Chapter 34 34
IRIAN SHAW.
My chest boiled in rage. I hadn't ever been embarrassed all my life like just at the pleasure house.
Zaugustus wouldn't say he didn't know it was me whom he chose. He knew so well that I was among those ladies, and that I had taken such steps because I wanted to be with him. But he had that whore suck his cock before my very eyes, neglecting me and leaving the pleasure house without even winking at me.
It could have been better if I were the one whom he had done that to. How hurtful it was watching that whore take his cock down her throat and suckle it like it was a meal to her made my chest almost explode.
Why would he do that? Was it his way of punishing me?
If he loved me, it wasn't a big deal having me stay alone with him since I was there. I wouldn't mind telling him how and why I came to the pleasure house because I wouldn't take such a step for another man if not him. Even those whores didn't know I wasn't one of them.
Did he even know the risk I took to do that? I had hit one of the whores and changed up like her. I could kill someone for him yet he doesn't even look my way any longer. How unattractive was I that he was acting like that? I was still beautiful, and he knew so much that men came to meet my father in the name of marriage, but he refused several times just so he would have him.
He alone wasn't the prize, but me too. So why would he think that I was unworthy?
I couldn't hold back my anger as I went back home. The more I thought about it, my dragon growled steadily at me.
Looking at my room and how tidy it was when I was losing the only man I ever loved, I couldn't stand it, but I began destroying and rearranging things there. I turned my room upside down, and by that time, I still didn't feel different.
I wanted to get hold of that whore who sucked my betrothed and smack her hard. Even if I took her life, I wouldn't care. Was it so difficult to refuse since almost everyone in the realm knew of our engagement?
That last time, he walked out on me because the fae female was missing, and now he dumped me and didn't even let me reach him after getting the satisfaction he wanted from the whore.
Tears finally blurred my vision after I promised myself not to cry for his sake again. He was hurting me so badly, and it was damaging my soul the most.
When my headservant showed up, I ordered her out because I needed to think. I didn't like drinking and had no liquor in my room, or I would just get myself drunk and sleep off, so I wouldn't recall anything.
But that moment, when I sat on the floor helplessly, uncontrollable tears streaming down my cheeks, the door of my chamber creaked open, and my father walked in. He glanced around at the mess I had made in my room and shook his head, then he grabbed a seat.
I turned to him, unsure if I was still sane. “Father, what am I going to do? Zaugustus is slipping through my fingers so much, and I would surely lose him soon. He doesn't even care about me, even if we met in public. He went after that fae female and found her; now she's his slave. How will I win him back again? I'm feeling so exhausted.”
He stared at me with pity, while I lamented. I had lost my mother at a tender age, and so my father was the only one I had. He had made sure that I got everything that I wanted, and so when I first laid my eyes on Zaugustus many years ago, I told him how I loved the Dragon Sovereign and would love to be his queen.
My father didn't hesitate and made it happen. I didn't know how he did it, but we were engaged, and our marriage was left to happen before the Dragon Sovereign was caged and sealed by the faes.
All those years, I turned down so many men who came for me, because I hoped that he would someday return to me again. Then why would he be treating me this way now that he was free and shouldn't hesitate our marriage since I waited for him?
I pushed my ass so close to my father and lay my head on his leg, sobbing and taking short breaths.
He patted my head gently, still thinking, until he told me, “What if I told you to give up on him?”
What was that question for?
I looked at him and scowled, “But…
“Do you just want to be the queen because you love him or because you love the position?” he asked again, and I lay back my head on his leg.
How would I answer that? I wanted power and authority, and being his queen would make me the second one with such power after him. So saying that I wanted to be his queen because I loved him was nothing but a lie, because he had never loved me, and I didn't care, provided he would still crown me his queen.
“Father, I want to be the dragon queen, and you would be the high flame lord. There are lots of people who look down on me that I need to take care of, and I don't want you to be disrespected, also. This is because I'm scared of losing him. After all, he wouldn't crown me if he didn't pay little attention to me.” I explained to him, sniffing.
He didn't respond for some time and kept patting my head, while I waited. There was no way he just asked me that question because I guessed that something was going on in his mind.
“If that's the case, then you need to stop forcing yourself on him. I made sure you're engaged with him, so I could end it by seeing that he's stripped of his power by the heavens and earth.”
As I heard that from him, I sat up, my gaze narrowed. “Father, do you mean dethroning him?” I asked, and he nodded. “But that's impossible to do. You never set him on the throne, so how will you do that? The gods will curse you.”
He scoffed. “And you think I would do that myself? He would commit what would make the heavens strip him; that's why I wanted to know how badly you were in love with him.”
I ran my tongue across my upper lip and shook my head. “As much as I love him, I only do so because of the power and authority he has. So if he's stripped, I wouldn't want him any longer.”
“Then, you have to quit thinking about him so much. If you reach him and he neglects, do not act rashly or even talk about it. Once I have him dethroned, the next ruler will surely crown you…because I will make sure he rules under my command,” he stated, and I looked up to him to be sure if he was really the one saying that. “What? Shocked, or you don't believe I would do it? I'm your father and must grant whatever wish you want…”
I couldn't hold back my smile and nodded.
Hours later, after my servants had finally arranged the room, I was just pacing from one end to another, thinking of what my father had just said to me hours ago. I caught the sketching of Zaugustus and picked it up, cleaned it and just stared at it.
Aside from his powers, he was every woman's dream. Handsome like a god, stoutly built, possessive and dominating. But if I can't get all those from him, then another woman shouldn't. He wouldn't just be stripped, but regardless of his powers, could also be killed by the heavens.
So, wouldn't it be better if he gave in to me? Maybe I should keep trying, because even if I became queen by another man, I wouldn't still want him with another woman. Even if it meant cheating on my king just to have Zaugustus dominate over me, I would still do that.