Light in my dark world
(Bella)
"Mommy!"
"Oh, no," I mutter under my breath as I pause halfway up the staircase, laughing at myself inwardly at my poor attempt to tiptoe to my room unnoticed.
"Mommy you're home so late," Javier says.
"Were you trying to hide mommy?" I hear Jasmine's voice and her little flip flops behind me.
And when I turned she has her tiny arms crossed while Javier is seated at the dinning table, looking at me with those adorable puppy eyes, and I sure as hell know where he got that from.
Just then, Anne emerges from the kitchen, chuckling at the situation.
I put on a smile immediately, knowing my babies won't stop asking questions if I don't answer.
I walk over to Jasmine, bending to her level. "Of, course not, baby. Mommy is just a little bit tired," I replied, stretching my hand a little, just to sound convincing.
Quickly I turned my gaze to Javier.
"I'm sorry I'm late again, sweety." I do feel guilty coming home late this past weeks but work has been pretty hectic.
But then again, I need to discuss my workload and make out time for my kids because they're my priorities. I don't want to bother Calvin about this, though he wouldn't mind, but he's done too much for me.
Getting me a stable work with a fat paycheck in his company, he's been there throughout my pregnancy journey up until now.
I shift my gaze to Anne. "They shouldn't be up, look at the time," I say, glancing over at my wristwatch while ruffling Jasmine's hair gently.
Anne shrugs a little. "I did try to get them to bed but they wouldn't. You know they love eating their dinner with you,"
Right. I mutter under my breath, my guilt piqued.
I stand up, walking over to the dinning table with Jasmine.
"You won't be home late again, right?" Javier says, drawing my attention to him. I look at his tiny frowning face and shrug.
"Never again, baby. I promise," I reply, trying to coax him and just then I watch a smile spread across his face.
"Okay mommy. Let's eat. Nanna Anne made your favorite," he says his eyes gleaming.
I stare a little bit longer at his cuteness and his eyes, exactly like his father's. Moving on from Dean is hard with his eyes and face being the best part of my day. Javier looks so much like him.
"And I'm sleepy, mommy." Jasmine says, making me to shift my attention to her and then she yawns a little just to make a point.
"Little miss dramatic, huh?" I teased as a slight chuckle slipped out of my mouth.
After about an hour or so. I give Jas a tender kiss on the forehead, a warm feeling bubbles inside me as I stare at her pretty face a little longer. I step out of her room and entered Jav's. I repeat same routine till he was fast asleep.
Closing his door gently behind me. I let out a tired breath.
God, I'm so tired.
Being a mom to a four-year-old twins and a busy manager at a reputable company has not been an easy job but thanks to Anne and of, course Calvin.
And this adorable cuties?
They've been a ball of bright light in my dark world and I thank God everyday that I kept them.
Javier and Jasmine. Yeah, they came out in that order. They're one of my biggest drive to do better and better every day and I swear, I'm going to give them the world.
I walk straight into my room. What I need right now is a warm bubble bath and a good night sleep.
Once done bathing and doing my night facial routine. I decided to check my phone.
I almost forgot Derrick asks that I let him know when I get home.
I pull my phone out of my purse and he's messaged me already, alongside Calvin.
Calvin: Hope you got home safe?
Calvin: I asked Patricia to clear some of your schedule starting tomorrow. Not comfortable with the workload lately. And there's something I need to talk to you about.
A smile spreads across my face as I read up. I didn't even have to ask, such a good man.
But then, he has something to talk about. For some reason I feel like I know what this is about, he's been looking to expand back to base and once that is done, it's the inevitable.
Quickly I type back, pushing my thoughts aside.
Bella: Oh, thank you, Calvin. I'd appreciate it. Alright, let's talk tomorrow then. Goodnight.
I click on Derrick's message and just before I could text back, his call came in.
I settle into the bed, resting my back properly before taking the call.
Rick: Hey sis.
Bella: You're still up?
Rick: Yeah, been waiting for your call.
Bella: Forgive me, walked in on Jas and Jav waiting to have dinner together. Had to put them to bed afterwards and work's been hectic.
Rick: Mommy's babies, aren't they? And Bella you need to reduce your workload, you've been working long hours lately.
Bella: I know, but the good thing is, Calvin's reducing my workload starting tomorrow.
Rick: Speaking of Calvin, why aren't you two a thing yet? He's rich, caring, kind and don't tell me you don't know how he feels about you.
I roll my eyes, taken aback by Derrick's question. I hesitate, knowing that Derrick is just trying to matchmake Calvin and I.
My hand lingers on my phone as I try to type back.
Bella: I see what you're doing, Rick. But trust me, Calvin and I are just business colleagues and I intend to keep it that way.
Rick: It's been four years Bella, you need happiness. You need love, we all do. Give yourself a chance to be happy again, with Calvin.
Bella: I'm happy, right here with Jav and Jas and you. That's all I need.
Honestly, Calvin is the kind of man every lady would kill to have. Sometimes I just wish I haven't given every last drop of love to Dean, maybe I might be able to fall in love with a man like Calvin. But he deserves to be with someone who loves him fully and I'm not ready for that yet, I don't think I'd ever be.
And most importantly I see him as a friend, as Derrick's best friend.
I don't see anything romantic happening between us, even though he's confessed his feelings to me, I think we're better off as friends and anytime I'm ready to do love again, it'd definitely be Calvin.
I'm still lost in my train of thoughts when Derrick's voice pulls me back to earth.
Rick: Wait, are you still in love with your ex-husband?