Chapter 180

Chapter 185
Natalie POV


I moved through the forest with Gina's guidance, my boots crunching softly on fallen leaves as we avoided the patrol routes we both knew by heart. The familiar weight of my pack pressed against my shoulders, and I could feel the dampness of morning dew seeping through my jeans where I'd brushed against low-hanging branches.

Every step away from Nathan's village felt like a physical ache in my chest, a tightening that made it hard to breathe, but I forced myself to keep moving forward. The sun filtered through the canopy above, casting dappled shadows that danced across the forest floor as I checked its position through the gaps in the leaves to gauge how long we'd been traveling.

"We need to keep moving," Gina said, her voice carefully neutral in my mind. "The patrols will be switching routes soon."

I nodded, even though she couldn't see the gesture, my hand automatically reaching up to touch the empty space at my throat where my moonstone pendant should have been. The absence felt like a constant reminder of everything I'd lost.

Gina had been deliberately keeping our conversation focused on practical matters—which paths to take, how to avoid detection, when to rest. She knew better than to bring up what we'd left behind, what I'd walked away from in that cabin where Nathan was probably just now discovering my note.

The decision I'd made felt both right and devastating. Nathan deserved better than a mate who could only offer him stolen moments between royal obligations. His wolf would eventually understand that, even if his heart didn't want to accept it yet. I could still feel the phantom warmth of his arms around me, the way his breath had felt against my neck as he slept.

Hours passed as we made our way through increasingly familiar territory, my legs burning from the constant uphill climbs and my throat growing dry. When we reached a small stream, I stopped to drink, cupping the clear, ice-cold water in my hands and splashing some on my face. The shock of it helped clear my head, though it did nothing for the exhaustion weighing down my limbs like lead weights.

"We could shift and run back," Gina suggested. "It would be much faster."

I sat back on my heels, considering, my fingers trailing in the rushing water as I watched it flow over smooth stones. "I know. But I think I need this time to calm down before I see everyone."

"You made the right choice," Gina said quietly, and I could feel her approval radiating through our connection like warm honey. "His wolf told me they wouldn't leave the pack, and you can't abandon the throne. Especially after everything your mother has done to reclaim it and bring the council to heel."

"Thank you, Gina," I whispered, my throat tight with unshed tears. "But that doesn't make it easy."

"I know. I can feel it too. You really love him."

The simple statement hit me like a physical blow, stealing the breath from my lungs. "I do love him. That feeling will never go away."

"I wish I could give you a hug right now."

Despite everything, I found myself smiling slightly, the first genuine smile I'd managed since leaving Nathan's cabin. "Let's just get home."

I stood and continued walking, letting my feet carry me forward while my mind wandered through memories I was trying not to revisit. The afternoon stretched on endlessly, and I lost myself in thought, trying not to dwell on what I'd left behind.

My stomach growled, reminding me I hadn't eaten since dinner the night before, but I ignored it. As the sun began to sink toward the horizon, painting the sky in brilliant oranges and purples, Gina stirred restlessly in my consciousness.

"We should stop and make camp," she suggested, her mental voice tinged with fatigue.

"I want to keep going," I replied firmly, my jaw set with determination. I couldn't stop now—stopping meant thinking, and thinking meant potentially turning around and running back to Nathan. I had to get home, had to remind myself why I'd made this choice.

"You need rest—"

"I need to keep moving."

Gina fell silent after that, and eventually I felt her presence fade as she dozed. With her quiet, my thoughts settled into a more manageable rhythm. I deliberately steered them away from Nathan's cabin, from the warmth of his arms and the way he'd looked at me with such tenderness.

Instead, I focused on Jackson—his worried face, his protective instincts, the way he'd probably been searching for me without rest, his dark eyes scanning every shadow for signs of danger. I thought about my parents, about my room in the castle with its familiar blue walls and the view of the ocean, about all the people who were counting on me to return.

As full darkness fell and the temperature dropped, making me shiver in my thin jacket, I finally gave in to practicality. I found a secluded spot behind a cluster of pine trees, stripped off my clothes with fingers stiff from cold, and let the familiar heat of transformation wash over me.

The change rippled through my body like liquid fire, bones shifting and reforming as my silver wolf emerged, and I carefully picked up my bundled clothing in my teeth before setting off at a loping run.

"Finally," Gina said drowsily. "Though we could still stop for the night..."

"No," I said firmly, my paws finding their rhythm on the forest floor, claws digging into the soft earth for purchase. "We're going home."

My wolf form felt strong and sure beneath me, muscles working in perfect harmony as we covered ground with fluid grace. The night air was crisp and clean, filled with the scents of pine and earth and the distant smell of snow.

Gina grew tired as the night wore on, and we slowed our pace slightly, but I refused to stop completely. The steady motion helped quiet the turmoil in my mind, each stride taking me further from temptation and closer to duty.

When the sun began to rise, painting the sky in soft pastels of pink and gold, Gina stopped us at the peak of a snow-covered mountain. The view was breathtaking—endless white forests stretching out below us like a frozen sea, the morning light catching on the snow crystals and making everything sparkle like diamonds scattered across velvet.

"Look," she said softly, and I paused to take in the beauty of it, my breath forming small clouds in the frigid air. For a moment, the sight eased some of the ache in my chest, reminding me that there was still beauty in the world despite the pain.

We continued on, and eventually the landscape became familiar—the particular arrangement of boulders, the distinctive bend in a frozen creek, the ancient oak tree split by lightning years ago. When we reached a forest I recognized—one I'd walked through countless times on my way to school—I shifted back to human form and quickly dressed, my skin prickling with goosebumps as the cold air hit my naked flesh.

My hands shook slightly as I pulled on my clothes, whether from cold or nerves, I wasn't sure. The familiar weight of my human body felt strange after hours in wolf form, and I had to steady myself against a tree trunk as I regained my balance.

The final stretch felt both eternal and far too short. When I emerged from the trees and saw the courtyard in front of the castle, I stopped short, my breath catching in my throat. Hundreds of people were gathered there, far more than I'd expected to see—wolves from different packs, their various scents mingling in the air, creating a complex tapestry of unfamiliar territories.