Part 45: Of Two Minds-2

Lex spooned some caviar onto a blini. "Eat something, Lucy. And please reconsider my offer of a friendly ear. As someone who's been married four times, I am certainly not one to offer relationship advice. But since you arrived in New York, you've seemed to thrive, while Quinn—I hate to say it, but my old friend seems to have gotten bitter, or jealous or something. Perhaps he doesn't like you stealing some of his spotlight? Some men are not comfortable with a successful, confident woman," he said. She selected a mini quiche and took a small nibble. It was buttery and decadent and absolutely delicious. She devoured it and went in for more. "No, that's not it. Quinn's comfortable in own skin and very supportive of me and my career." "Is he, though?" Lex scrunched up his face in a way that made him seem even older. "I understand he's under the weather, as you say. But the fact that he's not here says volumes. Especially after everything you went through in Nova Scotia last year with your father. If it were me, I'd be by your side," he said simply. With the second glass of champagne putting her at ease, she suddenly felt chatty. "Quinn was my rock during that time. He was really wonderful. I can't even tell you how much I love that man." She sighed. "We just clash sometimes, you know. He wants the best for me, and he's usually calm and steady. He hasn't been himself since—" "Since you arrived in New York," Lex finished her thought. She nodded. "Sometimes, even the most supportive boyfriends can be threatened by a successful woman. And you could go straight to the top, Lucy. That is, if you stayed in New York." "That is not an option. But I've enjoyed my time here. Very much," she said. "Well, if you change your mind, the vice presidency is still yours. Don't close the door so tightly. Just promise me you'll consider it." She nodded, although she had no intention of considering it for a second. She'd spend the weekend in Italy and then head back to Nova Scotia with Quinn. A few days away would let them start fresh and take back the hurtful things they'd both said, while leaving things on good terms with her mysterious and powerful new business contact in New York. Two hours later, she was totally relaxed. She'd changed into a soft sweatshirt and leggings and was able to enjoy supper in comfort. The coq au vin was delicious, although nothing that could rival Quinn's. They had quickly killed the first bottle of champagne and like magic, another arrived. After so much anxiety about the trip, she was actually enjoying herself. She had been prepared for anything — an inappropriate comment, or gesture, maybe even an overt pass. But Lex was a complete gentleman the whole time. She felt like maybe what she wanted to believe was true —maybe he was just a lonely but generally harmless, rich guy. "So, what was it like back in that cabin with your father on that awful day? You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to." Lex sat across from her, a small crystal glass of brandy in hand. She had declined the nightcap; already the champagne had gone to her head and she feared she was revealing more than she normally would. "Let's just say, I was surprised by the man I found that day. My father was a lot of things, but never cruel. He wasn't himself; I know that. But desperation changes people. I forgave him, and made my peace with it," she shrugged. "It's in the past." "Yes but telling you he wasn't even your father! He must have been in complete despair to push you away like that." She nodded. "He tried everything else, even discharging the gun and threatening me with it. I knew he was bluffing. He knew I would never leave his side. So, he stopped trying to scare me away and tried to push me away by being horrible." She shook her head. "That didn't work, either. The apple didn't fall far from the tree; I did get my stubborn streak from him." Lex smiled. "And you stayed with him. That's loyalty." "Until Quinn and my friend Keith showed up. Keith's a cop and he de-escalated the situation and got Dad the help he needed. That is, until he died a few months later." Saying it out loud still hurt even months later, but not as deeply as it once did. "So unfair. Just when he was getting his life together." Lex's eyes were sympathetic. "At least you got a chance to say goodbye. I didn't get that with my father." He shook his head. "I'm sorry," Lucy said, quietly. "As you say, it is what it is. What doesn't kill us makes us stronger and all that. But don't you find when something like this happens, it leaves something behind? I don't know how to explain it..." He trailed off, looking for the right words. "Like a stain on your soul," she finished. Recognition dawned on his face. "That's it. A stain that never truly goes away," he said. "No one else has ever understood it when I tried to explain. Here I was, the poor little rich boy with all the money in the world, and my father still took his own life and plunged my family into grief and misery. There you were miles away, going through something very similar. We're alike, you and I. We never let the sins of the father determine our path. We made our own way." "We did indeed," Lucy said, stifling a yawn with the back of her hand. "It's late, and I've kept you up. I have some work to do before bed, so I think I'll retire to my stateroom," Lex said, standing up. "Lucy, it's been a pleasure getting to know you better. Rest up, we've got a big day tomorrow. Once we land, we'll have some time to freshen up, and then I've arranged a tour of my personal vineyard for the team. Kurt will show you to your room, I hope it's to your liking. Good night." "Good night, Lex. And thank you for everything," she said. With a courtly bow, he was gone. Lucy had never slept in a bedroom on a plane before and was impressed with the luxury. It had certainly been a pleasant flight so far. There was nothing to worry about. She wished Quinn could have known that — better yet, she wished he had come with her. She hated sleeping without him by her side and worried about how he was doing. Regretting how their last conversation ended, she took out her phone to call him then remembered he'd be fast asleep. She glanced at her phone; no text back but that wasn't surprising. She'd speak to him tomorrow, she knew. They were fine. Or at least they would be. She yawned and stretched, happy to see Kurt coming up the aisle. She was about to ask him where her bedroom was (or, 'stateroom' in language of the filthy rich) when he pointed it out to her and asked her if there was anything else she needed. Tired and relieved, she shook her head and wished him a good night. She grabbed her purse and made her way to the bedroom, impressed at its size. She washed her face in the private bathroom and quickly brushed her teeth before changing into cotton pajamas and burrowing under the covers. Despite the comfort of the luxury private plane, Lucy found it hard to get warm during the flight. She was drifting to sleep when the reality hit with cold shock and her eyes flew open. She had been wrong; very wrong. Lex was no innocent, fatherly friend. The truth was staring her straight in the face the whole time, she was just too stupid to see it. She knew it now through one small but undeniable fact. There was no way he could have known what her father said to her the day he tried to end his life. Not unless Lex hired a private investigator to spy on her, and that person had gotten hold of the police report. Because she had not uttered those words to Quinn, Faye or anyone on the planet, except for the police. Of that, she was certain. She wasn't of two minds about Lex Brady, she never was. The battle was between her brain telling her everything was fine, and her gut telling her different. She chose poorly, as she always did when she had two choices about how to perceive someone's intentions. Now, she wondered what consequences lie ahead because of her naïve and dreadful mistake.