Chapter 118 - Situations at Baptism (Part 3) - Feddos
Diana
I smiled, grateful that he didn't want to know more about the subject. From the lady, I learned that he had two degrees, just like Simón, and a number of specializations and courses, all related to technology. He was an engineer. Meanwhile, I... God, I felt so dirty.
I wasn't ready. I would be ashamed if he found out about the many men who abused me. When I reached fifty, I stopped counting. I say abused because none of it was with my consent. Besides, the idiot who bought my virginity was the same one who got me pregnant. He was disgusting and became obsessively fixated on me in a sick way.
"Diana?"
"I've already enrolled in several online courses. As soon as we get back to the capital with the lady's advance, I'm going to buy a laptop so I can study at night, and next year I'll see what degree I want to pursue. I like administration and finance. What did you study?"
"Why don't you study now? I'm a pilot and a mechanical and electronic engineer." Three degrees?
"Isaac is still very small. He needs to be fed by me. If I study, he won't nurse for more than six or seven hours. I can't leave him for that long." He looked at me tenderly. "I knew you were an engineer, but not a pilot. What kind of pilot are you?"
"Of any mode of transport: airplane, helicopter, boat, yacht, cars, motorcycles, bicycle, tricycle." We burst into laughter. I couldn't imagine him on a tricycle.
"Wow."
"You know that 90% of women who are raped end up hating the consequence of that situation. But you... you accepted it. You're not resentful."
"Miguel, I never talk about my sad childhood. I try to speak constructively, so people see me as an example of overcoming adversity. I want to project that image at least. I don't want to inspire pity." I sighed.
"But everything has two truths. The other truth is that my mother was a highly sought-after prostitute in town, and by some mistake, she got pregnant with me. She tried to abort me three times. I confess, in moments of despair, I've asked the man upstairs why I clung to life so much, and I don't believe it was for what I've lived through so far..." Miguel's face was inscrutable.
"I was always a burden to her. She blamed me because her clients no longer sought her out due to the stretch marks from the pregnancy and the cesarean... Anyway, imagine all the abuse I endured until I turned twelve."
I looked at my son. He had woken up and would soon ask for food. But his godfather came and took him. God, Isaac was born with the angel that was denied to me.
"I'll be very honest with you. When I found out I was pregnant, I wanted to reject him. But I thought about it and knew what I suffered. He won't feel that disdain or abandonment from his mother. He won't suffer the same as I did. I'm small but fierce."
"Our son, Diana." He smiled a little, though his clenched fists told me how upset he was by my story. "And you're a minion." I punched him on the shoulder.
"I love children's movies. And there are shorter women." Our eyes met again. "Don't tell anyone this. I hate inspiring pity."
"You wouldn't inspire those kinds of feelings. On the contrary."
At that moment, a man I hadn't been introduced to invited me to dance, but I didn't have to refuse.
"Díaz, don't get yourself into trouble. The mother of my child gave birth just a month ago. She can't dance."
The man's face changed colors. He looked towards Simón, who was laughing with Arnold, Gustavo, Daniel, Aníbal, and Santiago.
"Sorry, Cebolla, I didn't mean to bother your woman. Forgive me. It's just that Mojón and Rata..."
"I see, Díaz. Don't worry. I already figured out the jerks who sent you over. You're forgiven."
This man made my pulse race, taking me on an emotional rollercoaster. God, sometimes I felt like he was jealous, though he didn't come closer, and I wanted him to, but I had nothing to offer him, just a very used body. The man left, and Miguel's look towards his friends was priceless.
"This baby is hungry."
Mrs. Vero handed me the baby, and I went inside the house to feed him. The rest of the afternoon was very pleasant. A folk band arrived, and the wives of the workers danced animatedly. They insisted the lady dance, and I was surprised to see how well she danced. After pleasing them, she left. There was plenty of food, and I was very full. It was nine at night, and I was tired. Miguel was with his friends. We didn't talk again. I knew they were watching me, but it wasn't him, or I didn't catch him at any moment.
I said goodbye to Gladis, who couldn't stop dancing with Gustavo, and to Clarisa, who was holding a sleeping Sebastián in her arms. When I entered the room, the air conditioning was cold. I changed his diaper, put on his pajamas, fed him, and once he was in a deep sleep, I laid him in the crib that was in the room. They seemed like magicians, or maybe that was the gift of having money.
They thought of everything. I went into the bathroom, wanting to take a shower, but the problem was I didn’t know how to operate the sophisticated shower. How do you get the water to come out? Embarrassed, I went in search of the lady of the house. When I entered her room, I saw she was asleep, so I returned to the room and saw Miguel stroking the baby’s head.
"When we arrived, there was no crib for the baby, so I asked one of the workers to buy one in town." He fell silent when he saw me and understood. He sighed.
"Thank you." He couldn’t take his eyes off my body, as I was in a short towel. "Miguel, do you know how to get the water to come out?" He burst out laughing, understanding the situation.
"We overlooked that detail. Tomorrow we’ll add your fingerprint to the system, but for now, mine will work. How long do you take to shower?"
"What?"
I felt my cheeks flush more than they already were. He glanced at me sideways. God, he was incredibly attractive to me.
"Diana, everything is computerized. The shower won’t work unless activated. To get it to work, I need to use my fingerprint and set the time. I need you to tell me, how long do you take to shower?"
"About ten or fifteen minutes."
He placed his fingerprint in front of the sink, and I saw a panel appear on what I thought was a mirror. He pressed the shower option and set it for fifteen minutes.
"All set."
A sophisticated showerhead emerged in the shower area, and water started to flow.
"Damn! What if I need to use the toilet?" He laughed again.
"The toilets don’t have that problem; they don’t need a fingerprint."
He smiled, then swallowed hard as he looked at me again and stroked a strand of my hair.
"Goodnight... and don’t cut your hair again."
Before leaving, he kissed my forehead. I couldn’t say anything; my skin tingled with emotion. He closed the door without looking back. I showered, then put on pajamas and got under the covers. I moved the crib closer to have my son nearby and fell into a deep sleep.
Raquel’s blows came back to me. My body ached from the beatings, my legs were covered in blood, and I couldn’t understand her hatred. Then I was in a room with a man licking his lips at the sight of me in transparent clothing, which I didn’t know where it came from. The day before, I had received many blows; my back was bruised. They made me drink something, and my head was fighting, but my body wasn’t. The man started touching me. I wanted to hit him, but I couldn’t. I started kicking and screaming. Hands were holding me, and a soft voice whispered.
"Diana, it’s just a dream. Wake up, darling."
I was sweating. Miguel’s voice began to calm me. He rocked me in his arms, and I started to cry. I felt dirty again, so dirty. So many hands had touched my body, and I wanted to erase them. I seemed hysterical, trying to rid myself of that feeling with my hands.
"Touch me."
I shouldn’t have said it, but I needed it. It was crazy, but I wanted a memory that was desired, not imposed.
"What are you saying?" His voice grew deeper.
"Touch me, Miguel. Erase the memories, please."
"Don’t say..."
I knew what he was going to say, and I didn’t let him. My head was resting on his neck, and I leaned in to kiss him. It was my first kiss out of my own desire. A current ran through my body, making everything tingle. For a few seconds, he remained motionless while I continued to kiss him. When I was about to give up on being reciprocated, his hands gripped my hips, and he responded to the kiss.
Books spoke of passion, but it felt different. A sweet and frantic sensation inexplicably emanated from my body, which intensified when I felt Miguel’s hand roam over it. His strong hands gripped my skin with devotion without letting go of my lips, which he captured with lust...