Chapter 10

Felicity paced around her small house in the morning. It hadn’t taken her long to pack the night before. Packing quickly and going on the road was something she could do without thinking. She paused to check the bags again. Her printer and the fax machine were in one small portable case and her laptop in another. She had no idea what clothes to take for something like this, so she took mostly comfortable ones. She checked her watch again. Was it the trip that was making her so jumpy or the fact that she hadn’t had any glimpses from Damian? Had they moved him further away? Lost in thought she jumped when someone knocked on the door. Moving quickly, she opened it to see Brent standing there grinning at her.

“Morning.”

She smiled. “Morning.”

“Ready to go?” She nodded. “We decided on two cars, we’ll meet Reid and Jac at the first motel.” He picked up the two hard cases.

Pulling on her jacket she nodded. “Sounds good.” She picked up her bag. “Oh.” She darted around the counter and picked up the large container on the counter. He gave her a curious look. “Traveling vegetarians back up.” She shook the container. “Trail mix.”

“Well, we wouldn’t want you to starve.”

Brent had watched her more than the road for the first hour they’d been driving. “We’re at least an hour more from where we’re starting, so let me know if you want me to stop anywhere.” She just nodded. “Everything okay?”

She looked over at him and then sighed. “Yes. I’m just a little worried.” He turned to look at her for a second. “I haven’t had any more glimpses and it’s bothering me after the blurry one I had.”

“Do you think he’s been moved further away?”

“I really don’t know.”

Brent’s phone ringing stopped him from saying anything further. “Hello.” He glanced at the clock. “About an hour.” Brent frowned. “None? What about the property search, did they get anywhere with it?” He sighed. “Okay, we’ll see you there.”

He clipped the phone back into the holder on the dash. “That was Alec. They didn’t get any complete prints from the shack and as near as anyone can figure out the shack belongs to the town now.”

Felicity frowned. “How does it belong to the town?”

“No taxes have been paid for years, so it reverts back to the town until taxes are caught up to date. The last owner died years ago.” He rolled his shoulders trying to relax. “Alec’s going to dig around a bit more. Someone has to know it doesn’t have an owner.”

“Oh, and chances of finding something there is?”

“Very slim.” He grimaced.

The day turned out to be a long, unproductive day. Felicity found out that detective work could be tedious and boring as they took turns going around the town showing Damian’s picture. The motel clerk had turned out to be less than cooperative and wasn’t in the mood to share information—although they had no description of the adult that had been with the boy, and no date of when they had stayed at the motel. Short of Jac breaking into every room and trying to see if that had been the room, there wasn’t much more to do at this point. None of them were willing to let Jacinda do that to herself either.

Felicity flipped through the sketches again, comparing them with the photographs she’d taken at the shack. Sighing she got up, what was she hoping to find a sign that pointed in the last known direction? The motel that she surveyed with bored eyes was only the first stop of four. How long did they plan to stay at this one? It wasn’t the worst place she’d stayed, but it felt – well used she supposed would be a polite description and it set off her need for clean and tidy. With her hands on her hips, she surveyed the papers and cups scattered around the room. They’d gotten two rooms, side by side, and she was sharing this one with Jac. She smirked remembering Reid hadn’t been altogether pleased with that arrangement, but it wouldn’t be polite to toss her in a room with a man she didn’t know, so they’d all agreed.

She’d given up an hour ago on listening in on the strategy session taking place next door and had come back to the room to jot down some new story ideas. Her animal friends were going to go on a trip she’d decided. Of course, she’d make their trip more interesting than sitting in a small motel room on a rainy evening. Rubbing her face, she moaned in frustration. If she could just see that Damian was all right, maybe this useless feeling would go away.

There was a light tap on the door before it opened and Brent walked in. He smiled at her. “How are your fuzzy friends making out?”

She almost asked him who, then realized he meant the storybook characters. “They’re not in a cooperative mood tonight.”

“Animals can be that way.”

