as if I wouldn’t even get to that point. There was so much that we both needed to get off our chest. So much explored feelings and temptations that were building up and ate us both alive. Especially Drew, as he was coming to grips with his feelings as well. Whatever those may be, him not communicating was going to be a detriment to everything we’ve worked so hard toward. Our relationship was something I couldn’t imagine having 2 years ago. Why did it have to be so complicated?
Still, I was over him bringing up Keegan and not saying much about it. He wouldn’t tell me what was so bad about him. There were no details he was providing me with to make a conclusive decision about whether or not to believe him. Everything I’ve seen from Keegan has been nothing but honesty and trust that we’ve created by communicating with one another. It’s like Drew didn’t realize the reason Keegan and I worked so well. The sole reason Drew and I weren’t clicking. There wasn’t much communication.
I was over it and over this conversation, but I had to keep trying. “What is your problem with Keegan? Are you just that jealous?” I query.
He laughed sarcastically at my realization. “Ding, ding, ding! I don’t know how much more clear I have to be about that!” His voice raised.
“What is there for you to be jealous of? You have a girlfriend!” I raised my voice back.
His face looked at me, unamused. “Annabelle, if you’re going to sit there and pretend like you never get jealous, then you’re delusional.”
My cheeks flushed. I knew what he was saying was right, and I couldn’t be too angry at him. My jealousy at seeing him with Juliana always showed itself. I’m fully aware of how sad I get anytime I see them do anything remotely romantic together. The difference is, I don’t go inserting myself in their private time. I don’t invite myself and Keegan on their dates or even if he’s in his dorm. I kept my emotions to myself and Dillon if she feels like listening. It’s not that he was jealous, it’s the way he handled it that pissed me off.
Hearing my silence, Drew spoke up, a lot more calm than he had been. The argument was getting tired and there wasn’t much else I could say after his point. We were both a complete mess and nothing could be done until it was dealt with properly.
“Annabelle, what do you want me to do?” He asks me with a little of every emotion in his eyes.
Shrugging, I look at him. “Support me. Support me as your friend.” I say because it’s all that I wanted.
That seemed to be too much of a task for him, though. “Supporting you with Keegan is not something I could do,” he admits. “It won’t work.”
Rolling my eyes, I could feel myself welling tears from the frustration that is Andrew Tate. “Right, because if it’s not Drew’s way, it’s the highway.”
“I didn’t-”
“You didn’t have to!” I yell at him again. “Your actions speak for themselves.”
The moment was tense; it was awkward and I couldn’t quite grasp what to do next. All I wanted was to get away from him and act like whatever we had going on didn’t exist. I told them this was a bad idea and we should have made Juliana do it. The most I could do now was to inform him of what’s happening before walking away. Drew would never get where I’m coming from and that’s fine. But he better not expect me to continue on with our agreement if he couldn’t even give me a reason for his actions. Everything I’ve sought after is now down the drain. Was any of it worth it to begin with?
I pick up my board before turning back toward him. “Listen, Dre and Cam signed you guys up for the talent show,” I explain. “It’s to sing your song and Keegan is also going to help by playing the guitar.”
“Annabelle…”
“Be there, don’t be there. I don’t actually care.” Now I’m lying. “Just don’t let your pettiness impede doing something amazing.”
I finish my thought before zooming away back to campus. I could hear Drew calling my name after I cut him off, but didn’t dare to look back. The conversation couldn’t have gone any worse. Whether or not he showed up would be entirely on him. Regardless, I would be there to support my friends. Even if Drew isn’t included in that anymore.