Just us
(Bella)
As I stomp my way back to my car, my heart raced, Dean's question echoes in my head nonstop.
He knows!
I can't help but wonder, did Judy tell him?
My nerves are like short now.
I saw the way he looked at Javier and Jasmine, his gaze though tender and gentle, holds a calculated look in them, as if he's quickly figuring things out in his head.
And the resemblance is quite uncanny, the timing. He's smart, I'm sure he must've connected the dots.
Hence, his nerve-wracking question.
I don't know why everything seems to be happening at the same time.
First, it was Judy trying her crap on me and now Dean.
I really do not know what to expect next. But one thing is certain, no one is taking my babies away from me, I'll keep them away from this chaos even it's the last thing I do.
I take a deep breath, trying to soothe my frazzled nerves before getting into the car.
As I step in, the tension in the car doesn't go unnoticed, taking a quick glance at Javier and Jasmine, they're unusually quiet, their eyes avoiding mine.
I look at Anne, and she gives me a small smile.
I know what this is about, but my nerves doesn't let me address it just yet.
I pull my gaze away from them and back to the steering, but not before I instinctively glance at the rearview mirror, checking the spot where Dean's standing. He isn't there. I stare into the distance for a second longer before looking away, starting the ignition.
The ride back home was quiet, almost too quiet, I steal glances at Jasmine and Javier from time to time, and my babies who are always full of energy and wears a smile on looks sullen.
My heart goes out for them but I don't say anything.
Once we got home, they quickly ran up to their rooms.
My face falls flat as I watch them before shrugging into the couch.
"I will get you a glass of water," Anne offers with a subtle smile, obviously wanting to cheer me up.
I look at her, managing a smile back. "I'll appreciate that. Thanks." I mutter, resting my back on the couch, my thoughts running wild.
As much as I don't want to regret my decision, as much as I'm willing to face my fears and my past. But now I can't help but think that coming back here was really a bad idea.
With the chaos lurking around, threatening to burst forth, believe me it really is.
But then, my question is, will I keeping running forever?
I don't think so.
I better brace myself and face whatever comes to me moving forward.
I pull my phone out of my bag and quickly scan through my contacts for Derrick's number, there I see it, my fingers fly across the keyboard as I type out a message to him.
Bella: Rick, I think Dean knows about Javier and Jasmine and you know what that means. He asked if they're his.
Quickly I click send. Anne's gentle stride pulls my attention away from my phone.
"Here you go," she says, extending the glass of water, a warm smile in place.
I manage a smile. "Thank you," I mutter, taking it.
I gulp down the content, taking a deep breath as I turn to Anne, returning the empty glass to her.
"How do you feel?" She asks, watching me closely.
I look at her expectant face and nod slowly. "I feel alot better," I reply.
Her smile widens as she nods before she disappears into the kitchen once again.
My phone beeps with a text from Derrick. I take it, glancing through.
Derrick: What wait? He saw them? Where are you?
I type back quickly.
Bella: Yeah, he did. I'm home now.
Derrick: Good. I'll come over first thing in the morning, hope you're okay?
Bella: I'm trying to be. You really don't have to, I'll be fine eventually, just thought you should know.
Derrick: I'm not listening to you. You don't have to go through this on your own. I'll be there in the morning.
Bella: Thank you Rick.
I click send.
I tilt my head remembering what's been on my mind aside this, I type back.
Bella: Any news from the detective?
Derrick: Not yet. But we're staying positive.
I sigh, dropping my phone on the couch. It's taking far too long to get a lead on this, will I be able to find her?
That unnerving question gnaws at me. I want to be positive like Derrick's been but the possibility, the sheer reality, the fear that we might never find her creeps in, like a whisper in the back of my mind.
I push the thought aside, my mind drifting back to Javier and Jasmine.
I better check on them.
As I head to their room, my steps are heavy and calculated as I think of a way to soothe them, hoping it works.
I feel bad, I shouldn't have acted like that, not with them there.
Plus I know Javier was excited seeing him, I mean he's been wanting to see him again but I just couldn't help it.
And I'm sure they'd be wondering why. But they're kids, they won't understand.
I'm just being a mother, I'm sure every mom out there will do anything to protect their kids.
Not when I'm unsure of Dean and his mother's intentions.
Not a chance.
I go over to Javier's room as my instincts lead me and there they are, my cute little munchkins, cuddled up on the bed.
A pang of guilt settles over me as I watch them a little longer but then it's for the best.
Sometimes a woman's gotta do what a woman's gotta do.
I don't want them entangled in this chaos, it'd break me.
I just want my babies with me.
No drama, no chaos, just us.