She nodded. “Yes, even the ones inside my head.” She walked over and picked up the papers she’d scattered across the bed during a brainstorm. “Anything new?”

Brent shook his head. “No. We’re going to wait until morning and chase the cleaning staff down and see if anyone saw anything.”

She stuffed the papers into her laptop case. “And if they didn’t?”

“We move on.” He leaned back against the door. “They’re going to keep moving, so for now, so are we.”

She only nodded and then went to the scratched coffee table and picked up the take-out cups. She had to keep busy, do something.

Brent stood leaning against the door and watched her. She flit around the room straightening things. It was obvious searching was causing her as much anxiety as not searching did. “Why do you bother?” He spoke softly.

Felicity stopped with the papers still in her hands and turned to look at him. “Why do I bother straightening up?”

“No. Not the room.” He crossed his arms in front of his chest. “Putting yourself through the disappointments. You write it all down and hope somehow it’s going to show you the answers.” He nodded his head towards the creased notebook on the table. “I’ve read through that and I’m willing to bet there’s more than one of those notebooks and more than one instance described in them where things didn’t turn out well and left you hallow.”

She looked down at the sketch in her hand. “Not hallow. Quite the opposite really.” Her eyes looked at the notebook. “More often than not, I have no way of piecing things together enough to do any good.” She sighed. “Not that anyone listens if I try to do something about them.”

Brent raised his hands in question. “Then why? Why do you stay within reach of them and let it happen?”

She bit her lip for a few seconds. “I don’t let anything happen; it just does.” She tossed the papers onto the table. “I may escape ones that haunt me, but there’s always more – just in a different location.” She flipped her long hair back from her face. “I don’t get to choose who sends these to me. I don’t know why one person can reach out to me and another can’t. So, it’s my choice to keep track of what is given to me—on the chance that I may be able to do something with one out of many.”

Brent held up his hands in surrender. “I wasn’t faulting you for it. I just don’t understand how you can stand to do this repeatedly.”

Felicity leaned back against the dresser, wishing the room was larger and she could pace around more. “The few times I’ve made a difference, the very few times, I can’t explain the feeling. It’s like …” She waved a hand around. “I finally feel as if there’s a purpose for it—a reason for my torments. I can’t even describe how defeating it is to have this ability and not be able to use it.” Pacing over to the window, she looked out at the rain falling. “I often wonder why I’d be given this if I couldn’t do anything with it.”

He watched her silently for a moment. “Is everyone always a victim?” He couldn’t imagine spending his life with victims crying out inside his head.

Crossing her arms over her chest she turned to face him. “No.”

“No?”

Shaking her head, she let out a slow breath. “I’ve had a few that were rare moments of sheer joy in someone else’s life. I wished I had more of those actually.” She took a deep breath and let it out slowly as she sat on the edge of the worn couch. “I’ve had some that were the most grieving moments in life. From the loss of someone truly loved.” Felicity rubbed her hands over her face trying to ease the feeling of overburden. Looking up at him she whispered in an unsteady tone. “I’ve been trapped inside ones that were chaos and vile.” His eyebrows rose, but he didn’t interrupt her. “The article involving a lead to a murder weapon…” She could tell from his expression that he knew the one she referred to. “It was the killer’s mind I was inside. I didn’t sleep for months after those. I was trapped by emotions of rage and hatred. With the sick glee he felt from killing…” Taking a shaky breath, she looked back up at him. He still hadn’t moved. “I’m so scared.” A tear rolled down her face as she looked at him. “I don’t know where he is. I don’t know if he’s okay.”

Brent pushed away from the door and went over to her. He sat down beside her and slowly pulled her into his lap, cradling her tight against him. He wasn’t going to offer her false promises and say everything would be fine. He’d been a cop too long for that. What he could offer her was something she’d never had though, support.

