Chapter 51 Chapter 50
Alpha king Kieran.
I stared at the trembling lady, her eyes red as she cried into the gag, already tied up and prepared for me. She turned to me with pleading eyes, her nose filled with snot and running down her face, her begging muffled.
"I... Can't." I forced out, my voice already hoarse and trembling as I glared at my father with the feeble strength I had left. He'd sent a harsh lashing through my back and legs before whispering viscously into my ears that if I didn't rape her, he would kill her in front of me and lock me up with the dead body for days without any food, water or light. Not wanting to experience that kind of terror, I had gone to the shaking woman, feeling more anger and shame that I have ever felt in my entire. She looked upon me with terror at her impending fate but there was little I could do to change it.
I'm sorry, I thought to myself as I drove into her till I reached the hilt, disgust crawling up my spine. But I also need to survive too.
I woke up with a start, my heart pounding in my chest. Sweat coated my brow, and I struggled to catch my breath. The nightmares had become a constant companion, a reminder of the monster that lurked within me. I knew then, in that moment of clarity, that I couldn't let myself fall for Evelyn. It had nothing to do with her, with who she was or what she represented. It was about me, about the darkness that resided within me. I was too damaged, too broken, to offer her anything but pain and destruction.
I pushed myself out of bed, the weight of my nightmares still clinging to me. I splashed cold water on my face, trying to wash away the remnants of the past. I looked at my reflection in the mirror, the tired eyes staring back at me. I had a kingdom to rule, a duty to fulfill. Love, happiness, those were luxuries I couldn't afford. I would protect my kingdom, even if it meant sacrificing my own desires. The monster within me would remain locked away, hidden from the world. And Evelyn, she would be kept at a distance, a reminder of the forbidden temptations that's threatening to consume us both.
A fierce voice in my mind raged against the vulnerability, against the idea of letting her in and I paid heed to it. I couldn't fall for Evelyn. The consequences would be dire. I couldn't allow it.
I am a monster and everything I touch, dies.
Evelyn.
The castle was abuzz with activity as the Moon Goddess festival approached. Six weeks had flown by since the fateful summon to the Alpha king's chambers and the atmosphere in the palace had shifted. The maids scurried about, their footsteps echoing through the grand halls, their hands full with preparations for the grand event. The castle was teeming with visitors, nobles from far and wide who had come to pay their respects to the Moon Goddess and meet with the Alpha King to discuss various things that were of importance.
As I made my way through the bustling corridors, I couldn't help but feel a sense of excitement in the air. The festival was a time of celebration and unity, a chance for the werewolf community to come together and honor the Moon Goddess who watched over us all. It was a time of joy and hope, a respite from the shadows that loomed over our lives.
Amaris, my dear friend and confidante, walked beside me. We had become inseparable in these past weeks, finding solace and companionship in each other's presence. As we worked, we engaged in a lively conversation about the festival before drifting int more personal matters.
"How's your relationship with the Duke Ethan going?" I asked as we moved bundles of clothing around, our footsteps echoing in the hallways.
She glanced at me, a bright smile on her face. "It's been quite splendid, actually. I guess Duke Ethan meant it when he said he wanted to have me back." She muttered, smiling sheepishly to herself. I smiled with her, turning my attention to the front of me before asking the next question.
"So, when are you giving him a reply?" I said.
She shrugged, gripping the bundle of clothes with her tighter. "During the moon goddess festival."
"I'm guessing it's going to be a positive reply?" I teased and she chuckled, brushing her hair behind her ears.
"We may never know, I just might change my mind at the last minute." She answered but I knew she was just playing around. The excitement she felt whenever Duke Ethan was around and he asked for her, couldn't be faked. It was obvious she loved him a lot, after all they were mates. It seemed that their relationship was slowly mending, with Ethan making efforts to win her back.
"What about you? How's the Alpha King treating you so far?" She asked and I faltered slightly, my heart skipping a beat at the question.
"His behavior hasn't changed much, but he has been summoning me less, lately." I admitted, keeping my voice low.
"He must be busy from all the preparations that comes with hosting the Moon goddess festival in this kingdom. It's going to be more stressful now with the queen no longer here" Amaris said, her voice thoughtful. "That's a good thing for you, right?" She asked and I nodded, smiling stiffly at her.
"I guess it is." I murmured, trailing off in the end. I tried to convince myself that his detachment was a good thing, a sign that he was focused on his role as the Alpha King, But deep down, doubts gnawed at me. Something had definitely shifted between us, especially since that night when he asked that question. He felt colder, more withdrawn and to my surprise, it unnerved me.
"Well, seems like things have been going on well for us lately. Let's finish with this quickly and go to the mines. I don't want to be late!" Amaris said aloud and I chuckled, hurrying up.
We finished with our duties in the castle and where on our way to the mines when a guard approached us, causing us to stop in our tracks.
"Lady Amaris, Duke Ethan is around and he requests your presence."