Chapter 15:

**Amanda Hank:**

Finally, after so long, I will see Emily again.

After she decided to change universities, to one that she really liked, what she could study; Shopping and friend outings were affected by our unequal schedules.

Therefore, I haven't heard much from my best friend. Well, no more than we talk over text messages.

But everyone knows that it is not the same.

I really miss having her in my apartment, trying her exquisite midnight meal and in general, I miss her a lot.

Today we will meet at our favorite restaurant and catch up.

I feel relaxed when I arrive at the place and I see her smile when she sees me.

A pretty blonde hugs me and she smiles at me like when we were little girls.

"Amanda, god, I've missed you so much." She gives me a kiss on the cheek and we sit down. "You don't know how much I miss you in the new apartment, it feels so empty without you." She pouts and I laugh.

"It's a shame... because I don't." I dare to joke.

She opens her mouth indignantly and then laughs.

We start talking while we have a leisurely breakfast.

She tells me how difficult it has been to adapt to her new career, to her classmates and especially to her teachers. She also tells me that she's been flirting with one of his classmates, and I don't think it's strange that he's a nerdy comic book fan.

Yes, my friend loves nerds.

Since according to her they are the best in bed when it comes to fucking and to spend an unforgettable night. It's as if they evolved into their best version, as if they were a pokemon.

I prefer to believe her and remain in doubt.

"Well, I've talked too much already. What about you? Last I heard, you got the job. How's that going?"

"Not much, really... There are good and bad things, the normal thing. I'm just a secretary... and yes, that..."

And I have given myself away at the trial of my best friend.

"You're babbling a lot." She states. "There's something you're not telling me."

"I don't know what you're talking about. I have nothing to tell you."

She narrows her eyes and takes care of looking for some clue on my face.

"I know you well enough to know that you're hiding something from me."

"I know, but really. I have nothing to hide." I lie blatantly.

Because I really need to talk about John, about the deal, and that I lost my virginity to my father's best friend. I'm really doubting whether I did the right thing or my fear of being discovered by my father in the midst of passionate action.

I need to vent to her, she is my best friend after all.

Since I walked through that door I want to reveal all the details, if I'm honest.

But something stops me.

Will she judge me for my decisions these past few weeks? Will she be pleased to hear that from her shy best friend? Will she tell me that I'm wrong and stop talking to me about how disgusting I am? Is it right to talk to her about this?

I think a big part of me doesn't know what to expect from her and her reaction. And I'm afraid that she will feel disgusted by my sincerity.

"And you lock yourself in your mind again, precious friend" She says when I stay silent for a few seconds. "Something's up, you know you can trust me, Amanda?"

I've always had short trips on my mind, and they usually tend to give away my mental messes.

John and Emily are always able to read them, and I really appreciate it, as they make me feel like a priority to them.

Wait, am I a priority for John?

"Amanda?" Emily asks sweetly. I see how he smiles and I almost blush.

I sigh and laugh. I don't want to feel choked with my best friend and I decide to talk, and then I'll see how she reacts.

"You see, there is something I have to say. Well, a lot of things, really." I admit after a few seconds, "Just promise you'll talk when I'm done talking, Emily."

“I promise, Amanda.”

I inhale and release the truth part by part, wishing that God will protect me.

"I do not know where to start…"

“Start with what you're dying to tell…” she encourages me by squeezing my hand.

“I have lost my virginity…”

Her face fills with amazement and she opens her mouth as if she expects me to say, -Just kidding.-, when it doesn't happen.

“Damn, I really didn't expect that.” she murmurs.

“And with my boss…” I finally say, and Emily's soul leaves her body. And I designed to smile and say “Surprise, beautiful…”

She lets go and my heart begins to tighten little by little, fearing that something bad will happen.

Emily runs her hands over her face and smiles at me.

“I appreciate knowing it in person, rather than by message…” she admits, calming my anguish. “Amanda, congratulations and welcome to the non-virgin world.” she jokes.

And I can breathe easily.

“But I know there's something else you want to tell me,” she says suddenly. "True?"

I nodded, surrendered to being honest.

"My boss…"

"Yeah?"

“He offered me a deal and I accepted it…” I avoided eye contact.

She raises an eyebrow.

“What kind of deal is Amanda? And why didn't you talk to me by then?” she asks, in a way that doesn't make me feel guilty. She is simply curious about what I am going to confess to her.

I close my eyes and respond.

“I didn't talk to you, because you were busy with your studies and your mother. Besides, I needed to think about it for myself.” I try to defend myself “Please don't be angry.”

“I'm not angry, I appreciate that you are honest and decided to talk to me about it.” He admits, “But I'll be mad if you don't tell me what the deal was.”

“It’s about…sex.”

“Oh, I didn't see that coming.” she confesses.

“Neither do I really.”

“And that's all you have to tell me?”

“I don't know… I want to know what you think.”

“And I want to know, it's just sex, how does it work?” ask.

I explain to him how the encounters between him and I work, avoiding the part about him being my master and I being his submissive. Since I prefer to have that for myself and I feel that I should have a little modesty and keep something for myself.

And then, I let out the last detail I was keeping from myself.

“And my boss is my father's friend.”

“Damn, it's amazing how surprised I am right now.” she admits.

"That's bad?"

Emily's face turns indignant and I want to disappear.

“Did you really think I was going to judge you for your decisions and magically I was going to disappear from your life?” I'm almost convinced that Emily reads minds. “How bad of a friend do you think I am, Amanda Hank?”

“I didn't know what to expect, you can't blame me, Emily,” I defend myself.

She sighs and takes my hands and forces me to look into her eyes.

“Please, Amanda, I hope this is the last time you doubt me and our friendship, especially that you never again think that my prejudices will be so abrupt in the face of you and your lifestyle.” she asks “I will never abandon you or judge you. And I can be sure that even if you kill 100 people and are the most wanted woman in the world, I will stop being your friend. Because to be honest, you are forced to put up with me until death, I swear, Amanda.”

I can swear I'm about to cry.

“It will be the last, I swear.”

She smiles.

“Perfect, because you have to tell me if your boss fucks well or has a flaccid penis that is useless.”

I laugh at his words.

“Well, orgasms are really good,” I admit, feeling my cheeks burn.

“Jesus Christ, did Amanda talk about orgasms and sex? I feel like it’s a fantasy.” she jokes “I never expected you to give yourself to a man, plus I thought you were allergic to men.”

“I know, I'm surprised too.” say.

“It's a good match, then.” she states, as she trusts my judgment regarding the people who come and go in my life.

“I believe it… So far, it's been worth it”

She nods.

“I feel happy for you, really. One of your first experiences, you don't know what awaits you.”

“And what does it expect according to you?”

“Think it will be a roller coaster and you are in the front row.” says “It's going to be a fantastic thrill ride, you better get your ass ready, Amanda.