She shook in his arms as she cried softly. Reaching over he pulled her completely into his arms. Her one arm wrapped around him tightly. Gently he ran his hand down the long length of her soft hair as he tucked her head under his chin. He held her like this until the crying eased, he didn’t know how long they stayed like this. When her arm relaxed and fell away, he knew she’d cried herself to sleep. With legs numb from lack of movement, he shifted slowly so he could lay her on the couch. Leaning over her, he looked down at the redness surrounding her eyes and wished he could somehow take the sorrow from her. Moving quietly, he pulled the blanket from the end of the bed and covered her.

Standing back, he looked around the room. The couple next door were probably all cuddled up together by now. He needed a coffee. Walking over to the dresser, he scooped up the room key sitting there and quietly went out the door.

He hadn’t planned on being gone this long, but he’d found it more than a challenge to find something that he thought a vegetarian would eat as a late dinner. He’d stood in the all-night café and looked at the menu for at least ten minutes trying to decide on something. What the hell did the woman eat? Was it always this hard to find something meatless? He’d decided against anything fried too, she’d mentioned something about tasting grease. Now he understood her trail mix. No wonder she was wafer thin and so tiny, she lived on nuts and seeds. Parking in the same place he’d left earlier, he climbed out and scowled as the rain dripped down the back of his neck. The light was still on in her room, so he balanced the coffee tray and cups and quietly unlocked the door.

Felicity was sitting on the couch, the blanket on the floor now. He started to smile and then stopped. Her eyes were far away again. She was locked in another vision. Swearing under his breath, he set the tray on the dresser and stood there watching her. How long had she been like this? Guilt swarmed him and he suddenly wished he hadn’t gone out. He moved closer and sat on the edge of the table. The paleness of her skin bothered him and he clenched his fists to stop himself from touching her. She’s been so upset not knowing, he didn’t dare stop this and leave her in the middle of whatever was going on inside her head.

Felicity blinked and let out a shuddering breath. Moving her eyes she looked down at the floor and then sucked in a breath. Reaching she grabbed Brent’s arm and squeezed. “He’s sick. Really sick, Brent.” She jumped up and paced around the room. “I saw a face, a man…” Spinning around she held her stomach. “We have to find him, there’s something wrong.”

Brent grabbed her notebook off the table and went over to her. “Write it down. Everything, now before you lose it.” He rubbed a hand down her arm. “I’ll go get Reid and Jac and then we’ll see if we can piece it together.”

She nodded several times and turned towards the small narrow desk. Flipping some papers aside she found a pen and sat down. She heard him go out the door but didn’t stop to look up.

Felicity was sketching hectically when she heard the door open again. Without seeing who had come in she whispered. “I can draw him, it was blurry. He had a mustache and trimmed goatee and was wearing glasses.” Finishing the sketch of the curtained window, she set the pencil down and turned to see all three standing by the door looking at her.

Brent went over and picked up the tray he’d brought in and carried it to her. “Take a few, and then tell us what you saw.”

Nodding, she took one of the cups from the tray. “Thank you.” She picked up the journal and handed it to him. He took it without a word and went to perch on the end of the couch. Taking a few sips, she closed her eyes and sighed. Without opening her eyes, she started to talk. “He’s very sick. His chest hurts, he doesn’t want to be awake.” Opening her eyes, she looked at Jac, who was standing with her hands clasped in front of her. “I didn’t see the man very clearly…”

Reid shook his head. “It’s more than we had. In the morning we can ask about a man with the boy.” He took the journal Brent handed him. “Did you see anything of where he was?”

Felicity set the cup down and nodded. “He really didn’t want to be awake. He kept looking at a window, with curtains.” She picked up the rough sketch and took it over to Brent.

He looked at it silently for a few minutes, then turned and looked at the curtains hanging limply with age on the window beside him. “It’s definitely still a motel of some sort.” He handed the sketch to Jac.

She looked at it for a moment then nodded. “It looks like it.” Handing it to Reid, she took the journal from him.

Felicity stood there in the middle of the room. Rubbing her hands down over her face, she sighed. “What if we don’t find him in time?”

