*Navya Pov*
I sat at the balcony turned towards the stairs and started waiting for him. I don't want to enter that room because I can't stay there without getting all the memories blasted into my mind within seconds.
What should I ask him? I thought, frowning. Or should I just let him tell me anything he wants? I got another thought.
But can I really hear whatever he wants to tell me? I don't think I can, but I have to hear them.
Actually, I don't even know I can trust him anymore. I don't think I can trust whatever he is going to tell me now, but I need to hear him before hurting myself like Mom said.
So after nearly one week I got myself to a grip that I can talk to him properly. This one week he went to the office correctly and also had his food like I asked him. I too had food on time, but I don't want to eat at all, so I just took very little food every time. But I am taking in something right.
The sound of his steps brought me out of my thoughts. He glanced one time to the right where the guest room is there and then started turning towards left.
But when he did, he saw me sitting on the balcony. He looked at me shocked for a few minutes and walked towards me. I gestured at him to sit beside me, and he did calmly.
"Tell me!" I mumbled, looking straight.
"What?" he asked me in a whisper.
"Tell me whatever you want to." I replied and turned towards him.
"Oh ok! First, I just want to say I missed you so much Nav..." he started saying, but stopped himself from saying my name.
"It's ok! You can say my name." I said, nodding my head. Because for the past one week, I just talked to myself saying that I am Navya, and no one can change it no matter what.
I think that self-talk and also Mom's talk is all I needed not to flinch at my own name. Now I am completely ok in hearing my name, but I just hope he doesn’t think about her.
"Right! I really missed you Navya. Please forgive me and let me tell you everything." He said looking at me.
"I am all ears for you now tell me but try to be honest." I said and saw him taking few breaths.
"As I told you I got very few friends, then Kavya even became one of them. She didn't care how my dad is and how anyone is talking about me. I got respect for her, and then we became great friends..." he started saying, but I stopped him showing my hand.
I took a deep breath and said, "I don't care what happened in the past. I don't care how you both met and how you feel for her. All I want to know is something, which relates to me and only me."
"Oh! I am sorry again. What you heard is true Navya but not completely. I... planned to do that at first and even did for a few days, but I stopped it completely later." He replied looking at me.
"Why did you change your decision?" I asked him.
"I got to know you Navya. I got to know what a great person you are, and I started to know you more by each passing day. I hated myself for behaving like that without you knowing about my behavior. I wanted to change it and make it up for you. Then in New York I saw another personal side of you which you hid from everyone." He replied.
"Did you love her, even after we got married?" I asked him holding the chair tightly in my arms.
"I don't know, but I thought I did, and I may have done. But I stopped loving her way back, and I don't even like her now." He replied and I don't even know what to feel by his answer.
"What if... what if I am not like me and am like some very normal girl who takes more time to open up? Then would you have continued to think me like my sister until you get to know me." I asked him fisting my hands.
"I... I may have done it for little long. But I would have got to know soon that I don't like 'Kavya' anymore even then." He replied closing his eyes.
I know we can't live with the 'What if's', but I can at least know how much worse was his thirst for revenge.
"Did you really kiss me thinking me as her?" I asked him again the same question from yesterday.
He nodded and I nodded back and asked, "Did you do it again?"
"No! I didn't. I mean I have to be honest, so I will say that I tried again, but I didn't. And later I only kissed you, to kiss you only." He immediately replied.
"You tried to do it again." I mumbled to myself.
"Yeah! I know what I did is wrong, but I left that part of revenge completely when we came here, and I got to know you more." He said and for one second, I didn't understand what is he saying.
"This is part of the revenge?" I asked him shocked.
"Er... yeah! I actually don't want you to find this at all forever and actually keep you happy for our whole lives." He replied.
"Happy? By completely closing my eyes and made me live my life without knowing a fact that I was touched so that the person can bear his heart break for not being with the one he wants." I said getting up.
"Navya! I really didn't think you as her after a few days." He said getting up.
"Oh Suhas! You did a very big sacrifice for me then." I said, shaking my head not believing his words at all.
"I am not saying that I made a sacrifice. All I am saying is I realized my mistake and stopped that part right there." He said closing his eyes.
"What is the other part and for whom?" I asked him hugging myself and hoping that I can bear it.
"It is for your family." He replied without blinking, and I gasped.
"My family? How dare you to even think of hurting them? I will never allow you to do it." I said in such a strong voice by which I got myself surprised.
"They deserve it Navya. You don't know what they did to me. Your dad didn't accept me for your sister and..." when he said that, I again stopped him showing my hand.
"So this is all about that one thing. He didn't accept you for my sister. So what? If every father accepts every proposal, his daughter gets, then they will be huge." I said feeling hurt because he is still hurt that he didn't get to marry my sister.
"Your dad is not how he looks like Navya." He said walking towards me.
"I know about my dad, and you need not to tell me. I can bear whatever you do with me, but I will not let you hurt them at all." I said walking away, but he followed me.
"You don't know about your family, Navya. They are so selfish and will do anything for their own sake. And do you..." He couldn't finish it because I slapped him.
I was shaking with the anger I am getting on him. He looked at me shocked and pressed his palm on the cheek where I slapped.
"Don't you dare to say any wrong word about my family. They love me so much, and I love them too. I will never let anyone do bad mouth on them." I said each word, glaring him and rushed to the guest room.
I locked the door and tried to stop myself from shaking. I don't care if I love him or not, but I will not let him hurt my family or say anything bad about them.
"Navya! I know I should have told all this calmly but trust me, I am telling the truth." He said knocking on the door.
I opened and looked at him saying, "I don't trust you anymore Suhas. I don't think I will ever will. And I really want a divorce."
"You can't break our marriage just like that Navya." He said looking at me shocked.
"I can't? Then tell me one thing. What were you thinking when we are getting married?" I asked him fisting my hands.
"Navya! Please, I really wanted it, so I didn't think about anything else." He said coming towards me.
But I stopped him asking, "What were you thinking about?"
"Revenge!" he replied, closing his eyes.
"You got it now, release me from that marriage which is not at all a marriage in the first place." I said controlling myself from breaking down in front of him.
"What are you talking about?" he asked, opening his eyes in shock.
"Marriage is a sacred thing, Suhas. At least, it is for me. When you didn't even think about me or us while we are going through it, then this is not at all a marriage in the first place." I replied fisting my hands and stopping myself from rubbing my chest to release the pain.
"Navya! Like I said I will not give you any divorce. I really like you Navya." He said, holding my fisted hands.
"I am sure you can forget me like you are saying you forget my Di. If you don't give me a divorce, then I will not eat anything hereafter onwards, and you can't do anything about it." I said after a few minutes that are after consoling myself from the pain that he actually doesn't love me but just likes me.