Chapter 56 – On the Edge of Truth
The knock echoed through the dorm like a warning bell. My whole body went rigid, my heart banging against my ribs as if it wanted out.
Declan’s voice was muffled but unmistakable. “Sam. Open up. We need to talk.”
Elias’s jaw clenched so tight I swore I could hear his teeth grind. He didn’t move from his spot between me and the door. Instead, he glanced back at me. “Don’t.”
“I wasn’t going to,” I whispered, though my pulse betrayed me. Declan’s words from earlier still gnawed at the edges of my mind, sharp and dangerous.
Elias didn’t trust that answer, because he strode to the door, bracing one hand against the wood. “He’s not coming in.”
“Elias—”
“No.” His voice was low, certain, leaving no room for argument.
Declan’s voice came again, smooth, with a hint of amusement. “You think hiding behind him makes you safe? Come on, Sam. You’re smarter than that.”
I squeezed my fists tight, nails biting into my palms. He couldn’t know. He couldn’t.
Elias tilted his head toward me. “Don’t say a word.” Then, louder: “He’s not talking to you tonight. Try again tomorrow.”
There was silence on the other side, long enough that I wondered if Declan had actually left. Then a soft chuckle. “Tomorrow, then.”
His footsteps faded, each one loosening the coil in my chest just a little. But when Elias finally stepped back from the door, I realized my hands were shaking.
He turned toward me, eyes sharp. “Why does he have this hold on you?”
“I—” My throat caught. “It’s not like that.”
“Then what is it?” He stepped closer, searching my face. “Because every time his name comes up, you shut down. You freeze. And you almost ran straight into his arms tonight like you couldn’t help yourself.”
My breath hitched. “You don’t understand.”
“Then make me,” Elias snapped, frustration cracking through his voice. “Because right now, you’re tearing yourself apart, and I’m just supposed to sit here and watch?”
I bit down hard on my lip, because he wasn’t wrong. I was tearing myself apart. I had been since the moment I set foot in this place wearing someone else’s skin.
“Elias…” My voice shook. “If I told you something—something huge—would you… would you promise not to hate me?”
His expression shifted. His shoulders lowered slightly, the fight in his posture giving way to something softer, more raw. “There’s nothing you could say that would make me hate you.”
He said it too fast. Too sure. He didn’t know what I carried.
“You don’t mean that,” I whispered.
“Yes, I do.” He crouched down in front of me again, like he had earlier when he patched me up. His eyes locked onto mine. “Sam, I mean it.”
The way he said my name made it harder to breathe.
The words swelled in my chest, pressing against my ribs, desperate to be free. I wanted to tell him everything. The nights spent in front of the mirror, binding myself into someone unrecognizable. The reason I came here. My sister. The truth of why I had to keep close to Declan no matter how much it killed me.
It all balanced on the tip of my tongue.
“I’m not who you think I am,” I blurted before I could stop myself.
His brows furrowed. “What do you mean?”
My stomach dropped. The room tilted.
I looked away, gripping the blanket on my lap so tightly my knuckles went white. “I mean… I’ve been lying. Since the beginning. About a lot of things.”
Elias leaned closer, his voice a low rumble. “Then stop lying now.”
I swallowed hard, my chest burning. “If I tell you, everything changes.”
“Maybe that’s what needs to happen.”
He didn’t understand. If I told him, I’d lose him. I’d lose the fragile safety I’d built.
“Elias, please.” My voice cracked. “Just… don’t ask me to say it.”
“I’m not asking,” he said, his tone sharp, but his eyes—God, his eyes were begging me. “I’m telling you. I can’t protect you if I don’t know what I’m protecting you from.”
I laughed bitterly, the sound breaking. “You can’t protect me from this. No one can.”
“Try me.”
I looked at him, at the boy who had been both my sharpest critic and my only refuge. The one who pulled me back when I almost drowned, who held me together when my disguise slipped. He deserved the truth. He deserved all of it.
And yet—
The image of my sister flashed in my mind. Her voice, her smile. The way she had looked at me before everything fell apart.
I bit my tongue so hard I tasted blood.
Elias’s hand brushed against mine, tentative, lingering. “Sam. Just tell me.”
My chest squeezed. My lips parted.
I almost said it. I almost told him everything.
But then—footsteps echoed down the hall outside. Laughter, voices carrying, the sound of dorm life rushing back into focus.
The fragile moment shattered like glass.
I ripped my hand back, shaking my head. “I can’t.”
Elias froze, hurt flickering across his face before it hardened into something unreadable. He stood slowly, stepping away, putting distance between us.
“You always stop right there,” he said quietly. “Right at the edge. Like you’re afraid of me seeing you.”
My throat burned. “I’m not afraid of you.”
“Then what are you afraid of?”
I couldn’t answer. Because the truth was right there, clawing to get out, and I was too much of a coward to let it.
The voices outside grew louder, footsteps coming closer to our door. Someone knocked, lighter this time.
“Yo, Elias! Sam! You guys in there?”
My whole body went cold.
Because the voice wasn’t friendly. It was Darren’s.