Brent came over and ran his hands lightly down her arms. “Hey, we know now that they’re still using motels.” She nodded and took a shaky breath. “I brought you something to eat, which I have to say wasn’t easy to find something meat and grease free.”

She gave him a startled look and was about to decline when he shook his head.

“You have to eat; you won’t do any good if you make yourself sick.”

Felicity sighed. Reaching up she gently touched his cheek and smiled. “Thank you.”

He smirked. “Eat something, take a hot bath, and try to get some rest. We’ll come up with the plan and will be on the road again in the morning.” He waited until she nodded then stepped back.

Even after the food and the bath, which had felt great until she’d gotten out; she couldn’t stop the panic from rising through her. She’d tried sleeping, to no avail. She’s tried working on some drawings for her new book idea. That hadn’t worked either. Jac was asleep, which meant watching TV wouldn’t be polite. The room was too small to pace around. Sighing, she grabbed her jacket and stepped outside.

The air was cool and damp. The rain had stopped a few hours earlier leaving everything wet and glistening in the clearer night sky. She stood there leaning against the post outside the room. Without turning she knew one of the men had come outside, the silence had been broken by the click of the lock.

“Couldn’t sleep?” She heard a sigh before his words.

“Not a bit.” Brent went over to stand beside her. “Bath didn’t help you settle? My sister swears by them.”

She smiled up at him. “It worked great, as long as I was still in the steaming water. But I didn’t think falling asleep there would be a good plan.”

“No, probably not.” Turning, he ran a hand lightly down her hair. “You really should try to get some rest though; it might be a long day tomorrow.”

“I know. But I can’t shut it off when I close my eyes. I just keep seeing it over and over.” She leaned into the arm that still rested behind her.

Leaning down, he placed his hand under her chin, lifting her face up to his. “Maybe we’ll have to give you something else to think about for a while.” Gently he touched his lips to hers in a questioning touch. When she didn’t pull away, he opened his palm and cupped the side of her face, and brushed his lips over hers again. He heard her take a deeper breath and smiled against her mouth.

She turned into him and gripped his jacket lightly in one hand and lifted her face to his. The hand that had been resting lightly on her hair grasped a handful and pulled her into him. Tilting his head, he kissed her harder this time and took his time tasting her, breathing her in.

Pulling back so their mouths were just touching he meant to step away and let her go back inside, but she reached up and placed a hand around his neck and pulled his head back down to hers. Her mouth was open and demanding. When their tongues met in a teasing dance, he had to swallow the moan that threatened to escape.

Reaching behind her he scooped her against his long body and turned to hold her against the wall. Lifting her had fit her tightly against his body, in all the right ways.

Felicity grasped a handful of his hair and held on, not wanting him to move away again. Flames of need coursed through her, and her body reminded her how long it had been since she’d been near a man. Years, long years had need clawing at her.

His mouth tormented her with things she hadn’t known she yearned for. Her feet weren’t on the ground, so she wrapped one calf around his and held her body tight to his. She’d never felt dizzy from a kiss before, but she found her head spinning and didn’t want it to end. When he pulled his mouth away, she heard his breathing was as heavy as her own.

Brent rested his forehead against hers and took a few moments trying to focus. “You took my innocent intentions and incinerated them.” He brushed his lips over hers again. “Unless I rent a third room, our only other option right now is my car.” He kissed her again, harder this time. “And I think we need a bed, a whole room to continue this.”

Her body said the car was just fine at this moment, but her mind was agreeing with him. “Innocent intentions?” She whispered against his mouth.

“You should go inside.” He whispered it against her ear. She nodded and then dropped her leg slowly from his. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to let her go, but slowly he lowered her and moved a few inches away. “I’ll see you in the morning.” She nodded and moved to open the door. Fighting his own body, he grabbed her back against him and kissed her hard and thoroughly before dropping his hands and stepping back into his own room.

Felicity closed the door quietly and leaned back against it. Her body hummed a certain warmth she’d long forgotten. Touching her mouth lightly she smiled and then sighed and moved over to her bed to lie down. He’d definitely given her something else to think about.